Sliding Doors.......

isie1980

A bit rambling but hopefully will make sense....This definitely isn't about regret, more about a lucky escape from the life that could've been....

At 23 I lived with my then boyfriend, earned £35k and spent like no tomorrow (yes even though it was an amazing salary I still racked up debt).
My boyfriend told me he didn't love me anymore, but wouldn't discuss the sale of our home, so I had to use solicitors for us to break up.
I spotted a bedsit in the paper for sale at £20k. Thought it was an opportunity for a rental flat or bolt hole as ex wouldn't move out or let me buy him out, and borrowed the full £20k. My offer of £16k wasn't accepted and I had £20k burning a hole in my pocket so on a whim I put it down as a deposit on a £100k flat to either rent out or move into. I ended up remortgaging in my sole name to buy out my ex, so ended up with our 3 bed semi and a flat.
I then got ill. Depression leading to some recreational drug abuse which led to more depression which led to me being off sick for 3 months before handing in my notice as my job pressure was one of my stressers. Then I added up my debt - £53k!!!
So, no job, no money, I started applying for jobs like crazy. I accepted a job at my current work for £24k and started an IVA. My sister was buying a flat so I sold the house and gave the £2k profit to my creditors and rented a room off my sister. The market had started to fall and creditors agreed it wasn't worth selling the rental flat, and I was making a loss on it each month.
Anyway in my new job I met my OH. I confessed my debt during the first couple of weeks of dating as it meant we couldn't really go out, have a holiday or anything. He was trying to clear his credit card so we agreed to date frugally!
A year after we got together my OH was run over and ended up in intensive care. Our first holiday together (a mini break to Salzburg) had to be cancelled, but he made a full recovery.
Fast forward 3 years and the two of us moved into the rental flat - economically we were better off living there together, and OH rented out his flat. Luckily he got a 'base rate + x%' Buy-to-let mortgage before the base rate crashed. The mortgage on it dropped to £38 a month!!
So we moved in and I entered a competition. WE WON OUR WEDDING!! We weren't even engaged but we went and got a ring that night and married 3 months later in Austria (near Salzburg) all expenses paid. I got a £40 dress and he wore F&F from Tesco lol. My now husband did pay for a small reception so that cost around £1500.
2 years or so after our wedding my hubby was awarded compensation from his accident which enabled him to buy us our house together, then shortly after we learned we were expecting our first baby. My creditors agreed a full and final settlement of my IVA to allow me to save for my 6 months maternity leave.
During the 6 years I have been in my current job I have had annual payrises, and the company even paid for me to complete my MBA and gave me shares on graduation. My rental flat is still making a loss on a month by month basis but I have a small amount of equity in it, and hubby's flat makes a small profit. We're accidental landlords!

Since getting dumped in 2003 and having £53k debt my life has just turned around amazingly. Until my ex ended things I repeatedly turned down his proposals (too young).
I often wonder where my life would have taken me if I'd married young and stayed with him.

My ex is now on his 2nd marriage since we split (3rd marriage overall!) and me and hubby will be celebrating 7 years together as our son turns 1 this summer. The events that seemed to tear my world apart have actually been the making of me and the great life I have now! I have always been a positive person and I believe this has contributed to my 'luck'.

make_me_wise

Many years ago I was offered a fantastic job opportunity teaching in a school overseas. I was about to accept the post when my father was diagnosed with cancer. I just didn't feel able to up and leave and move to the other side of the world, when my parents world had just fallen apart.

So I reluctantly turned the offer down. After months of treatment my dad was given the all clear and touch wood it has never come back. During that time I met my now husband and my life has been happy and succesfull and I am more content right now than I ever imagined possible.

I dont exactly look back with regret on having not taken that job and had that experience. I will admit though to sometimes wondering 'what if'. I am a true believer in fate and do think that we all have a path we are meant to follow. What is meant for us wont pass us by in the long run.

lilrahi

A lot of people's sliding doors is to do with marriage

Mine is the same!

I sometimes wonder what kind of life I would be leading if I decided not marry my husband. There was a lot of family pressure, because my parents didn't approve of him, and I almost decided not to marry him and respect families' wishes.