A bit of advise please

funkycat06

I met my OH about 6 months ago and in august i cam into a bit of money. I lent him some money and i kept the receipt a) to make sure it had gone in and b) because i always keep things like that anyway .
Last night , we were talking and i happened to mention the receipt in conversation. My OH then proceeded to go in a huff and started saying i don't trust him etc or that im keeping it to throw back at him if things go wrong. I'm not like that at all though.


Just wondered whether you would feel the same about it or is he overreacting ?

victory

Over reaction and maybe a bit of guilt that he has not offered to pay it back or has he already?

Errata

A receipt? One that he signed? Or the Bank paying in slip? In any event, it's none of his business what paperwork you keep on your finances.

Caroline73_2

funkycat06 wrote: »

I met my OH about 6 months ago and in august i cam into a bit of money. I lent him some money and i kept the receipt a) to make sure it had gone in and b) because i always keep things like that anyway .
Last night , we were talking and i happened to mention the receipt in conversation. My OH then proceeded to go in a huff and started saying i don't trust him etc or that im keeping it to throw back at him if things go wrong. I'm not like that at all though.


Just wondered whether you would feel the same about it or is he overreacting ?

So one month after meeting him you lent him money. Five months later he hasn't paid it back.

What did you arrange in terms of repayment? What kind of figure was it?

Tbh I would have expected back by now and the fact he made you out to be the bad guy rather than apologizing for not having paid it back makes me think he never intends to pay it back.

DVardysShadow

funkycat06 wrote: »

... Just wondered whether you would feel the same about it or is he overreacting ?

Don't upssy foot around this.Ask him outright what his plan is to pay the money back. What the plan is is not so important as whether he has a plan to pay it back or whether he goes into a huff. If there is not even a rudimentary plan, just a huff, get rid of him.

Lotus-eater

Firstly, you shouldn't have lent him any money.
2ndly, he shouldn't get in a huff with anything like that. Sounds very dodgy to me. It sounds like something is going on.

go_cat

Sorry but very much doubt you will ever see this money again

Giving money to a new partner after just a month is ludicrous

doodoot

A. Ask him why he feels uncomfortable about you being organised with your finances.

B. Why hasn't he paid it/some of it back?

C. Treat his reaction as a warning sign that things are not right.

Did you arrange a time scale for repayment and how it would be paid back?

In full or instalments?

Seanymph

I'm with the others - I'm afraid you are being had - for you to doubt yourself and for him to take issue with you having a receipt indicates an unhealthy imbalance.

I hope it wasn't much you leant him, because from that snippet it really does look as if he isn't intending to pay it back. He's trying to bully you into leaving it alone.

funkycat06

i leant it him on the understanding that he is due a large sum of money from a company and i have seen all the paerwork etc, it was the bank paying in slip yes and id keep it whether it was a family member or whatever .Thanks for the replies and yes i guess it was a bit early to lend him money but i had known him for a long time before we got together. To be fair though he has helped me out when ive needed things etc but i was totally shocked at his reaction .

Errata

In what parallel universe does he think people don't keep Bank paperwork? His reaction seems quite bizarre.