Should I ask to go into hospital? I feel like I'm in crisis with mental health

HappySaver1968

meritaten wrote: »

happy - it sounds like someone is finally LISTENING to your probs! sounds like you have been Identified as a Vulnerable Adult. Thats good! you have people on YOUR SIDE now!
Let them help you - take thier advice. and if they can get you some respite care thats brilliant. a few days away - just what you may need!
good luck hun!

I really appreciate your response. Could you tell me a little bit more about this Vulnerable Adult thing? I'm in my 40s and I didn't think it was possible for a man of my age to be seen as such as I thought it was just kids, pensioners, people with learning difficulties. I feel stronger in that as you say, people are now listening to me and I'm not alone anymore. That counts for SO much, believe me. I'm looking forward to my break actually and wish it was tommorow and not a few days away.

Enjoy your night, John.

Emmzi

Hi John, "vulnerable adult" covers a range of people, including as you say the elderly and those with learning difficulties, but also people with depression that affects their day to day lives - which I think you have suggested includes you.

You may not feel it is the right time now, but if they are prepared to help you stop you wife's behaviour, it's good just knowing you have that choice.

Generally it means they are aware of your position (so you don't have to keep explaining yourself over and over) and if you need help, there will be a specially trained person available, and there may be a faster response time or you may be given higher priority. This can only be a good thing!

Enjoy your break. I'm glad you got to hear your kids

meritaten

It simply means that the system sees you as 'Vulnerable' hun. You meet certain criteria and 'lucky you' you will get help from the system!

Kay_Peel

HappySaver1968 wrote: »

what exactly is an Adult Protection officer? I've never heard of them before

I've also asked my nurse if I can return to hospital for at least the foreseeable future as I'm not happy out here and don't have anything - no hope, no job, friends won't get involved with me anymore either because it causes problems between them and their wives/girlfriends who're all friendly with my wife.

John.

I can tell you a bit about Adult Protection, John. (I don't know where you live, so this is just a general view - every council has a different approach).

It's a service for people who are receiving some kind of 'community care' and are finding it difficult to cope independently, in the 'outiside world'. Their lives are being made hell by, for instance, gangs of youths or anti-social neighbours; or else they are being abused by family or carers.

If their social problems - like accommodation, debt, harassment, ill-treatment, relationships etc - can be sorted out with the help of agencies like the police, housing, social services, and others then the service users are better able to get on with their lives without further stress.

You have spoken to your CPN about your desire to go into hospital because you can no longer face the stress of living at your mate's house and being harassed by your wife. Your mental health is suffering because of the strain of these social problems and you see hospital as a refuge and an escape.

The fact is that the escape will only ever be temporary and that those self-same problems will still be there when you return to the world outside hospital. You will be back to square one and that will be so distressing for you. Far better to try and sort out the social problems first - and that's something that Adult Protection Teams may be able to help you do.

You have met with the police officer from the Adult Protection Team and have declined her help. You have said that you are afraid that, by involving the police, you will antagonise your wife and make things worse - but can they be any worse? You are without a home, without company, without money and without hope - and you are in dire need of assistance.

If I were you I would seek another visit from the Adult Protection Officer to look at options for (a)dealing with the harassment from your wife and (b) involving the agencies that can help you with accommodation and access to your children.

Hope that helps.

tankgirl1

Just dropping in to say Hi John, and I'm glad you are getting some help.

pearl123

I also hope you're doing ok. Keep in touch.

meritaten

Kay_Peel wrote: »

I can tell you a bit about Adult Protection, John. (I don't know where you live, so this is just a general view - every council has a different approach).

It's a service for people who are receiving some kind of 'community care' and are finding it difficult to cope independently, in the 'outiside world'. Their lives are being made hell by, for instance, gangs of youths or anti-social neighbours; or else they are being abused by family or carers.

If their social problems - like accommodation, debt, harassment, ill-treatment, relationships etc - can be sorted out with the help of agencies like the police, housing, social services, and others then the service users are better able to get on with their lives without further stress.

You have spoken to your CPN about your desire to go into hospital because you can no longer face the stress of living at your mate's house and being harassed by your wife. Your mental health is suffering because of the strain of these social problems and you see hospital as a refuge and an escape.

The fact is that the escape will only ever be temporary and that those self-same problems will still be there when you return to the world outside hospital. You will be back to square one and that will be so distressing for you. Far better to try and sort out the social problems first - and that's something that Adult Protection Teams may be able to help you do.

You have met with the police officer from the Adult Protection Team and have declined her help. You have said that you are afraid that, by involving the police, you will antagonise your wife and make things worse - but can they be any worse? You are without a home, without company, without money and without hope - and you are in dire need of assistance.

If I were you I would seek another visit from the Adult Protection Officer to look at options for (a)dealing with the harassment from your wife and (b) involving the agencies that can help you with accommodation and access to your children.

Hope that helps.

Kay Peel is right John - the Adult Protection Officer is there to look after you! You have refused thier help, which is your right, but, I would re-think that. You may think of the APO as being more concerned with legal matters and looking for ways to bring law to bear against your wife. In many ways that isnt right - they are there to protect YOUR legal rights! They arent interested in prosecuting anyone - just to help protect you. But, they will do that as a LAST resort!
Kay knows more about this than me - but, John, its YOUR wellbeing which is the focus here - and you now have a team which is focused on getting you well! The APO would be part of that team and would be very helpful, I urge you to rethink hun.
You do KNOW that nothing would be done without your agreement hun? No-one would go against your wishes or your wellbeing.

thatgirlsam

I am so glad you have posted again John.. I think you are really brave

Don't EVER be afraid of asking for help... It shows real courage and strength of character

Bless your mum too... I am 38 and I still need my mum!

Just sending you a ((((hug))))

Stay strong x

rubytuesday

Hello

Just seen this thread today.

Wishing you the best.

It would be beneficial to accept support from the Adult Support Officer I'm sure.

Glad you got to hear your children on loud speaker - that is uplifting isn't it.

HappySaver1968

Hi everyone, just a little update to let you know I'm safe and well and slowly working my way back into a good frame of mind. I have the respite next week which is sorely needed and my mum called my wife again who reluctantly let her speak with the children (without knowing I was there) and mum put the phone on loudspeaker for me to hear them, just hearing their voices is enough for me right now and keeps me going. I love my children so, so much. I also though things over and I'm going to accept all the help I can get because it would be very stupid of me to turn down the help of people who say that they want to help me, and to ensure my safety and well being. Have a good night, many thanks for the overwhelming level of support you've given me. You'll never know how much it means.

John.