Advice for sister-in-law regarding house/divorce please.....

phoebe1989seb

Hi all,

I'm looking for some advice please for my SIL who has recently split up with her husband of four years. When they married he owned a house outright that had been his previous marital home and my SIL didn't want to live there so he agreed to buy a new home for them both and his kids of whom he had custody. The first house was not sold, but rented out and he still owns this.

Unfortunately the new property, for which he paid cash, was also purchased in his name only. Now they have split up - due to his unreasonable behaviour etc - he has offered her a very small lump sum (£15k) and the chance to live in the first house at a cut-price rent. At the moment they are both still living in the second house although I understand he is making things difficult for her in an attempt to get her to leave and accept his offer.

He owns a flourishing business and is not short of money, although during the course of their relationship he has been quite stingy and is also a control freak. My SIL feels she should just take the sum he has offered for an easy life and although she intends to take legal advice I would like to hear what others would advise as my DH (her brother) believes she is entitled to more than this, especially as she has been a mum to his three kids for the last few years.......although I guess this may not be relevant.

I would guess that apart from the value of his business and any other assets he may own, the properties are worth in the region of £500k jointly and as I said there are no charges against these.

Thanks in advance and sorry for the long post!

Phoebe x

suki1001

phoebe1989seb wrote: »

Hi all,

I'm looking for some advice please for my SIL who has recently split up with her husband of four years. When they married he owned a house outright that had been his previous marital home and my SIL didn't want to live there so he agreed to buy a new home for them both and his kids of whom he had custody. The first house was not sold, but rented out and he still owns this.

Unfortunately the new property, for which he paid cash, was also purchased in his name only. Now they have split up - due to his unreasonable behaviour etc - he has offered her a very small lump sum (£15k) and the chance to live in the first house at a cut-price rent. At the moment they are both still living in the second house although I understand he is making things difficult for her in an attempt to get her to leave and accept his offer.

He owns a flourishing business and is not short of money, although during the course of their relationship he has been quite stingy and is also a control freak. My SIL feels she should just take the sum he has offered for an easy life and although she intends to take legal advice I would like to hear what others would advise as my DH (her brother) believes she is entitled to more than this, especially as she has been a mum to his three kids for the last few years.......although I guess this may not be relevant.

I would guess that apart from the value of his business and any other assets he may own, the properties are worth in the region of £500k jointly and as I said there are no charges against these.

Thanks in advance and sorry for the long post!

Phoebe x

I should think if it were me, I'd want to break ties altogether. When you say your SIL has had to be mum to these children do you mean, she was a full time mum to them, or was only able to work part time to care fore them. Also has she contributed financially to the upkeep of the house?

phoebe1989seb

suki1001 wrote: »

I should think if it were me, I'd want to break ties altogether. When you say your SIL has had to be mum to these children do you mean, she was a full time mum to them, or was only able to work part time to care fore them. Also has she contributed financially to the upkeep of the house?

Thanks for your reply suki1001

During their marriage she has not worked as such, although she has helped him out on occasion in his business. She has for the most part since the time they moved in together (back in 2006, about 18 months before they married) been a full-time 'mum' to his three kids who are now teenagers (13, 15 and 17) as he has custody of them. As far as I'm aware (we live some distance away and don't see them very often), she hasn't contributed financially, no and in fact he has I believe paid her an 'allowance' which she now sees as a 'wage' for being housekeeper, childminder etc.....

Based upon the lack of financial input on her part and the fact that both houses remain in his name only, would it be correct to assume that she wouldn't be entitled to anything other than that which he was prepared to offer?

All along my DH (her brother) said she should have insisted the house (the new one at least) was put into joint names, but for whatever reason this never happened.

She is currently of the opinion that she would rather not live in a house belonging to him and be paying rent to him as the last thing she feels like doing is giving him money!

I would be grateful for any other opinions or advice please.

Phoebe x

RedFraggle

She is probably entitled to alot more than 15k because they were married and she looked after his kids. It isn't always a straightforward 50:50 split but I think he may be chancing his arm trying to get her accept something without seeking advice. She should definately seek legal advice, some solicitors will do a free 30 min preliminary consult. Is some info on the net also such as here: http://www.divorceaid.co.uk/financial/index2.html

PS: my DH just came in whilst I had that page up, you should have seen his face!

sonastin

As I understand it, if you give up the opportunity to earn your own money in order to (keep house, care for family, etc) carry out unpaid work within the relationship because the other party's wage is enough to keep you both, you are entitled to a reasonable share in return for your input, despite that input not having a direct monetary value. She should definitely seek legal advice and not just roll over and accept anything he offers.

[Deleted User]

I agree.., if she goes to a solicitor and seeks advice.., I am almost certain she will find she will be free of the need to live in one of her ex's houses but also receive a more generous cash payment. Obviously her ex is not offering the £15k out of generosity.., he is a businessman first and foremost and is looking for a deal. Accepting anything he offers without seeking proper legal advice is not a good idea to put it mildly.

pimento

"All my worldy goods with thee I share."

Doesn't that apply?

lime1996

Going on personal experience she needs to see a solicitor as soon as possible. She has only been married four years so she may not be entitled to much. Going on what you have written she has not had any children with this guy, so her claims may not be as strong.

I doubt she would walk away with 50% of the property as she is not on the deeds or mortgage and she has no minors to support from their marriage. He could claim she gave up work was her own decision.

Good luck and I hope you are able to sort it out.

RAS

Agreed. She needs to see a solicitor. This is not a short marriage (legal defination) so she is entitled to something. If she worked before they go togather, I would argue that she should get at least as much a a live nanny would have been paid over the five years.

BitterAndTwisted

When splitting up after a marriage of "short duration" (normally two years or less) the courts will often seek to return each partner to the position they were in before marriage. This marriage was not short and she gave up her opportunity to earn a salary to look after his children. Working from time to time in his business is also significant. Therefore I think her claim on his assets would be greater. His offer of £15k in cash and still to be tied to him for renting the first property is derisory, and he probably knows that. She should seek professional advice at the earliest opportunity.

poppysarah

BitterAndTwisted wrote: »

His offer of £15k in cash and still to be tied to him for renting the first property is derisory, and he probably knows that. She should seek professional advice at the earliest opportunity.

She should seek advice.
But 15k and walking away completely from this person is probably the sanest move she could make.

The kids will presumably miss her and may want to stay in touch, but he sounds like a PITA and she is best rid of him as quickly and easily as possible.