Finally reaching out for some help...

psychopathbabble

Wow that looks AMAZING!! See, this is the sort of stuff I want to be able to do.... living in debt all the time has prevented me from doing so many things like this.

PinotGrigio41

kerri_dfw wrote: »

Right, so I apparently don't put myself first or do anything for myself..... so I've just remembered that for the past 3 years I've been wanting to do a trek America tour from Seattle down to Las Vegas through the Grand Canyon and several national parks. So... I am going to tell the OH that we have to move in together so I can afford to go on my dream holiday. That is me being selfish, I think if I've wanted to do it for the past 3 years then I should jolly well get to do it as soon as he finishes right?

This is the trek:
http://www.trekamerica.co.uk/tours/mts.html I've suddenly got all excited about it again

I used to work for trek america many many years ago............got to zip off right now, DD2s tooth jsut fallen out , but I will be back on the trekking subject at a later date !!!

kerri_dfw

Ooh Pinot you can give me hints and tips on that then.

I would like to announce that I've had a MAJOR break-through with the OH. He's agreed to move in with me in September he's going to come and stay in London when he gets back from Canada, then we're going to get a lovely apartment overlooking the bay with seaviews in Cardiff. The apartments are very much yuppie places, but they have master with ensuite, open plan living/dining, and will be lovely to live in for a year. I can go to the WI there and already know the president, so I can still do my knitting & sewing, and OH will have a whole load of pressure taken off because he won't be worrying about money

I know it might seem like I'm bending over backwards for him, but he makes me happy and it's in my nature to help other people. All I want is to start my life as a family, that starts with him, he is going to do his final year then get a job. I'll start saving for a mortgage whilst he pays off his debts, then he'll help with the mortgage deposit and we'll find a way for both of us to have paid equally for it. Then when we've got the house, that means babies yay!!! I love having a plan!

I'm off to Woking today, to a data centre in the middle of nowhere that doesn't even have a canteen so I need to get some sarnies from somewhere, oh joy! But at least it gets me out of the house

HappyNow

I'm really pleased to hear your plans are coming together, you deserve it.

As for 'bending over backwards for him', that's what being a couple is all about. So next year it may be your turn to take the heavy end, but in a few years time the roles may be reversed; he may end up earning more money and/or working longer hours when you start your family. And when you mention finding a way for you both to pay equally for the house, I don't feel you need to worry about that too much either. There's more to a relationship than finances and as long as you're both equally commited to the relationship the rest will work out fine. Actually it would be a MAJOR co-incidence if two people could bring identical things to any relationship.

Good luck with everything x

psychopathbabble

I don't even really see you bending over backwards... yes you are accomodating his needs, but luckily your job means you are able to relocate fairly easily. And you aren't overly happy with your life in London so you aren't losing anything.

Don't worry about justifying things to anyone Do what is right for you! x

fallenwiccan

kerri_dfw wrote: »

Ooh Pinot you can give me hints and tips on that then.

I would like to announce that I've had a MAJOR break-through with the OH. He's agreed to move in with me in September he's going to come and stay in London when he gets back from Canada, then we're going to get a lovely apartment overlooking the bay with seaviews in Cardiff. The apartments are very much yuppie places, but they have master with ensuite, open plan living/dining, and will be lovely to live in for a year. I can go to the WI there and already know the president, so I can still do my knitting & sewing, and OH will have a whole load of pressure taken off because he won't be worrying about money

I know it might seem like I'm bending over backwards for him, but he makes me happy and it's in my nature to help other people. All I want is to start my life as a family, that starts with him, he is going to do his final year then get a job. I'll start saving for a mortgage whilst he pays off his debts, then he'll help with the mortgage deposit and we'll find a way for both of us to have paid equally for it. Then when we've got the house, that means babies yay!!! I love having a plan!

I'm off to Woking today, to a data centre in the middle of nowhere that doesn't even have a canteen so I need to get some sarnies from somewhere, oh joy! But at least it gets me out of the house

YAY the flat sounds lovely, in fact it sounds incredibly like mine (except I don't have a fantastic view of that beautiful bay) I didn't think we would need the en suite but it is very handy to have. I love ours so much its just big enough, no room to fill it with junk. My OH adjusted to me location wise (and giving me his car too) so we all do it.

kerri_dfw

I totally posted a post yesterday it's disappeared, maybe I forgot to press save oops!

Thanks for the comments ladies, I am definitely on the side of "well it all comes round in the end" and that if I were the same as him life would be dull. Anyway, someone will have to pay the bills whilst I'm off with the babies in a few years time

I've put another £155 away for paying off the OD today, so I now have £210 towards it yippee getting there slowly. Expenses landed, hence the payment. CC replacement has arrived and requires activation, that is to be used for business purposes only

I'm going to be getting some serious girlfriend points this year just booked a restaurant for OH's birthday. It's a vegetarian indian restaurant in Cardiff that will accommodate all of his friends I've planned it well in advance so hopefully most of them can make it. Going to take him flat hunting during the day, then suggest we grab some food in the evening, and go to this restaurant where all his friends will be waiting It's very MSE as well as you can get a complete meal for £6.25 and take your own booze too yippeee.

kerri_dfw

Tall ceilings were not made with changing lightbulbs in mind were they? I've just had to change 3 lightbulbs, I have two more to do but they will have to wait. I had to stand on my super high bed, right on the end, then I had to stand on tippy toes hoping not to fall off. The landshade itself is a hanging down one with 5 fittings, and is at least 2 ft from the ceiling, so you see how tall the room is! Anyway, I can now see properly in this room, or I will be when I stop having lights flash in front of my eyes from looking up at the light to make sure all the bulbs work!

I still don't have everything ready for the craft fair, I might start panicking shortly =/ but at least my room is now a night daylight bright, rather than a dusky dim. I'm sure I'm affected by how much light there is in the room, ever since I got the new side lamp I've felt lots happier.

Finance news... urm £160 sat in the current account, £160 sat in the lloy account building up for paying off the OD, £70 sat in my purse because I don't want to break a £50 even though I know I need to put it in the bank. £335 remaining on my credit card, I need to pay off the £164 I've spent whilst I was waiting for expenses, but will pay this on payday just to be on the safe side. I will get some money in my pay packet which covers the tax back on mileage, so that can be used should be at least what's currently owed to the card. All spending on the card is now strictly for work purposes, this way I can keep track of what I am being paid extra in mileage that I am not spending in fuel.

So available to me at the moment I have £560 if I count the cc as "available funds", I don't remember the last time this was the case. Normally I like to spend everything straight away, but we're over halfway through the month and I have money leftover...wow what is happening to me?!

RosaBernicia

kerri_dfw wrote: »

...we're over halfway through the month and I have money leftover...wow what is happening to me?!

'S good isn't it? :j Congratulations :T

This is why I'm tracking my 'net status' now rather than total debt owed. I know that I've got a couple of hundred quid stashed for holidays, car, gifts etc that I could reshuffle if I really had to, but I don't want to because it feels soooo much nicer to move funds across instead of watching the debt go up and down all the time. Now I know I am organised and the debt is making steady progress.


Rosa xx

ZTD

kerri_dfw wrote: »

Tall ceilings were not made with changing lightbulbs in mind were they? I've just had to change 3 lightbulbs, I have two more to do but they will have to wait. I had to stand on my super high bed, right on the end, then I had to stand on tippy toes hoping not to fall off.

Don't they have those things we call "stepladders" down South?

Much safer...