Asking my dh to clear me debts

painted_lady

In our house finances are totally our own. We pay half of the bills for house/child when it arrives each, so works out equal, but everything else is our own. I have my own savings, investments, debt, OH has his. I would never ask him to clear my debts because they are none of his business. However, you have a different system in place. Its totally your decision, but does he know about the debt? If you do ask him, I would show him that you have learnt to budget, you realise its a mistake and will not happen again.
Good luck.

nickyhutch

I agree completely with pot o' gold. You're married, you're a team, that's the point of being together.

handbagfetish

I don't think I can offer any more than has been said already but maybe if you find it difficult to talk to OH about this then you could show him your post. When he reads it I'm sure he will realise how bad this situation is making you feel and he will be more than happy to help.

Our OHs aren't mind readers, he probably doesn't realise you feel this way.
I had a similar conversation with my BF a week or so ago and I ended up saving myself £500! It was such a relief.

Good luck & keep us informed.
HBF

raymond

Sound like you need marriage guidance more than financial guidance.

wannasavemoney

My twopenny worth: Marriage is a partnership. whoever is earning either one or both it should all go in the same pot and BOTH partners decide after all expenses etc are paid, who needs what to live on. Until recently i was the main wage earner now my dh is. It was never a case of this much is mine and you can have this much from me as housekeeping. it was always all together. It may be that what your oh 'gives' you towards housekeeping or whatever, may not be enough to housekeep? If you pooled together, it would probably be a lot easier to budget. A good talk is probably what is needed here. If you incur a debt then it is also his debt. It seems that you can afford not to get into debt in the first place but you need to do it together.

DEBTFREEWANNABE_6

Good Luck Lisa

anniestar

Lisa, you are a married couple with a child. You both lived on "your" wages when in the Middle East so I just cannot see any problem whatsoever in your DH paying "your?" debts. Like a OP said I bet the debt wasn't run up on stuff just for yourself. You are part of a team. No problem. Incidently DH is here and totally agrees with me(wise man!!!!) Good luck hun.

richardvc

I have an idea which could satisfy both camps !!

Why not ask your husband to pay off your debt which you will repay into a separate savings account - when you have finished paying use this money for you ALL to enjoy ie a holiday, something special for the house etc etc

That way you have saved interest on the original debts, accrued interest on your savings and learnt the real value of money which will make a fantastic contribution to your family.

In my book, everyone's a winner ! Good idea or not ??