Help - up to my eyeballs in debt!

saintygal

Hiya,
I'm new to this site, only discovered it by accident today!
I'm up to my eyeballs in debt and not sure what to do!
Ive got a huge personal loan, which I'm going to be paying off for the next 6 years, a student loan, a car under finance and credit card debts - totalling about £30,000!
I am, admittedly, a shopaholic, and find it hard to budget, I live way above and beyond my means, and things have just spiralled out of control.
I've been to citizens advice and they advised me to think about claiming bankruptcy, which absolutely terrifies me!
I don't really want my partner, family and friends to know how much of a mess I'm in either.
Anyone got any advice please?!

reecos

Ok, first things first, welcome to the boards and don't panic!

There are loads of great people on here that can help and I'm sure that some will be along soon to give advise and help.

In the meantime have a read of the Stickies at the top of the board (especially SouthernScousers First Time Posters Thread) and put together a SOA - that will give everyone more of an idea of how they can help.

Mizz_Pink

Hi,

First of all I think you should be open with your partner if nobody else. The burden of keeping this from him will only add to your stress and worry. If he is a decent man then he will show some sympathy and practical advice to help you improve your circumstances.

can you move your cc'd onto 0% balances or low balances for life ?

can you return the car or sell it privatly and pay off the finance, then use public transport ? or share lift to work ?

Also start a spending diary to show where your money goes, write down if you buy a paper or a sandwich. When I worked at Boots I spent £100 a month in Boots alone :eek:

If you are a shopaholic then you need to change your habits and lifestyle, do you work in a town cnetre or near shops ? Do you have hobbies at the weekend. I love to shop but me and hubby go Matalan if we need clothes or have a browe around Fosse Park, if I need something he will normally treat me.

Do an Soa too, see the sticky at the top of the board.

Good luck and welcome to MSE :wave:

Triker

Hello and welcome, we are here to help and point you in the right direction.


Many will guide you with practical advice, please post your SOA as explain above, others like myself will support you like this :hello: and by letting you know that you are not alone.

Keep going and good luck.

chevalier

Are you currently meeting you minimum repayments? Is your credit score good? If yes to both of these then you could maybe look at balance transferring the debt on the credit cards to one with a low life of balance apr.

BUT you have to cut up the new card when it comes, else there is the temptation to just spend a little bit on it, and then you can end up in a worse position.

Do you know why you 'like' spending beyond your means. If there is an underlying issue as to why you spend, then you need to tackle this as well as your debts.

You may find keeping a spending diary a way of starting to take control of your spending. You write in there EVERYTHING you spend each (except utility mortgage spend). You may be amazed by what you find you spend on after doing this for a month or so !
best of luck
chev

Tr@cker

With record numbers of personal bankrupcy no reason to be terrified-its becoming common though if the institutions want us to be responsible borrowers they're going to have to lead the way and show us that THEY are responsible lenders.
I agree you should first tell your partner about it-the first step-then work thru the areas where you can save. Not as daunting as you might think at present but you can turn it around. Just be honest with those close to you.

sarah3891

I keep seeing the term SOA everywhere, and although I think it's a breakdown of monthly spending, what does this acronym actually stand for?!?!? IS there an abbreviation dictionary on the site anywhere as I never know what people mean half the time with things like 'OH' 'DD' (not as in Direct debit!!!) etc etc?!

Thanks,

Sarah

briona

sarah3891 wrote:

I keep seeing the term SOA everywhere, and although I think it's a breakdown of monthly spending, what does this acronym actually stand for?!?!? IS there an abbreviation dictionary on the site anywhere as I never know what people mean half the time with things like 'OH' 'DD' (not as in Direct debit!!!) etc etc?!

Thanks,

Sarah

Hi Sarah

SOA = Statement of Affairs, and it's basically all your incomings, outgoings, debts etc... just your current financial situation really! It took me a while to cotton on too but you get there!

Other commonly used ones are:
OH = Other Half
DD = Dear/Darling Daughter
DS = Dear/Darling Son
DH = Dear/Darling Husband

That's all I can think of for now but I'm sure others will add more in due course...

Ooh was gonna say HTH here... which means Hope That Helps!

Briona

Triker

Sorry it means statement of affairs, all is revealed here.http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=107280

abbecer

Welcome saintygal. You're certainly come to the right place for help. Everyone on here will offer you financial advice and emotional support. Even though you're situation is very bad it won't seem so daunting once you take control.

Huggles and snuggles

Rebecca x

Nelle_2

First of all admit to your partner. I was in the same boat - I have about £50k worth of credit card debts and whils my partner knew I had some he didn't know to what extent and the longer it went on the worse I felt and the more interest was piling on. I don't even know how it got to that much as i only had about £8k to start with but I transferred to 0% cards and as the interest rates increased it all got out of control. I thought my partner would probably leave and although he was a litttle upset to begin with - he has been very supportive and I can now get up in the morning without worrying if he will open the mail. I wrote everything down so I knew the full extent of loans, credit cards, overdraft etc. I wrote to the credit card companies advising that I could no longer afford the minimum payments and making them lower offers. some agreed immediately, others took a little more persuading and a couple were having none of it. I was offered an IVA but felt unfcomfortable about it so decided to release the equity in my property as i don't want to lose my home. I will be paying a new mortgage for the next 15 years but i am now worry free. If you can't do this - try speaking to a non profit making debt solution company - there are links on this site. They may be able to offer a DDP - they arrange amicable payments and get interest and fees frozen.
The most important thing is that you know you are in trouble. I buried my head in the sand for too long and built my debts up even further.
Good luck - and if your partner deserves you - you will be understood and supported.