Need some advice regarding housing

myboysmum

I have been a member here for a long time but just under a different username; sorry I just registered with a new one; I need a bit of personal advice and didnt want it being associated with my other username.
Basically, I am married with 2 kids (boys 7,12), living in Housing Association property where my husband is a main tennant on our tenancy agreement and me and the kids are occupiers as living with him. I work part-time, he full time. He assaulted me on Saturday, I was taken to hospital with face injuries and he was taken by Police to police station. As he assaulted his wife in his previous marriage, they obviously taking that into account and it is very likely that he will have to spend some time in prison. Now - my problem is, that he is a main tenant on our house and apparently me and children will have to move out and become homeless as we have no right to stay in the property unless he agrees what is very unlikely in the current situation. I really want to stay in our home as the boys have schools around and it is our family home. I phoned the HA regarding the house and they asked me to write a letter explaining what happened and until the outcome of the court, we can stay in the property if I pay the rent.
I would like to know if I have a right to apply for any occupier right or transferring tenancy if he goes to prison as I read somewhere that family law based on children's act can overwrite housing law. I don't really have money to go and pay to solicitors as we have some debts which are all on my name so now I will have to pay all that myself and even child benefit went to his account where I dont have access. I am in a difficult situation, but can cope with the debts; the worse would be if we have to move the house. Please someone advise me what rights I have. Thank you. We lived here nearly 5 years.

4Chickens

I am no expert in this area but this is what I think:

If your husband is no longer living with you or allowed to live with you then you need to tell the child benefit, tax credits, council tax etc people this as soon as possible. If you don't have an address for him then maybe you can give them the crime reference number along with your explanation as to what has happened.
You need to get that child benefit paid into your bank as soon as possible along with any other benefits that are currently being paid into his bank account.
Go to see Citizens Advice and or Womens Aid ASAP. They will help you sort out the benefits you should be entitled to, the legal process and any other help you may require.
I know that this advice sounds vague but under the circumstances, the quicker you can get your finances and security sorted out, the sooner you can move on from this terrible experience. There are load of lovely people on MSE who will be along soon with some more detailed advice.
Good luck myboysmum

debtfreenewbie

Cant help much but wanted to send you some hugs.It is a horrid situation you are in.I am sure your ha will not evict you,just write to them quickly.
I have been in a violent relationship and good on you for not putting up with it.
Wish you all the best and keep posting...

CH27

Women's Aid will be able to give you some excellent advice about housing etc.

myboysmum

Yeah; it was really hard; I put up with it for years and in a way I am even glad that finally it is recorded officially. My husband was very controlling man and we all three had a lot of mental abuse (+ me - physical and sexual) so in a way I am ok. I am only very tired and bruised outside and inside but can cope and ready to close that chapter of my life. I only need this home as the boys have all lives here. I work part-time but I am off at the moment so need to sort all what i need. Spoke to child benefit today; it takes ages to change the claim but I ask for the pack already. Thank you. Please if someone know what to do regarding official rights in the house let me know. I am worried also that if I start paying rent now and in few weeks we have to move out and become homeless - in that case I would prefer not to pay rent (as it is in his name) and better keep money for later as I will need it.

myboysmum

I have an appointment with Victim's support tomorrow so hopefully I will get advice I need. Thank you all so much.

CH27

Are you sure you want to stay in the house with it's bad memories?
Would a fresh start not be better for you all?

myboysmum

I definitely want to stay in the house as the house is the home I created and the boys love it too. We had 5 years of life here and I have childcare scheeme just next door where boys spend time during holidays, schools, shops, buses... around.
Yeah, I definitely need to stay here as I have so many problems rigth now - lot of money problems; and as here we all have already set up; we can just pick up pieces of our lives and carry on. I don't have strenght to move out... and I have to be strong for the boys now as I have no family or friends around

4Chickens

myboysmum

The housing association are not going to throw you out of your home.
Keep paying the rent and keep the receipts. Even though the tenancy agreement in his name only, you have a right to take over the tenancy as his wife.
If you think about it logically, how many women and children are thrown out on the street when there is a marriage breakdown? None, except in extremely complicated circumstances, where there is huge rent arrears etc.
You have nothing to worry about, talk to womens aid but before you do:
MAKE A LIST OF ALL YOUR QUESTIONS
WRITE DOWN THE ANSWERS, INCLUDING PHONE NUMBERS, ADDRESSES AND FORMS THAT YOU NEED

Good Luck honey and don't worry about the stuff you can't control, just concentrate on getting all your ducks in a row and let as many people as possible know of your change of circumstances, this includes your debts. Ask them to give you a couple of months to get things sorted. If they refuse, well tough, don't pay them until you can.
Stay strong and take care

myboysmum

Oh Thanks 4Chickens, you made me cry... Thank you I hope you are right. Yes, if we can stay here we will be all right. I will make it and so will my boys. Thank again for great words of encouragement and advice.

jackyann

Stay for the time being, as advised above. Victim Support & Women's Aid are excellent. Most areas have some sort of multi-agency forum on domestic abuse, where health, police, social services, housing etc. liaise. It is almost always the case that the abuser (even when the tenancy is in his name) gets told to stay away and you keep the house.
They are also very sympathetic to whether you want to stay (kids used to the area, like the school, local networks) or move (fresh start) although some of that depends on availability of housing in your area.
Stay strong & good luck