Husband reduced overdraft, expects me to take debt on

missamoo

pimento wrote: »

I'd be delivering his three children to his mother's house for him to look after and get myself a job.

the split is due to social services being involved. He isn't allowed contact with the children except supervised.

missamoo

Thanks for all the comments. even the unhelpful ones. to that I can only say he wasn't like that when I married him.

Firstly, we have no savings. £50 was going from the current account to the savings account once a month, that was the £350 that he put back in the current account. That's all the savings there was.

I opened a single account in my name a year ago when I had a suspicion something like this might happen. the Child Benefit has been going into that account for a while - I 'forgot' to put it back in the joint account. I have applied for all the necessary benefits, have contacted CSA and will be applying for DLA etc for my daughter but as yet I don't have a diagnosis so it's going to be difficult. I have a solicitor but am having trouble getting her to phone me back.

My biggest question really is what is my position legally to the debt on the bank account. he wants me to put £250 in the account and then he'll put £250 in. i don't think so!!!

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Nope, don't put a penny in it. But tell the bank the account is to be frozen - after all, he could reduce the credit limit, so you must be able to at least do that. Whilst it is in debit, he has no credit score of his own and he won't be able to get anywhere else to live, so will be living with his mum in middle age. (Or will move on to some other poor woman who has a home)


As he's obviously not to be trusted round your children - as per social services - just don't have any contact with him. Leave it to solicitors. Depriving you of money intentionally to deprive your children of food, heat and light counts as domestic abuse to me.

dirtysexymonkey

missamoo wrote: »

Thanks for all the comments. even the unhelpful ones. to that I can only say he wasn't like that when I married him.

Firstly, we have no savings. £50 was going from the current account to the savings account once a month, that was the £350 that he put back in the current account. That's all the savings there was.

I opened a single account in my name a year ago when I had a suspicion something like this might happen. the Child Benefit has been going into that account for a while - I 'forgot' to put it back in the joint account. I have applied for all the necessary benefits, have contacted CSA and will be applying for DLA etc for my daughter but as yet I don't have a diagnosis so it's going to be difficult. I have a solicitor but am having trouble getting her to phone me back.

My biggest question really is what is my position legally to the debt on the bank account. he wants me to put £250 in the account and then he'll put £250 in. i don't think so!!!

why not? its in your best interests to do this. was the overdraft used to fund his fripperies or did it go on living for all of you?

legally you are both responsible, jointly and separately for the debt. while it remains unpaid it will affect your credit scores so if hes offering to pay half of whats left (having already paid more than you of the total amount) then you should take it.

princessdreamer

dirtysexymonkey wrote: »

why not? its in your best interests to do this. was the overdraft used to fund his fripperies or did it go on living for all of you?

legally you are both responsible, jointly and separately for the debt. while it remains unpaid it will affect your credit scores so if hes offering to pay half of whats left (having already paid more than you of the total amount) then you should take it.

Erm because she has the children to feed and look after. I paid all the debts left by the ex when he spent our money on his slapper BUT he should have made the effort as he spent the money. Net result the children and I spent time living hand to mouth while he went clubbing with her.

peachyprice

missamoo wrote: »

My biggest question really is what is my position legally to the debt on the bank account. he wants me to put £250 in the account and then he'll put £250 in. i don't think so!!!

The debt is as much yours as it is his though. What does he want you to put the money in there for? Is it to reduce the overdraft further so that the account can be closed or so that his name can be taken off, or is it so he can spend that money?

At the moment the bank will not close the account and will not transfer it into one name, despite what he may tell you that form is for. I suspect he's asked them to put the account in your name, they've said they can't until the OD is cleared, hence he wants you to pay money in.

It is in your own interest to get this account closed, or at the very least frozen, at the moment he can still rack up more debt on it that you will be equally liable for even if you don't spend a penny of it.

You need to speak to the bank and explain that you want the account frozen and come to an agreement to reduce the OD, otherwise you're leaving yourself in a very vulnerable position.

dirtysexymonkey

princessdreamer wrote: »

Erm because she has the children to feed and look after. I paid all the debts left by the ex when he spent our money on his slapper BUT he should have made the effort as he spent the money. Net result the children and I spent time living hand to mouth while he went clubbing with her.

your situation is not comparable with the ops. your letting your bitterness cloud your mind.

there was £1500 of debt.

£350 paid off out of savings - the right thing to do.
oh paid it down to £500 and is ready to pay half the rest of it.

so of the £1500 debt the op only has to pay £250. thats a bargain! or she could just let her credit rating be shot to !!!! cos she doesnt want to pay her own debts!

January20

clearingout wrote: »

it sounds like early days so CSA involvement is unlikely. You can leave the overdraft and start up a new account elsewhere (assuming you can get a new account) and have all your benefits transferred over to that. The overdraft will then just sit there. Both of you will be 'chased' to pay although it is likely they will chase the person who responds to them more than the person who ignores them. You can offer to pay back at a small amount each week/month - the CAB would help you with this, I think. I have to say, my ex and I ignored our joint overdraft and it eventually went to debt collectors and was finally paid when the house was sold. Yes, it trashes your credit rating.

I wouldn't, personally, use any savings to pay it off at this point - but that's a judgement call you need to make and it's about what makes you comfortable. It all depends on whether or not you intend to get a mortgage in the immediate future and just how much you value your credit rating vs. having a small pot of money to fall back on if you need to. I personally preferred the money to fall back on but if you can't sleep at night with the overdraft sitting there, just use the savings to pay it back!

Re: going to the CSA - if he's self employed and working cash in hand you don't stand a hope in hell of getting any money through them. You need to try and come to an arrangement with him - and learn not to rely on maintenance money for paying for essentials. Sorry - not what you wanted to hear. As it stands, he doesn't sound like he has much conscience so this may be an on-going struggle for you. Have a look on the child support board for further assistance with this.

I agree with opening a new account. If you can't open a normal savings account because of credit rating problems you can open a basic savings account.

I can see one big problem with starting to pay off the overdraft: You ex's name is still on the account which means you could pay off the overdraft and he could well come along and take all the money out again. I'd sit tight on it and ignore the bank's demands for the moment. Any money you may have you need for your children.

dirtysexymonkey

January20 wrote: »

I agree with opening a new account. If you can't open a normal savings account because of credit rating problems you can open a basic savings account.

I can see one big problem with starting to pay off the overdraft: You ex's name is still on the account which means you could pay off the overdraft and he could well come along and take all the money out again. I'd sit tight on it and ignore the bank's demands for the moment. Any money you may have you need for your children.

unless she signs the forms and closes the account.;)

if he was going to do that why would he be the one to pay over a grand off it and reduce the balance?

DS4215

OP - freeze the bank account and then suggest to ex that you both pay off x per month (whatever you can afford) and immediately the od limit drops by that amount. So if you owe £500 and you both pay off £20 the od limit drops to £460. That way you are both paying off your debts and neither of you can do over the other by running it back up again...