How do i complain that a credit card company hasn't been a responsible lender

Atom

Im going to start making minimum payments on my cc's - maybe i will get an increase

Bouncy_2

Also, and this is possibly off topic a bit - I am wondering if there is an underlying cause for your husband's behaviour, both the living beyond his means and his lying to you

eschaton

Divorce is an option - can you trust a partner that runs up £25k debt without telling you?

Responsible Lender should mean the same as Responsible Borrower.

Outlook isn't good. He used up the extra £2k credit in less than a year. Not only is there £25k plus interest to pay back but there is £25k of overspending to reduce first.

bobajob_1966

eschaton wrote: »

Divorce is an option - can you trust a partner that runs up £25k debt without telling you?

I have to admit, this was my first thought also!

Bouncy wrote: »

Also, and this is possibly off topic a bit - I am wondering if there is an underlying cause for your husband's behaviour, both the living beyond his means and his lying to you

That would be the condition known as burying head in the sand.

thegoodman

Don't go for the divorce without looking into other things
What is happened to all this money?
Was he trying to keep everyone in the family happy by holiday etc?
Was most if not all of the money spend on your family?
You have said he was spending money on food etc? Have you paid your share or was it paying everything? You also said while he was paying you were saving.
Are you paying your share or is he paying most to run the family?
May be you pushed him into paying for most things while you were saving?
May be he is a nice person and feel he has to pay for most things?
I have seen a few family were one person is paying for most things because the partner is being pushed.
Was it buying expensive things like tv, computers etc?
Have you questioned him about where all these money is coming from?
Where you ok with him buying all things as long as your money was ok?


If you don't have the answers or if your response is negative than you also need to take some responsibility. The family only work if both of you are helping each other
Devoice is fine if he is leaving double life or into things which you are not aware of.

Brodiebobs

I understand some of the posts were harsh, but TBH i think deserved. If i found myself in that position i'd be looking for help to resolve it not jump on the compensation wagon, trying to pass the blame to the companies.
You need to speak to him and find out how its happened, surely you must have noticed he was using his cards to fund essentials like food??? and if this was the case why did he have to do this and where was the rest of his money going?
How were your finances run before as i guess you didnt have access to his accounts if you had no knowledge?
Debt free forums will be a massive help, as would a honest conversation with yourself and your husband about the true state of your affairs, if you could afford holidays etc, maybe he was burying his head to keep up with your expectations.

thegoodman

Most money problems are caused by both partners unless one is leaving double life.
I think she is expecting too much from him, like expensive holiday or outings.
Already said in the post he was paying to run the family..paying for food etc.
No where in the post she said she also paid her share, 50:50 or any number to run the family

darkangel2828

Just to answer a few questions...

I work part time due to having a little girl to look after and studying a degree with the OU, and he is self employed.

We had a joint account for household expenses,... Mortgage, bills I paid £750 into this a month and husband £600....

I work on a Saturday and thats when he does the weekly shop and pays cash,... (or so I thought) ...

I know he's hidden this to 'protect' me, and he just wants to make me happy,... I just wish he'd have known that I don't need protecting and I could have handled his debt 10 years ago when we were dating...

Again to my 'haters' it really wasn't my intension to offend or jump on the comp bandwagon.... It really is one element that crossed my mind.... Amongst my initial anger towards my husband, I was also angry, I guess with the way the financial world works....
Of course I'm reviewing our finances, trying to get more hours at work, getting him to face reality, cut what little luxury we had in our lives, put my small Christmas fund into paying some outstanding bills, etc... I'm not stupid.... I know we both need to wake up and small the coffee/ roses, whatever....

And if this forum posting hasn't put me off MSE for life (lol) then maybe you'll see me on debt free wannabes!

bengal-stripe

darkangel2828 wrote: »

.......Amongst my initial anger towards my husband, I was also angry, I guess with the way the financial world works....

It is possible, your husband has not only told you, but also the Credit Cards a few porkies, just to be able to continue
with his high-spending lifestyle.

nearlyrich

I would just like to say the be nice to other moneysavers applies on this board too, OP is in in shock and not being used to the ways of CC companies is asking a fair question.

DarkAngel please post on the DFW board with a full SOA and I am sure you will get lots of support from people who have been in your situation and lots of advice on how to get back on the right track....