Why/how is it selfish if you don't want to invite others to your own wedding?

nykied

Idiophreak wrote: »

To be devil's advocate: They'd be happy and you'd be gutted. Apparently they wouldn't care about you being gutted, as long as they were happy...Is that not selfish?

My parents and my OH's parents have all said that we shouldn't have a big wedding and if we wanted to go off and get married, they'd be fine with that. I'm not convinced though...

Idiophreak

shellsuit wrote: »

No, as they wouldn't know I were gutted. I wouldn't tell them or show them as I wouldn't want to put them on a guilt trip.

There are two different scenarios.

1) they say "we're thinking about just going to get married without you". Then you can either throw a barmy, say "well, if that's what you want" and be inwardly gutted - but at least they'll have asked for your thoughts.

2) they just go off and do it, it shows that they just don't care how you feel about it.