Why/how is it selfish if you don't want to invite others to your own wedding?

Lilypie_2

This word seems to come up quite a lot whenever someone discusses the option of having a no guests/very few guests wedding.
Why?

Sunshine12

I dont think its selfish at all. I reckon its entirely up to the couple.

ellies_angel

we just got married the two of us and no-one has said we were selfish, everyone was really happy for them. Those who think you are, are being selfish, because they are thinking of themselves and not you. If they love you, they will be happy for you

Torry_Quine

I wouldn't say it's selfish per se, it's entirely up to the couple themselves. However there will be people who will be disappointed.

Hollie84

Its your day invite who YOU want there.people seem to think when its a wedding they have the god given right to to interfere and have a good old rant about who they think should be there

Winter_Jasmine

It's not! We got married on our own last Summer in Vegas - exactly as we wanted. It wasn't about excluding people, just that neither of us like attention and we didn't have the money to invite everyone (the holiday was mostly paid for with Tesco points!). Our families and friends were all very happy for us, thankfully. I sometimes think it's selfish to invite loads of people to a big wedding - by the time guests have paid for a present, outfits, hotels etc you can be asking them to pay hundreds of pounds. Each to their own I say, I'm very happy to spend a day celebrating with a couple if that's what they want but I'm equally happy for them if they choose to go it alone

TamVilla80

Its completely up to the couple, but personally we couldn't. I would have loved to just taken our parents to Vegas and got married by Elvis, but I couldn't have got married where my oh's Nan & Grandad couldnt see their only grandson get married, or my niece couldnt have been our bridesmaid, etc. I think that not only is a wedding about the love that you and your partner share, but it's also thanking your nearest and dearest for the support they give you in your relationship. But that's just mho, each to their own!

coolcait

Lilypie wrote: »

This word seems to come up quite a lot whenever someone discusses the option of having a no guests/very few guests wedding.
Why?

Does it? :huh:

wanchai_2

TamVilla80 wrote: »

Its completely up to the couple, but personally we couldn't. I would have loved to just taken our parents to Vegas and got married by Elvis, but I couldn't have got married where my oh's Nan & Grandad couldnt see their only grandson get married, or my niece couldnt have been our bridesmaid, etc. I think that not only is a wedding about the love that you and your partner share, but it's also thanking your nearest and dearest for the support they give you in your relationship. But that's just mho, each to their own!

+1

We did consider going abroad (fab scenery/weather etc), but once I realised that lots of friends/family wouldn't make it (for financial/health reasons), I just said no way. I'm glad that we're having it at home with our nearest and dearest there. It may rain and it may not be glam, but for me it's about the company, not the location.

But I agree 100% - each to their own, and nobody should make you feel bad for doing your wedding your way!!!

trinity_enigma

I don't think the word selfish come up that often but I think sometimes it is implied by family members etc of the happy couple.

It's also implied occasionally on here to people who choose not to have children at their wedding.

Personally, I have been called selfish by my dad when I showed him our rough guestlist and I hadn't alotted him x number of guests- bare in mind it was a rough list to give us a guide of numbers and although he had offered to help with te cost of the wedding we hadn't accepted.

Honestly- families are the worst when it comes to weddings! Lol

mum2one

not just weddings.... I had a 40th birthday lunch, ended up offending cousin and her hubby as I didn't invite their children, as they were put out that my own daughter was there and shes the same age as her one child!, this in term offended another cousin (same family) as I didn't invite him, he made a decison 6 years that he doesn't want to do birthdays or christmas etc, that then upset my aunt, as her grandchild hadn't been invited she didn't go....

All this over the fact that I had not invited children, it was a family and friends sunday lunch, and bar my daughter, there was no other children.... my verdict, sod them I had a damm gd day.

If I ever got married, I'd be tempted to just be me, dd, and parents, just need the man 1st!! xx