feeling very lonely!

smnb08

sorry if this is in the wrong place but thought it was worth a try.

i seperated from my partner in febuary after a 15 year relashionship.
wasnt this upset at the start as i thought we would work things out and we still saw each other nearly every day due to the children and still haveing to share a car.
It has now become obvious that hes never going to come back and i have realised i cant keep putting myself through the pain of seeing him everyday.
i havent seen or spoken to him since sunday and i feel so lonely.
ive tried looking for a chat site or something like that but there all about dateing or sex!!!
i just want someone to talk to sometimes. i have got a couple of friends but there busy most of the time with there own stuff.
has anyone got any ideas??
thanx

Tropez

Any local adult learning classes you can take? You can generally meet people there.

RedBern

Volunteer somewhere?

Miss_Orangey_Goodness

Hi OP, im sorry to hear this. Im in a similar situation - my OH of 11 years left in March. Its really tough.
First, I think you need to limit contact with him. Its been hard for you as you see him every day and there has been a glimmer of hope for you. You havent seen him since Sunday so the reality has hit you. Try organising set days for him to have the kids. My OH wanted to come round every night after work to see our son and I said no, he can see his son on the days he has him as I needed to have some head space.
Do you have any drinking/socialising friends? Do your family stay in touch? Does your OH have the children at his house so you can get out and about?
You say most chat sites are re dating - would you not consider this or just enter general banter with the opposite sex?

DUTR

Miss_Orangey_Goodness wrote: »

Hi OP, im sorry to hear this. Im in a similar situation - my OH of 11 years left in March. Its really tough.
First, I think you need to limit contact with him. Its been hard for you as you see him every day and there has been a glimmer of hope for you. You havent seen him since Sunday so the reality has hit you. Try organising set days for him to have the kids. My OH wanted to come round every night after work to see our son and I said no, he can see his son on the days he has him as I needed to have some head space.
Do you have any drinking/socialising friends? Do your family stay in touch? Does your OH have the children at his house so you can get out and about?
You say most chat sites are re dating - would you not consider this or just enter general banter with the opposite sex?

And blokes will be seeking that somewhere along the line, it maybe a topic difficult to avoid in the long run

smnb08

i should of explained myself better.
i work three nightshifts a week and 2 days so dont really want to commit to anything like an evening class also have to take the children to both sets of gradparents while i work the nights so dont really want to rely on anyone else for babysitting.
ex will be babysitting here twice a month as he is only able to have them overnight on the saturdays i work and to be honest thats as often as i think i can cope haveing him here.
dont have any drinking/socialising friends which is fine as i have been busy working and i always had my ex here so wasnt interested in going out anyway.

umdelicious

Know how you're feeling been through similar, but there are people out therejust a matter of time. I don't like the idea of dating sites, most men leave me cold, am fussy.

Was lonely for so long, but starting to find my feet, just a case of sorting out the wheat from the chaff. Will not have less rather be alone.

smnb08

Tried a chat room tonight lol.
i got offered money to pose topless.
i got asked what i was wearing by about 5 blokes
i even had one perv who was only interested in the age and sex of my children.
i am off the idea of chat rooms!

victory

Certainly picked the wrong chat room!!!:D

alyth

I split from my ex of 15 years 3 years ago, longer in fact now - I wil never ever get over it, my issue, i've tried everything but hasn't worked. However, what I do do is chat to guys, via plentyoffish - it's a bizarre site, I have a very strong profile that says that I want friends, nothing more, and I chat to a few very nice guys on it, and have done for the past three years. I've even been brave enough to meet perhaps 3 of them - weird, not for me, but I did it! Not everyone on these sites is looking for hot random sex, for sure I get my weird emails, but once you get chatting to some people, they turn out to be okay - generally! otherwise you just block the strange ones!]
I feel for you, but you have to put yourself out there - to meet people, whether in the real world or virtualy.

smnb08

Thank you i will try that one.
why dont you think you will ever get over it? is it coz you still love him?
i still love my ex very much even though i know i shouldnt..
The thing that hurts the most is looking back and realising he hasnt loved me for a long time.