Clearing debt with a toddler, no support and a house to keep on top of!

mmummy21

EDITED to give more info :-)

Bit of a long story. I live with my partner who has debts of his own and has not had his "lightbulb" moment yet. Despite my efforts he is unwilling to tackle our debts together and due to one relationship problem after another he would still like to keep our money seperate. I have been on maternity leave for a year now and return to work this week (well, I'm using holidays until the end of next month). My daughter is 10 months old. I have had little financial support from my OH while on maternity leave and have instead ran up debts which I had worked so hard to pay off before having my daughter! Now is the time to get them paid off once again.

I'm not being paid just now and can only really start on 15th October when I get my first wage (which will actually be higher than normal as I'm getting holidays at full-time rather than part-time rate) although I do get a week's wage on 15th September we have already practically emptied the joint account and OH has no money left over either so I will need this wage for bare essentials.

My partner is rubbish with money, worse than me and we are living way over our means! He doesn't get the concept of budgeting and quite often spends his whole monthly wage within a week of getting it. I then dip into my overdraft to bail him out or he borrows from family and friends, has to repay them from his next wage which then leaves him even more short the next month! Each month on payday I get him to transfer what should be enough to cover all our households bills, food etc. into a joint account but every single month we overspend, things bounce and I have to dip into my overdraft yet again to bail out the joint account as well! I can't take it anymore so I have taken my OH's joint account card off him and I will take sole responsibility for all bills, food and household expenses.

We have a joint account of which I will pay £350 into each month (my partner will pay in £800) which covers all household bills including insurances, food, baby expenses etc. As well as managing my own money and reducing my debts I will be trying to reduce the amount we spend from the household account - our household spending is the main problem! My salary after deductions each month will be £742 and I also recieve Child Benefit of £81 and Child Tax Credits of £41.

This diary is for me to keep me motivated and also for others to post tips and encouragement in to keep me going!

As well as paying debts off I have a few other things to consider -

- My daughters first birthday at the beginning of November
- Christmas (I will only buy the bare minimum - close family (Mum, Dad, brother, nephews) my daughter, my partner

My debts are -
- Owed to grandmother for my car £900 (I promised £100 per month but would like to pay more to clear once other debts excl overdraft are paid)
- Overdrawn main account £1000
- NEXT account £250
- New Look card £95
- Capital One Credit Card £70
- Argos Card £275

After my debts are cleared we really need -

- To start budgeting for Christmas and Birthdays
- To redecorate our bathroom and hallway
- Bedroom furniture
- A holiday!!!

Will continue soon!

mmummy21

I meant to say that my overdraft is only at £800 just now but my first pay won't be until 15th October (which will actually be a full-time wage and then on to part time from November) so I will need roughly £200 to get by between now and then! So I am really only starting to pay back debts from October.

Also forgot that I have a loan which I pay £70 monthly, no idea how long is left but at least a year!

So I have just had another thought. My daughter has almost outgrown her infant carseat and we need a new one. However she isn't big enough for one of the cheaper forward facing seats at only 7kg so it will have to be a combination seat so she can rear face for a bit longer. I have cut my Credit Card up so can't buy it on that. I looked at Argos but the one I want (Britax First Class Plus) is £30 more expensive than online shops!

The only choice I have is my overdraft for the carseat but that would mean extending it which I really don't want to do. Hmmm, need to think about this one!

Today's To Do list

Housework - dishes, hang up washing, put new wash on, wash nappies tonight, hoovering, bathroom scrub, put laundry away, clean stain off sofa
Other - take daughter out to park, submit online electricity and gas meter readings
Money saving - write a budget shopping list and order for delivery for next week

Off to get started!

mmummy21

Darn it

I was planning on a food shop this week. Checked online banking. £48.00 in the joint account. Two direct debits remaining for the month total £150.27. My own overdraft is £787.79. Next Thursday I will get paid £100. My monthly direct debits come to more than £119.07.

So, to make this work I will have to take OHs joint account card off him and come up with a shop to last until the end of the month for less than £47.73. I will then have to transfer £150.27 from my account to the joint account which will take me pretty much to my overdraft limit. From October I need to start reducing debts.

I need to plan the food shop now.

OH has no money and doesn't get paid until the end of the month.

Ahhh.

lindens

A suggestion for you - work out all the interest on the debts, only pay the minimum payment on the low ones and pay as much as you can off the high ones. The ones that I know that are extortionately high are Next, New look and argos.

What a shame your OH isnt on board - he doesnt sound very supportive TBH

lindens

mmummy21 wrote: »

Darn it


OH has no money and doesn't get paid until the end of the month.

Ahhh.

I hope you're not going to bail him out - two can play at that game

MummyEm

Hi just a couple of thoughts I had reading through.

Do you have any bits you could ebay / carboot / sell in local paper to give you a bit more for food for the month?

Also, does the website for the carseat take Paypal so you could pay from your b/a not CC?

Good luck x

mmummy21

Well, we have hundreds of food in the cupboards but it's all sorts of leftovers, stuff that we never use - tins, packets, frozen stuff that'd usually never get eaten. I don't mind eating the leftovers from our freezer and cupboard for another 3 weeks and OH will just have to miss out too! Although we really do need milk, cheese, bread etc. I think I will split it into 3 - so around £15 each shop and buy essentials to last a week. It's only my daughter (Macy) I'm worried about, we have enough formula milk to last but I like her to eat fresh fruit and veg everyday as well as decent meals. I'm sure I can be creative and come up with something though!!

No he isn't very supportive at all, we have had argument after argument about it but now isn't the time to leave - that's a whole other story!

I guess I could advertise my daughters baby walker which would give me probably a tenner towards food or something too. She has enough toys and clothes to last around 3months and hopefully will get more for her birthday from others!

With the carseat I've just realised it's only a month and a week until I get my real pay in October and she still has about an inch at the top of it so I think I can stretch it until then as long as she doesn't have a growth spurt. My Mum/Dad would buy it for me and let me pay them back in October if I was really desperate. The one I want is the Britax First Class Plus at about £100, there are cheaper ones online but I really really wanted a Britax as we use the car for long journeys across the dual carriageway etc. everyday and it would make me feel so much happier and safer if I could get the Britax!

I have had a really productive day and am so pleased. Both me and Macy are really poorly with a cold and throat infection but I have done everything on my list except the dishes and washing the nappies.

I also ordered a pack from o2 recycling today which should get me £5.03 for my broken digital camera and my old broken mobile phone. Pennies but it all adds up.

I registered for ChaCha UK and completed all the training.

AND I still had time to play with Macy, we've been practicing her walking holding onto just one hand, we've watched teletubbies and we've read some books. Now just wish Daddy would hurry up and get home so I can get the dishes done and tea on. Will get the nappies rinsed and washed tomorrow as I've been catching up on washing and have nowhere to dry them (hopefully it's sunny tomorrow!). Then I need to come up with more money ideas once Macy is in bed.

Will have to stop smoking unless I can somehow magic money for cigarettes out of thin air!

With the debts New Look, Capital One, Next and Argos are all about the same - I think the APR is horrific at about 34.9% or something, possibly Capital One the highest at 39.9%. My overdraft is £1 a day though so actually works out as the most expensive! Argos has less on it than I thought though!

Another summary to make it clearly to look at, I will update it with the exact amounts and interest rates once the little one is in bed!-

Debts October 2011 -
Overdraft 1000
New Look 95
Capital One 65.65
Next 250??
Car 900 (priority as owed to my Nana)
Argos 273
Loan £70 fixed repayment, unknown term!
(Total £2583.65 + loan)

Income October 2011
Salary 1125
Child Ben 81
Child Tax Creds 41
(Total 1247)

Outgoings October 2011

Joint A/C 450
Contact Lenses 9.98
Loan 69.07
Phone Bill 40
Car repayment to relative 100

That's the essentials but I also have Macy's birthday and the carseat to buy and the debt repayment. Since they are all roughly the same interest rate I was going to start with paying off the smallest ones first ..

Back later!

mmummy21

So having a think and looking at online banking and our budgeting. I'll explain how we do things first. Me and OH both get paid monthly. When I was working we both paid £500 each into the joint account on payday which covers rent, utilities, food, petrol etc. Once I started maternity leave we changed this to my OH paying £700 and I paying £300. Our main problem is that since having our daughter and with the cost of food, petrol etc. going up we are now spending more than is going in! Simply living beyond our means. OH is now paying £800 and from November I will pay £350 (slightly more in October which will stay in there. I know exactly where our problem is - TESCO. We spend far too much in there. Generally a shop of £120 every 10-14 days plus £20 once or twice a week and the odd £5.00 too. It all adds up to a ridiculous amount.

Summary of our Joint Account -

Rent 260 Monthly
Council Tax 76 Monthly (we overpaid earlier in the year, next year this figure will be closer to 100)
Gas 100-150 every 3rd month (recently switched to a cheaper fixed deal,
Elecs 100-150 every 3rd month
TV License 37.62 every 3rd month
Car Insurance 75.27 monthly (cheapest we could find, OH has 6points and I just passed in march, no NCD, will be reduced next march)
BT 35ish monthly
Home Insurance 10.52 monthly

That's it! We don't buy anything else, no Sky, no takeaways, no nights out. NOTHING. It all gets spend in blooming Tesco on rubbish! So my next task is to come up with a realistic shopping budget and meal plan!

mmummy21

Right today's To Do List -

Breakfast for me and Macy
Make the bed
Clean the kitchen and do the dishes (naughty me didn't do the dishes yesterday!)
Mop the kitchen and bathroom floor
Empty the tumble dryer and put all laundry away
Hang up the washing in the machine on the airer
Rinse and wash the nappies
Come up with a 7day meal plan and shopping list
Get lunch
Go and buy the shopping
Submit meter readings - MUST REMEMBER
Chase up which accounts I need to change my address with - MUST REMEMBER as all the statements etc. go to my old address and then I miss payments and get charged

Away to get started with breakfast :-)

tootoo

Hello, just scan reading as I have a toddler climbing on me! I can recommend the first class plus as thats the one we have.
I bought mine around a year ago and had her rear facing for a while. I bought mine from Mothercare as it was the cheapest place - I found a discount code on the forum on here. Maybe worth a look?

mmummy21

Yup, it's the First Class Plus that I want! I reckon it's an investment as it's birth to 4 years and Britax is a good make so it'll last!

Well, I might be skint but my house is immaculate - been very busy today. Tempted to buy a dishwasher on the Argos card, I figure it'll only take me 1 extra month to pay off but need to think about it first. It would make our life so much easier. Hmm will ponder.

My little one is ill and has come out in a group of spots though, think she has chickenpox but will know for sure tomorrow :-(

I made my meal plan to last until next Friday and a shopping list with a budget of £15. Sent OH with the list and he came back with everything and had only spent £12.21! He was very pleased with himself and I think he might be getting into this money saving. We have decided that we'll do every shop like this - I'll plan and write the list and he'll go get it. I'm a good budgeter/planner but I get muddled and flustered in Tesco whereas he is capable of sticking to the list. My meal plan involves using most of the freezer/cupboard contents though so goodness knows how we'll manage on £15 next week! Will just have to see what it brings.