Am I being unreasonable/sensitive about this (regarding learning to drive)

orange-sox

OH and I purchased a new(for us) car in January and decided we would keep our old one for me to learn in and keep for a few years while I'm at uni. I'm paying for the insurance for myself, just had the car MOT'd at a rather large cost and I feel like I should've never kept the car.

OH has been very reluctant to take me out driving (in a supermarket car park I might add... I in no way believe I should go on the road until I am competent), but has refused to allow me to take any lessons with a qualified instructor until I've got the basic controls under my belt claiming I will be "ripped off" and an instructor would drag out the basics over many lessons for no reason. It's now September, I have revised like mad for my theory test since I finished my full time job in June, and I feel more than ready to take it... yet OH is there again saying "You can't rush into these things, you should wait a few more weeks before you book a theory test". Realistically I needed to have passed my test before Jan '12 due to my uni course and the placements I will be on.

It's got to the point where I'm ready to book lessons behind his back and just get on with it. Am I being unreasonable here? I feel like OH feels a little threatened with the idea of me learning to drive. God I sound neurotic.

rodenal

OH needs a shake - It definately would help if you had a handle of the basic controls before starting lessons, but it isn't in any way shape or form a reason for putting them off. Why would any instructor want you to sit on a quiet road for 5 lessons instead of 2 - you'd soon get fed up doing the same thing when you felt like you had progressed and find somebody else.

Theory test can be taken whenever you like, though remember you only have 2 years (it used to be 2 anyway) from passing it to pass your full test, which might take longer than you anticipate

Strider590

orange-sox wrote: »

I feel like OH feels a little threatened with the idea of me learning to drive. God I sound neurotic.

That's more like the "gossip" explanation for what's occurring. I'm sure there are genuine reasons which you simply see as "excuses".
But I have to say there's no reason not to do the theory test ASAP, not unless your truly useless.

When you get into a car, nobody else is going to drive for you.
I once went out with an ex of mine when she was learning and it was the scariest thing ive ever done, a set of traffic lights changed to red and instead of stopping, she took her hands of the wheel and looked at me with those "omg help, I can't work the TV" eye's....... We ended up half way across a major junction with a stalled engine :eek:

anotherbaldrick

OH sounds a bit weird, try dinging him with the frying pan.

Alias_Omega

With Mrs AO, the theory test was booked at the closest date, which gave a time frame to revise.

Once you have the controls of the car (which Mrs AO practiced on private land :j) should take 10-12 lessons to pass your test. We booked the driving test for the instructor for 4 weeks ahead, so he had no chance to drag it out.


Just book the theory, then you know how long you have to revise. The local libary should have a up to date book you can get out free.

Once you have that under your belt, then find an instructor who your happy with.

Just avoid being stopped by the police without insurance, as an IN10 penalty will jack your insurance premiums before you start to pay them.

mikey72

I think he's got it backwards.

My daughter recently learnt to drive, I took her out in her car at midnight on her 17th birthday, he had her first lesson booked for 9.30am that morning.
The instructor taught her how to pass, I took her out every day to practice what she was being taught (not what I always thought what correct, but I'm30+ years out of date.)
She had her theory booked and passed before the instructor mentioned it.

irenee

Every learner should have basic lessons from a professional!

OHs are NOT the best to start off with - they can have developed many variations / minor infringments of the motoring rules in the time they have been driving since passing their test - no matter how adequate a driver they may be, they probably would not easily pass the test again - among other things the requirements and rules change - (Anyone here know about toucan crossings ??)

I passed my test in London first time at aged 43 - BUT it took my instructor many lessons to help me UNLEARN the faults I had picked up from my first husband's 'instructions' on how to drive and complete destruction of my confidence - sensibly my second husband refused to attempt to teach me to drive

You NEED proper instruction and guidance - if your OH feels threatened he could well (unintentionally or not) undermine your ability

fivetide

Just book yoursel f some lessons and be done with! If it goes ok then carry on.

If he's bothered about you not being in control, Arnold Clark will let you hire a dual control car too.

5t.

mikey72

fivetide wrote: »

Just book yoursel f some lessons and be done with! If it goes ok then carry on.

If he's bothered about you not being in control, Arnold Clark will let you hire a dual control car too.

5t.

Or he can just hang onto the door handle, grit his teeth, and watch the hedge and the ditch, wondering if his life is about to end.

For the first few times anyway.

bluenoseam

I'd also advise booking your own lessons, on turning 17 i went out with my big sister at the time and 10 years after that day i've never driven an inch further thanks to her screaming "you're going to tip the car" in my ear, i was going 15mph - the only way i was tipping that heap was if i rolled it onto a ramp Hollywood style! Learning with the family sounds like the perfect way to save money, but it almost earned me a long stretch for murder and i walked 2 miles home that day, very stupid of me given my Sister is arguably one of the least patient people i know and is probably one of the worst drivers i've seen in my time!

cajef

irenee wrote: »

(Anyone here know about toucan crossings ??)

Yes, they are exactly what they say Two Can Cross, pedestrians and cyclists, now how about a Pegasus crossing?:)