Esa and working partner?

bestpud

To be fair, you can't really take the moral high ground as you've been in your relationship for years and have made a calculated decision to stay living apart until your child related benefits stop.

Sometimes there is a very fine line between maximising benefits and fraudulently claiming them.

Mupette

It was only last year we decided we would marry,

A lot of private and personal things have gone on in our relationship and it's only the last year or so the we felt right about being a serious couple.

I'm not taking the moral highground, i know you so desperately want to band me as a benefits fiddler just like the OH's neighbour.

But speaking to benefits advisors about my situation after the last time you felt i was no better than a benefits cheat, i checked for myself.

I won't say what they thought about what you had said..

The relationship has not been a stable one, and it is only now that we are happy to take the next step.

It's taken me a long time to get over my last relationship, has left some deep nasty scars, even i didn't want to marry and settle down with the first bloke i see.

Just for the record, child related benefits will be stopping next year too, DS will be in 6th form for the next 2 years.... so no i'm not staying single until DS leaves school.

bestpud

Mupette wrote: »

It was only last year we decided we would marry,

A lot of private and personal things have gone on in our relationship and it's only the last year or so the we felt right about being a serious couple.

I'm not taking the moral highground, i know you so desperately want to band me as a benefits fiddler just like the OH's neighbour.

But speaking to benefits advisors about my situation after the last time you felt i was no better than a benefits cheat, i checked for myself.

I won't say what they thought about what you had said..

The relationship has not been a stable one, and it is only now that we are happy to take the next step.

It's taken me a long time to get over my last relationship, has left some deep nasty scars, even i didn't want to marry and settle down with the first bloke i see.

Just for the record, child related benefits will be stopping next year too, DS will be in 6th form for the next 2 years.... so no i'm not staying single until DS leaves school.

You openly admitted you were waiting until the child related benefits had stopped. There was no guess work on my part - it is what you said.

Fact is, most people who 'maximise' benefits will have reasons for doing so.

People in glass houses....

Mupette

bestpud wrote: »

You openly admitted you were waiting until the child related benefits had stopped. There was no guess work on my part - it is what you said.

Fact is, most people who 'maximise' benefits will have reasons for doing so.

People in glass houses....

You do this everytime, i was wondering when you would pop in and throw that in again!!

if i was 'maximising' benefits don't you think i would wait for those few extra years to get married...until lets say DS is 19/20, next you'll be saying i am forcing DS to stay in full time education just so i can squander his money.

OH and i dont live together, we are not in each other's pockets.. he has his own home and bills and i have mine. (i seem to recall i have told you that before as well)

This next bit you will love i am sure of it, are throw it at me some point in the future...

Obviously if i am fortunate to get a job before i marry, i might be entiteled to wtc... should i tell them no thanks bestpud thinks its morally wrong to do so..


your the expert. (aparently)

merlin68

Why would he be claiming at a different address, there married, it would have to be a joint claim.
You can work and claim ESA you know. As long as you declare the income.
What's happening to your oh's house when you both move into your council house.
If they find out you grassed them up, I wouldn't want to be in your shoes.

Mupette

he will be renting it out, as it is unsuitable for my needs to move to, we did think of of me moving in as it is my childhood home (parents sold it to him all legal and above board)

But i just can't manage the stairs there..

and ofcourse it will be declared.

bestpud

Mupette wrote: »

You do this everytime, i was wondering when you would pop in and throw that in again!!

if i was 'maximising' benefits don't you think i would wait for those few extra years to get married...until lets say DS is 19/20, next you'll be saying i am forcing DS to stay in full time education just so i can squander his money.

OH and i dont live together, we are not in each other's pockets.. he has his own home and bills and i have mine. (i seem to recall i have told you that before as well)

This next bit you will love i am sure of it, are throw it at me some point in the future...

Obviously if i am fortunate to get a job before i marry, i might be entiteled to wtc... should i tell them no thanks bestpud thinks its morally wrong to do so..


your the expert. (aparently)

Well, I guess you've been together a long time and it would be better to make the move a bit before you actually lose the benefits.

You said it so I'm not sure why you feel I am wrong to point out the hypocrisy in your posts.

It could be asked why work is becoming an option now you are about to start struggling financially.

Best of luck to you though - you clearly have it all nicely tied up. :beer:

Mupette

merlin68 wrote: »

Why would he be claiming at a different address, there married, it would have to be a joint claim.
You can work and claim ESA you know. As long as you declare the income.
What's happening to your oh's house when you both move into your council house.
If they find out you grassed them up, I wouldn't want to be in your shoes.

I see where your comming from but.. it just doesn't add up, things that are going on next door,

Brand new stuff, ok this could all be on brighthouse or never never, french windows put in on a council property.. i can't see the council doing that...

of course it could all be knock off stuff.... even worse.

What i am saying is the amount of money being spent, is no way covered by esa and say cleaning job in the evening.

They keep buying dogs, as pupies (few hundered at a time £)
once dog goes past the cute puppy stage they get rid at a loss, and go buy another...

Garden he has done (the one with the bad back) not a scratch on Groundforce but lifting 6ft panels into place etc.. bags of gravel, he decorated the house once this year, she didn't like it and so he has had to do it all over again top to bottom.

He's not even attempting to fake the bad back when out and about. Lifting up the kids and swinging them around, Moving stuff into the house, (always in the evening)

I know bad backs can be nasty things, had a spot of bother with mine when diagnosed with fibro.. no way could i do a thing, couldnt even stand up straight. (and mine was nothing compared to what can happen with a back).

They may not be doing anything wrong as you say Merlin68, but the french windows on a council rented property?

Mupette

bestpud wrote: »

Well, I guess you've been together a long time and it would be better to make the move a bit before you actually lose the benefits.

You said it so I'm not sure why you feel I am wrong to point out the hypocrisy in your posts.

It could be asked why work is becoming an option now you are about to start struggling financially.

Best of luck to you though - you clearly have it all nicely tied up. :beer:

lets not skip around the bush here, say what you really mean.

I've not always been on benefits, only since 2008 (i think- mind you i am sure your already skipping to old posts of mine to see if i will trip up, no not the case MS screws your memory.) when i was unfortunate to become to ill to work, We were not living together then, not even a serious couple then either, alhough the illness has knocked our heads together.

Why work now... try being stuck at home, for these past few years, brain turning to sludge, (when your digging around the old posts i expect you will find one that says that i wanted to take a few years out to manage this illness and learn to cope with it). And now i don't want to be stuck at home anymore, i want to do something.. just to get out of the house, earning money is also good,

But my illness came first unless you have been there and had to cope with it, i am not sure you really would understand. MS/ME/Fibro and many others, not visable but can destroy any sense of self worth, respect... i'm just wanting to claim my life back, some dignity.

If by your assumptions that i am in this just to get all i can from the benefits, then why am i getting married next year, and not when DS has finished full time education, isn't that going against 'maximising' the benefits system.

I ask on here what i should and shouldn't do, you bring in 'your' morals. Try and twist it, but at the end of the day it is your morals, I see nothing illegal has been done, again you would state 'morally it is wrong' we will agree to disagree, i am not taking a penny more than what the state feel i should receive, even dla asked did i want my care needs upped for night time, would of meant more money, i declined, as i didn't need or want it. doesn't sound right coming from someone you think is 'maximising' do you.

merlin68

Don't forget they will be getting child tax credit and child benefit as well. My hubby put a back door in our council property, but all the stuff came from freecycle, as did all the internal doors ,we have done. I also had a social fund loan to replace the wetroom as council wouldn't do it and it was mouldy. My suite, brand new is on tick.
It looks like we have loads of new stuff, but it was either very cheap of ebay or freecycled.
You need to get out more.