How do you know when it's time to let go?

the_devil_made_me_do_it

My cat is really ill & dosen't seem to be getting better. At the moment I'm living from day to day with her. The vet seems to think she either has pancreatitis or possible liver tumours.

She hasn't eaten properly for a few days, although she is still attempting to drink & is using the litter tray. However, she just isn't the same cat she used to be.

Also, she has started going under the bushes at the back of the garden & I'm having to grab her to get her to come in. Could she be going there to die?

My head is all over the place at the moment & just need some advice.

jess1974

I'm sorry no useful advice to give, just could'nt read and not reply xx

horsechestnut

I went through a similar thing with my cat 13 years ago. She kept finding a corner of a room which she didn't usually frequent and died later that morning in the spot that she had chosen for herself. I had finally made the very difficult decision to take her to the vet for the last time and she died whilst I was getting dressed.
I don't know if that helps, but I know what you are going through.

*onlyme*

I went through the same dilema last week... and we decided we owe it to him to do what is the kindest for him and not let him suffer and we have always said with all our animals, if their quality of life deteriorates (once nothing more can be done), then we will send them on their way to the rainbow bridge. Not easy and you think one more day and are in 2 minds as you have feelings of guilt. I was kinda hoping Kieran would peacefully die in his sleep but that was me being selfish in a way as I felt so sick making that trip to the vet with him.

You will know when the time is right... thinking of you

the_devil_made_me_do_it

Many thanks for the kind words.

She is still under the bushes & since it is relatively dry, I am going to leave her there for the time being. If it comes to taking her to the vets, I want her to feel the fresh air on her face for one last time.

It's so difficult to know what to do, & I guess I am hanging on hoping she takes a turn for the better. It was only early on this year that I lost my 4 gerbils. They died one by one within weeks of each other. I can't bear to lose my kitty. She has been with me through thick and thin for approx 19 years. I feel sick to my stomach every time the thought comes into my mind to take her to the vets & have her put to sleep.

I tried Royal Canin Recovery food yesterday & she did eat a small portion, but when I checked the Royal Canin website, the recovery food isn't suitable for pancreatits. However, they do a Convalesence food, so I am going to try that & see.

Also sending loving thoughts to others who have been or are in this position with their pets.

rising_from_the_ashes

So sorry to hear your kitty's not well, Devil.

At 19 she will have inevitably aged and slowed down but should still be enjoying life. You will know when that's not the case anymore and that's when the time's right.

My old cat had kidney disease and put up a brave battle for 8 years but I could just tell one week that he wasn't himself and wasn't enjoying life as much. I thought about it for a week or so (he wasn't in pain etc) and came to the conclusion that another round of invasive treatment wasn't in his best interest so had to let him go (it broke my heart and still miss him load and loads).

I felt guilty for a long time as I'm sure he could've gone on for a few more weeks but gradually came to accept that it was best for him to go before he really started to suffer and that now helps. "A day too soon rather than a day too late" is one of the truest things I've ever been told.

(((hugs)))

TallGirl

I feel your pain I had to make that decision with my cat Eric last January he was 14. He had kidney failure and although we had a scan we did not want the vet to open him up. He got thinnner and thinner and in the end I said to my DH it was time to book him in to the vet. This was a Monday and they said come today at 5pm which I couldn't (work away and had to travel) and DH refused to do it on this own. We agreed to take the Wednes 4pm appointment. Wednesday 11am he wanted to go out he could barely hold his head when he drank out of a flower pot and I took him inside. About 30 min later I found him in a corner I don't usually see him in and he was fitting. I rang the vet they said bring him in. DH raced home and we took off. Got to the vet and they took him away and put him down.

Not the way I wanted it to end I would ideally have had him die in the sleep or second best been holding him as he died by injection.

My DH feels it was the best thing as Eric kind of told us when it was time to go.

I hope you make the right decision for you and the cat.

PS 3 weeks later we picked up 2 Maine Coon Kittens and they are a total delight they wont replace Eric but the house feels right again.

There_Goes_Trouble

You have to look at the alternatives.

When I had to make the decision with my dog she had stopped eating completely and wouldn't swallow even if I put tablets down her throat. They just sat there in her throat. So for me, I had the choice to either PTS, or watch my dog starve to death in great pain with no painkillers. It was a no brainer. She probably could have gone on for another day or so, but since I had no way of knowing exactly how bad the pain was, I decided to make the decision sooner rather than later. I have never regretted it or felt any guilt.

By the way pancreatitis benefits from a very low fat diet, although I'm not sure about the implications of that if it's a liver tumour.

the_devil_made_me_do_it

I think she has had pancreatits attacks in the past & she is a diabetic in remission. From researching on net & in books I have, if it is pancreatits, then it may have been caused by the antibiotics & steriod injection she had a few weeks ago.

In a few months she has had 3 courses of antibiotics ( 1 lot for urine infection, another lot for gingivitis & the 3rd lot for suspected urine infection).

The vet did say her urine didn't show anything sinister, so he suspected that her kidneys were working fine for her age. She also dosen't appear to have gingivitis anymore, ears & eyes clear. The problem seems to be tenderness close to were the liver/pacncreas are situated. There is nothing that can be done for either problems & I don't want to put her through exploratory tests if she can't be helped. Just got to keep hoping.

User_Bob

Its a bit difficult to explain, but they sort of tell you and you sort of know. They just look at you in a different way and you know they have had enough of this current life and when you go to the vets, you absolutely know its the right thing to do.

If you have a bond with your pet, (as you clearly do), and they trust you, (which they clearly do) and you both love each other, (which you clearly do) then something very special occurs and you both know when its time for that last goodbye.

This has happened with all three of my much loved past cats, and I hope and expect it will happen with my current two.

Take care, make the most of the time left and know that you are doing the right thing.

xx

meritaten

I dont have any advice for you - its your pet its your decision!
all I can say is that twice I feel I held on too long to my much loved pet.
the first time was my dog Megan - I was told her kidneys and other organs were failing but it was only when she became incontinent and there was more blood than wee - did I do the kind thing and take her to be PTS.
The second was my cat Nicki - who had Feline Aids - I KNOW that I kept him too long - I just couldnt bear to let him go - I loved him too much! and bless him he was so uncomplaining.....but looking back, he knew it was his time, and I am really sorry I put him through weeks when he didnt really have any quality of life. I know he has forgiven me for that - I just cant forgive myself! I knew that with the Aids I wouldnt have him long - and I was selfish and refused to see that HE was suffering. It took a straight talking vet to make me see I was prolonging his life for selfish reasons - and I thank him for it. What I am trying to say is that the last few weeks I KNEW nicki should be PTS - but wouldnt do it because of MY feelings of grief and loss. I wasnt thinking what would be best for Nicki!