How much per month to help daughter?

Bennifred

I think he needs to budget better than he is currently doing if £250 per month isn't lasting him! Logically, maybe £120 of that will be going on food. What's he doing with the rest? I would definitely be asking for details - it's your hard-earned cash he's asking for! Sometimes the obvious needs pointing out (it is not necessary to go drinking every night, etc)

anon_ymous

devildog wrote: »

I guess if you can afford it and it includes food then it sounds ok. You haven't mentioned what 'free' money she will have left over from maintenance loans(grants/bursary if any)after she has paid for accomodation. If it works out that she has around £50 pw 'spare' and you then top up with another £50pw I honestly think that will be too much.
TBH I started at £200 pm for my eldest and after two months they turned around to me and said I think you are giving me too much, I don't need it all lol(how proud was I that they were honest enough to say that)
Had to laugh at them though and said you do realise what this means...... and money was cut. It seems like a punishment for them being honest but they know full well that if things get tight we will step in, but believe me they haven't gone without in the slightest(they even managed an overseas holiday) which is more than we had!!!

Without wanting to sound arrogant or cocky, I keep telling my Mum not to send me any money but she sends £100/week!; meaning that I haven't even tapped in to my loan money. Im getting way too much from my parents, and again without wanting to sound arrogant, I get £144/week to live off after rent has been taken (Gave money in advance to get a 5% discount)

I've agreed with my Mum however that what I don't spend, Ill give to my sister. Currently, I get the money in via a standing order

BTW, Im studying in the midlands. It's not as cheap as my home town but it is still relatively cheap

anon_ymous

Bennifred wrote: »

I think he needs to budget better than he is currently doing if £250 per month isn't lasting him! Logically, maybe £120 of that will be going on food. What's he doing with the rest? I would definitely be asking for details - it's your hard-earned cash he's asking for! Sometimes the obvious needs pointing out (it is not necessary to go drinking every night, etc)

£120 on food/month is pretty much exactly what I spend (getting the healthy-ish stuff over the absolute cheapest stuff) and say about £30 for a society; then rent is £74/week or £70.30 in my case(Utilities inclusive). The rent is the most expensive thing and Im normally spending £400/month in total because of that BUT my finance covers that (even though I havent tapped in to it yet)

Saying that, I tend not to spend on what I do not need

MILLYMOLLY

I'm reading this thread with interest as my youngest is talking of going to uni, only in yr 11 at the moment.

A friend said 'oh that's going to cost you a fortune' my reply was 'Why, i'm not going he is' (I was joking). However I don't intend to let him know in advance that I will help I want to see how he copes first.
Is this really harsh.

Bennifred

MILLYMOLLY wrote: »

I'm reading this thread with interest as my youngest is talking of going to uni, only in yr 11 at the moment.

A friend said 'oh that's going to cost you a fortune' my reply was 'Why, i'm not going he is' (I was joking). However I don't intend to let him know in advance that I will help I want to see how he copes first.
Is this really harsh.

Not harsh at all - sensible, I'd say! :beer:

kayr_2

However I don't intend to let him know in advance that I will help I want to see how he copes first.
Is this really harsh.

I did this (i.e. didn't divulge our financial intentions) but it backfired a bit as my son became extremely worried about money and declared he wasn't going to university because he had worked out he wouldn't get a grant and couldn't see how he would manage! It depends on the personality of your child really - a lot of teenagers aren't worried by money as they don't think ahead too much; others do. My son is now in his first term and is genuinely grateful for our help - he sees his friends struggling; not those from poor backgrounds who get grant plus bursaries but the "squeezed middle" where household income is just above the threshold. He isn't spending a lot and has even suggested us giving him less which is a brilliant idea!

Brightness

My son is in 2nd yr of his degree & has a part time job. He earns about £200 a month max and even manages to run a car on that. We don't give him cash - can't afford to as I can't work and hubs has just been made redundant. I do give him stuff to take back with him and he's home for a few days and so has brought about 15 loads of washing with him. He manages perfectly well and has a social life too. If they shop with a friend or whatever and go somewhere like Morrisons or Tesco they can get packs of meat 3 for a tenner of whatever and multipacks of beans, tomatoes etc then split the food and cost between them. Son has been doing this with his housemate since he started last year. They were in halls together and now houseshare together. She came to stay with us and met her boyfriend whilst here - she's now trying to find him a girlfriend LOL. It's amazing that if they don't have the money, how well they cope, especially if like my son they find someone to share stuff with. This pair even share cooking and last year they did their washing together too to save money

Lucy-Lew

My brother has just started university, as the youngest child he has had it a little easier than the rest of us and expects a lot from our parents. I've worked part time or full time since I was 16, during term time and holidays respectively (not because I had to as such, I just liked the independence of a bit of extra spending money) and I feel this has done me the absolute world of good. Meeting all different sorts of people, learning the value of hard work and the feeling that I earnt my pay, all whilst balancing and prioritising studying work-loads has been such a valuable experience.
Sadly little brother seems to have no intention still of finding part time work, and I feel this lack of interaction with the "real-world" could be detrimental in the long term.
No matter what your financial situation looks like when your son/daughter decides to go to university, I would strongly advise encouraging them to work saturdays or part time. Only then can they get a real sense of the value of money and will think twice before calling for bail-outs!