Christening/ baptism should I or shouldn't i?

LilacPixie

It late and i'm tired but i need to try get something written down, feel free to add comments or advice if you want but don't feel obliged to say something beccause i suspect there is no right or wrong answer. ok that sounds cryptic.

long story short is I am Catholic, hubby isn't. We married in a civil ceremony.

OH parents are made up of his mum catholic and his dad not, they opted to let their kids decide what religion to follow and subsequently BIL has been baptised and i was his sponsor, my husband never has but does attend church if not working. .My parents are both RC and I was baptised at under 3 weeks old, siblings the same

I usually go on a saturday evening with our kids.

When i was pregnant with baby number 1 we decided that we would let them choose there own religion when they felt the time was right.. now I am having second thoughts. I take the kids to church with me after all so its hardly me being an impartial parent and letting them choose is it.

There is also the added thing that dd1 is almost 5, she has friends she knows from church and in a few short years they will al be preparing for their first communion and DD1 won't be.

I am confused TBH Not sure how much of my thoughts are not wanting DD1 to feel excluded and how much is a genuine belief than we need to look at out decision again because what we said and what we are doing appear different

Person_one

You can get baptised at any age, don't do it when they're too young to understand or agree, wait until they're old enough to make an informed decision, let them know that's why.

Unless of course you believe that an unbaptised child's soul is in danger of hell or limbo, in which case I;d question why you bother worshipping such a vindictive god.

Nicki

Being baptized as a child does not preclude the child making their own decisions when an adult. Lots of children are baptized in various faiths, yet there are far fewer adults practising those faiths later in life! Equally, adults can and do covert to religion or within types of religion whether or not they have been baptized.

If you are a practising Catholic, and you take your child to mass regularly, then I would allow them to take first communion with their peers and be baptized first. And that is speaking as a non Catholic! Your child is already being brought up in a religious household however and all that will be gained by not doing so is to isolate them from their peers and call into question what you are currently teaching. I think 5 is too young to send that kind of mixed message. Tbh it will probably have very little impact on what if anything they go on to believe as adults, as most adults I know whether religious or not have made their own decisions independent of their parents.

mandi

Pixie Hi

Life is too short to worry about religion and what people think of you .

Your children are young and care free ... Isn't it amazing

CH27

Children also need to be baptised if you want them to attend a Church school.

Luciferswench

Its your religion you actively encourage your children to attend so why not allow them to take part fully after all they can change their minds when they are older. A Baptism is yours and the godparents promises to ensure the child attends church and brought up in the faith not the childs promise Its more harmful for the child to be excluded from certain activities within the church than to include them really, let them join in like their friends.

Teenie_D

CH27 wrote: »

Children also need to be baptised if you want them to attend a Church school.

Not up here they don't.

flutterby_lil

I am catholic and have had my son baptised, partly as I want him to go to a good school but partly as it was expected by my grandma and grandad who go to church every day. I hope this faith is listened to by god tomorrow as my grandad has just found out he has cancer on friday and is having an operation tomorrow. Good luck grandad.

I take my son to church one sunday in 4 - heis about to start school next september so feel i have to do this to get him into the one i want. I am not particularly religious but feel i need to go .

CH27

Teenie_D wrote: »

Not up here they don't.

I would have expected the Catholic Church to have the same rules UK wide:huh:

Teenie_D

I was raised a catholic and I know my Mum would really like my 2 to get baptised (there's no pressure but she has mentioned it). Part of me would like them to get baptised but then I don't attend church and doubt I ever will again so I think it would be a bit hypocritical. If they decide when they are older that they want to get baptised then I will fully support it though.

January20

LilacPixie, I am from a RC family - but non believers really. My parents don't go to church and I went to Sunday School (or rather French equivalent until I was 11). I think it was more tradition that belief that made my parents get us all christened. We didn't do our communion either. I did feel a little left out of it at the time as all my other friends were doing theirs but it didn't scar me for life.

I now wish my parents hadn't got me christened because as an adult I consider myself an atheist but there is nothing I can do to revoke my christening. The church won't allow it. I will forever be part of the RC church and it bugs me no end as I had no choice in the matter, and my anti-religion beliefs now are very strong.

If you get your children christened you remove any choice from them.

ETA: Hopefully, your dd will make friends with all kind of children from all kind of religious and cultural backgrounds, so feeling excluded shouldn't be a problem unless you raise her solely in a RC environment.