In my mobility scooter yesterday

victory

Thanks jessie it is very kind of you to take the time to post and thank you for those lovely reassuring words, it is touching to know that not everyone out there is as horrible as the other day in the queue:D

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

I am shocked at that.

Last month, I went to a Blockheads concert and whilst waiting in the bar, I had the joys of people smiling and stepping over me, rather than expecting me to get up because my leg was blocking the way (could have had some rather nice looking chaps in my lap at a moment's notice ).

When actually inside, someone went and pinched a seat from the bar area for me and placed it right at the front, so I could sit down when I wanted to, then halfway through, someone mentioned that they had a friend who was disabled at the back - I asked 3 blokes to go and help him and they came back with his friend and a seat for him, too. Was like the parting of the Red Sea

Spent most of the time dancing very badly (well leaning on my crutch and jigging around) and singing even worse and even louder! People were absolutely fine - no pushing, no shoving, no nasty comments about how we were at the front or how I was managing to dance - not a single problem (not even a mention of how much beer I could put away :whistle:)

And I got given the set list by the vocalist at the end.


It may be that - well, actually, I'm pretty certain it is - I don't get so much grief because I am a fairly lairy person when I have to be, and my body language gives this impression. Well, along with the mega muscles in my arms It's not your fault at all, perhaps they saw you as vulnerable because you are so much shorter when on a scooter and nowhere near as stroppy an old moo as I am?

Rest assured, had I been there with you, I would have been scattering sarky gitbags like skittles in my wake 'SCUSE ME! PARDON ME! COMING THROUGH! LADY NEEDS ASSISTANCE OVER THERE' Treading on toes with my DMs, accidentally walloping shins with the crutch and telling people to 'go away' :cool: if they said a single unpleasant word to me.


Let's see if MSE will let me say this;

'B0LL0CKS to the lot of you! I'm here and I'm not ashamed - if you don't like it, well !!!! OFF!!!!!!!!'


OK, not all of that got through

easy

JoJo, I agree with you.

Victory, I sympathise with you about yesterday, but in my experience, it is far better if you can be more assertive - without being rude of course.

Yes you are disabled, and you have EVERY right to be wherever you were, just as much right as those folk who were stood up queuing.

I'm afraid I do tend to speak up, quite loudly, if I get stuck in that situation on my scooter. "EXCUSE ME, I'm SOOOOO sorry, could I get thru ?" I also find it helps to tell people where I'm trying to get to "Sorry, I'm just trying to get to ..... so that I'll be out of your way, could I just get past ??" I say the word 'sorry' , but keep my head up, look 'em in the eye and try to sound like it's not MY problem, it's theirs for being in the way.

It does help if you can take control of the situation, rather than let the situation control you. You can't HELP being on a scooter, it's a fact, so let's just get on with it. Tell whoever is in your way where you are trying to get to, 8 times out of ten they'll actually start to shift folk for you.

And please don't tell your child not to ask folk to move. He's doing what he can to help you, and nothing wrong with that, my son does it too, and I'm proud of him for it, as you should be !!

Yesterday was a bad day, I know. But you need to shake it off, but use the experience to manage it better next time

Oh and do try NOT to cry if you can - it just re-inforces folk's attitude that if your legs don't work, your brain doesn't either.

happy_lass

you should of just done a 'madge' from the tv series 'benidorm' and barged em all out of the way and told em all to f**k off......lol

Molly41

Jojo_the_Tightfisted wrote: »

Rest assured, had I been there with you, I would have been scattering sarky gitbags like skittles in my wake 'SCUSE ME! PARDON ME! COMING THROUGH! LADY NEEDS ASSISTANCE OVER THERE' Treading on toes with my DMs, accidentally walloping shins with the crutch and telling people to 'go away' :cool: if they said a single unpleasant word to me.


Let's see if MSE will let me say this;

'B0LL0CKS to the lot of you! I'm here and I'm not ashamed - if you don't like it, well !!!! OFF!!!!!!!!'


OK, not all of that got through

Oh Jo Jo send me an ounce of your attitude. Im such a mouse - I end up repeatedly saying sorry, sorry, sorry.........as I weave my way around obstacles (aka other people). I apologise profusely after taking half the shop out because there is no space. Actually I just want to shout MOVE OUT OF MY (bleep bleep) way!

Molly41

Another pet hate is when you get hemmed in by other shoppers. A fat smelly man thinks its fine to push himself right into the space i need to back up as there is another woman invading my personal scooter space in front of me. :mad:

Sorry Victory I just got confused and thought I had read the thread but realised it was another one. I would have been just the same but do have a very assertive Kids Dad who has no compunction in saying what is what. I hope you are feeling much brighter now x

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

Molly41 wrote: »

Oh Jo Jo send me an ounce of your attitude. Im such a mouse - I end up repeatedly saying sorry, sorry, sorry.........as I weave my way around obstacles (aka other people). I apologise profusely after taking half the shop out because there is no space. Actually I just want to shout MOVE OUT OF MY (bleep bleep) way!

[gets shovel from shed to heap large quantities of attitude into a box for Molly and anyone else who wants some]

Anyone got a bigger box?

victory

Thanks I am not a mouse but not loud either, I try to 'blend in' not upset anyone because it takes a millisecond for them to turn from smily pleasant happy people to anti scooter rage aggresive yobs:D

I am proud of my son, very proud, he helps me enormously for someone so young he is very good with me and my need and very in tune it is just that I hate the way people look at him when he politely asks, if they have to look at someone like that look at me that way and leave him out of it, he deserves better.

I cried and lost control because I felt overwhelmed, mobbed, invisible and 'picked on' for something I just can't help.

I felt alone, like I was the only person on the planet that was disabled in a very long hot windy queue waiting for her tickets, it was hell.

Savvy_Sue

It's the age old apology thing, isn't it? "I'm so sorry you're upset by by what I said" rather than "I'm so sorry I upset you by what I said" ...

So I like easy's advice!

Solstice_Twilight

Big hugs! I must admit I tend to avoid taking my scooter anywhere now and rely on my burly OH and my wheelchair if I want to go out! When I worked close to home, I used to scooter to work on the theory that then I was able to independently go out at lunch time. I went into town twice. The first time, I got a lot of grief for taking my scooter into the post office. If the queue hadn't been so long, I would have parked it outside and gone in with walking sticks, but there was no way I could stand for that long. The second time I had a panic attack after being hemmed in and verbally abused in the supermarket. I hated that a tool that was supposed to enable my independence was actually causing such vitriol that I'm frightened to go out alone.