Mis-sold Ryanair? trip from hell !!!!

Bob_the_Saver

Hobsons_Choice wrote: »

Fiona says she thinks you're NOT Robert Peston! I was corresponding with you in good faith and thought I recognised the turn of phrase and the strangled vowels of Robert Peston. I was smiling at my cleverness (Bob The Saver = Robert Peston). Now I feel a complete fool, and rather hurt if you want to know the truth. Jeremy and I have booked The Marbella Club and fly out on Thursday via British Airways. No...I'm NOT going to apologise, I've been completely duped by you Bob (or whatever your real name is). You really ARE a sink estate oink aren't you and I expect you've never even been on a day trip to Oxford or Cambridge. I should have known, I s'pose...Mr O'Leary once warned me (we met at the Guinness party) that there are the lower orders out there that like nothing better than pulling apart Ryanair, in fact I believe he's thinking of increasing his flight charges by 12% just to discourage people like you.
The Marbella Club will be near enough to connect with the common people, but far enough away so that we don't have to actually mix or eat with them (shudder).
Anyway, Jeremy says the Puento Romano is full of snobs!
Postscript: Rowena is NOT surprised at the sniping about her name, she's lived with it for most of her life.
She changed her name from Russell Hobbs in the 70s....but that's another story.

If your mate O'Leary put prices up 12% that'll add nearly a quid to most of my flights, B******! I'll nick the inflight mag to make up for it, and
wrap a load of bog roll around my legs when I go for a slash,
i'll get the money back somehow, hows that for moneysaving?
Anyhows I've just looked at the forecast for where yous going,
I hope you like it really HOT 40c today, don't forget to drink lots of fluids :beer:

Hobsons_Choice

Hmmm..maybe you ARE Robert Peston after all?
I always drink plenty of fluids, Jeremy is in the Sunday Times Wine Club, and stop pretending you can read! In flight magazine will soon be subject to a 20p charge and lavatory paper doesn't grow on trees you know!!

Bob_the_Saver

lavatory paper doesn't grow on trees you know!!

I bet they use the recycled stuff, often wondered how they get it clean!!!!!!

igaveupnowimback

This thread is hilarious! Great double act, love it

Hobsons_Choice

Oh Bobbie dearest, the thought of recycled toilet paper makes me want to retch. Thank goodness I always use my Tena Ladies whenever I fly. Jeremy has his Pampers, of course.
Mr. O'Leary isn't really a mate you know (I don't think he has many friends, poor chap), we only met a couple of times at functions. One was at the Irish Embassy, you should see the amount of Jamesons that fellow can get through. The other was a Guinness Party, (the family, not that awful black stouty stuff) and the canapes were soggy. Mr O'Leary put most of them in his handbag (I don't think I'm giving away any secrets here) to dry out and present them on the Dublin-Glasgow flight. I doubt anyone noticed.
Fiona is telling me she likes a bit of uneducated "rough" and could you forward your mobile telephone number please. She's so headstrong! Rowena gives her an allowance in addition to Jeremy's, but she seems to spend it all in one night at Bouji's. Is it possible we could claim additional monies, as you seem to?

Bob_the_Saver

Hobsons_Choice wrote: »

Oh Bobbie dearest, the thought of recycled toilet paper makes me want to retch. Thank goodness I always use my Tena Ladies whenever I fly. Jeremy has his Pampers, of course.
Mr. O'Leary isn't really a mate you know (I don't think he has many friends, poor chap), we only met a couple of times at functions. One was at the Irish Embassy, you should see the amount of Jamesons that fellow can get through. The other was a Guinness Party, (the family, not that awful black stouty stuff) and the canapes were soggy. Mr O'Leary put most of them in his handbag (I don't think I'm giving away any secrets here) to dry out and present them on the Dublin-Glasgow flight. I doubt anyone noticed.
Fiona is telling me she likes a bit of uneducated "rough" and could you forward your mobile telephone number please. She's so headstrong! Rowena gives her an allowance in addition to Jeremy's, but she seems to spend it all in one night at Bouji's. Is it possible we could claim additional monies, as you seem to?

I was just sayin to her the other day there's nought worse than a soggy canopy. I'll PM you with me Ifone number I don't want to pubicise it too
much as I might not be able to handle all the others as well :kisses:
As for more dosh you can claim for ANYTHING I've put a link below
to the claimants bible, just read this and see what scams were all up to
https://www.dailymail.co.uk not only is it full of information but makes an
ideal alternative if you can't nick O'leary's bog rolls.
I've got to do sum real moneysaving this afternoon and find a cheap
flight for eldest, he's banned from your mate's airplanes after the last 'incident'.
The Thunderbirds caught im joining the mile high club in the rear bogs with some
tart from Essex. i don't think they minded im sh*gg*ng her onboard it was
when the silly cow light a fag afterwards they got stroppy.
Maybe there's a cheap flight with Sqeezyjet.

Bob_the_Saver

I've just herd from Bob the Saver, seems he's back tomorrow so my housesitting stint is over. I'm sure it suited him and obviously cash in hand suited me maybe he'll learn to choose a better password for his computer now, gordonwasaw**ker was so easy to guess.
Her is in twoloos so will be back soon if she can get a lift. Thanks for all your help, advice and most of the comments especially 'Hobsons Choice' (sounds a stuck up *** if you ask me) but she were mostly polite - more that can be said for someone who PM'd me, I might be a cretin but at least i know it's not spelt with a K!

Just goes to show ow many people'll read a thread if you put Ryanair in the title.

hAve a good summer holiday and if you're bookin a flight with Michael and the Thunderburds don't forget to pay with a pre-paid masterbcard.


Yours Darren

Hobsons_Choice

You mean I was corresponding with Darren and not Robert? Goodness me - I would never correspond with anyone named Darren! Still, one has to move on I suppose and become part of the 'modern' set.
Jeremy has a problem with his expenses allowance, so Marbella may just become Morecambe this year. Jeremy says Morecambe is on the social list, but I'm not sure what he means by 'social'. Hopefully we can join up with our usual set and have a jolly time anyway.
Do Ronair do flights to Morecambe? And where is it exactly (geography was never my strong point at Bedales)?
Do you mean your friend has been in Toulouse, Darren? Or has she really been to the clinic again? Either way, I do hope she had a good time - and Robert too, of course.
It's been most enlightening 'talking' to you, Fiona says I could probably set up a soup kitchen now. Not sure how much call there would be for one in Hampstead, but I feel energised enough to enquire.
Rowena has a passing aquaintance with Jeremy Kyle and he said he would like you to go on his show sometime.
You'd have to smarten yourself up first, obviously.
Off now to re-do Jeremy's expenses. How they can turn down a claim for our labrador's pedicure is beyond me. I wish these people lived in the real world!!
My best regards to you, Roberto, also Darren and your family.