It was getting tough in 2006 and the workhouse still threatens us in 2011

ceridwen

shelley_crow wrote: »

I've cancelled my Sky subscription, it went up from the £33 it should be up to £45 a month and although it's our only indulgence, we can't afford it anymore. I was very angry with them when we were missold the contract, they admitted fault and gave me a couple of month half price but it's not good enough. I've had a few phone calls trying to tempt me back but the offers aren't good enough and all the discount in the workd won't repair my faith in them. Time to seek alternative services I think.

My life plan was always strighforward. I'd finish university at 21, get straight into a great job and be a homeowner by 25. I wasn't fussed by boyfriends. Hmm, life got in the way of that one a bit. I met OH at 18 and had DS a year after. I did finish university a couple of years later than planned but there's no jobs around in the sector I'm qualified in. House prices are totally through the roof and the chances of us being able to afford a mortgage that would be sustainable is next to zero. We have altered the plan slightly and are planning to emigrate in a few years time, lets see how that one goes!

My fathers life plan was to emigrate to a country with better chances - and then he met my mother and the rest is history:rotfl:. I tell him he got the better deal then...:rotfl:

I've met a kid before now barely out of short trousers and he told me his Life Plan - in great detail. It went through pretty much to retirement. When he told me about his family - I believed him that that was indeed the Life Plan and he would probably achieve it. That was a positive revelation to me for someone so young to have worked things out in such detail - but he obviously came from a rather better off background than my own and I just assumed that he was well used to seeing people around him planning their Life out in QUITE some detail.

My own personal Life Plan was more a set of automatic assumptions than a "concrete" Life Plan as such. I automatically assumed I would get married (at some point in my 20s). I hadnt really thought through "Children or no" issue - but I think basically realised I didnt want any, so wouldnt be having any. I made sure that any boyfriends I went out knew at the outset that I was never having any - so "move on in there if you want them yourself - as I'm not the woman for you if we get serious". I automatically assumed I would own my own house and move up the housing ladder after that until I got to the small detached house in reasonable area (that went wrong then - I only ever got A house - but not that one....:(:mad::(). I guess I assumed that I wouldnt have to do a full-time job until I retired (that went wrong then - I HAVE had to...:(). I certainly assumed I would always be in a passable level job with passable level salary whilst in work (that also went wrong:(:mad::().

So - not so much a fixed Life Plan - as a set of automatic assumptions about how my life would be - and I have realised what those assumptions were because I came across people with other assumptions about how Life is (both higher and lower than my own were). At that point it struck me that many of us DO have this automatic set of assumptions - but dont realise that fact unless we come across people from a different background and, with that, very likely a different set of automatic assumptions to our own.

So - having met people from a variety of backgrounds - both better and worse than my own - that DOES tend to lead to a mix of "WILL you darn well expect a bit more than you do from Life?" about some people and "WILL you darn well stop having such a huge sense of entitlement/total oblivion to people worse off than yourself through no fault of their own?" on the other hand. Whatever Set of Assumptions we have about life is, to us, I guess usually totally hidden/automatically assumed and maybe we dont tend to realise that a lot of other people have a different one and operate on that basis instead. We think our own one is "the way things are" and it can sometimes be difficult to get our head round people either expecting less than ourselves on the one hand or more than ourselves on the other hand...

mags50_2

I think the need is starting to manifest to have some sort of regulation of scrap merchants and the like (ie the places where these characters are selling their stolen goods) in order to try and ensure that scrap merchants have to make some sorta check as to whether their prospective sellers have the right to sell on whatever-it-is to them or no. Some sorta way of proving they actually own whatever-it-is they are selling...

Thats already started in our area.
Hasn't stopped people still nicking cables etc.
Telephones in one village were cut off twice in a few days.

ceridwen

This Life Plan scenario has certainly got me pondering now for the evening...:rotfl:

So - one thing that has struck me recently is I had the perfect parents for what I personally had chosen from this life. I think I wanted ones who would instil some sort of self-discipline in me and awareness of how things were for people both better off and worse off than myself. Ones that would teach me about not being selfish and not being over-emotional and a "drama queen" if (when...:cool::() things went wrong in my life and figure out how to deal with it. Ones that would teach me that a lot of life IS just plain bl**dy boredom and "doing ones duty" and getting on with things and making the best of them. Ones that would teach me about the concept of making sure I "pay my way" and dont expect a free ride in anything. Ones that have taught me (because they come from different backgrounds/expectations to each other) about this automatic set of assumptions people usually have about how their life will be and trying to adapt to someone with a different "set of assumptions".

There are things where I disagree with them (very strongly....) - and they know it and its an exercise for me to learn how to adapt to people who think its okay to do things I personally abhor - whilst not accepting those things personally and for them to accept that I feel entitled to "follow my conscience" and will do so regardless if its that important to me. I think we all realise that I have a set of parents that are very different to me in some respects - and there has had to be a lot of adaptation (on both their and my part) for us all to accept that they had a child that is so different to them in many ways. But - overall - we have all come to appreciate what its like to be so intimately connected to someone who is very different to ourselves and my guess is that its been a useful experience for all of us to BE so strongly connected to someone very different to ourselves and then have to get on and live with it and make the best of it.

Frugalista

ceridwen - as you, personally, feel so strongly about this "Life Plan" issue maybe you would be best to start a separate thread - thus avoiding taking this latest incarnation of the "It's tough" thread any further off on a tangent.

taurusgb

Well I'm still posting using my phone from my hospital bed, I've been here 7 days now and am being kept in over the weekend for further observation. due to see consultant again on Monday........ *deep sigh*

I was talking to my DH this afternoon about how scary it is all getting again and he was telling me about a conversation in his office between 2 people who where openly admiting to being proud possessors of numerous credit cards plus an overdraft each. Neither of them seemed at all worried about their debt levels and were convinced that they would only need to start worrying if they couldn't meet the minimum monthly payments. Given that the company manufactures parts for new cars (how many people are likely to be buying a new car as the economy worsens?) and given that they are both only on 6 month temporary contracts I think they have a big wake up call looming!

DH had to do some shopping for the first time in months and was shocked at the price of things....maybe my enforced absence from home has one or two disguised blessings attached.

Aplogies for any spelling/grammatical errors - it is a real pain using my mobile to post & I haven't got enough stamina to check it before I post.

lizzyb1812

Hi Taurus

It's lovely that you are keeping in touch even in hospital. Wish I'd thought of that a few years ago when I had to spend 11 days in hospital on a very noisy six bed side ward. I just had DVDs on my laptop which I played over and over to ward off the mindless boredom.

It seems your OH has had a bit of a wake up call re the cost of stuff so that's no bad thing.

I used to have a colleague who was a temporary contract worker like myself - we were paid well and she spent all she was paid plus used her credit cards. I paid myself the going rate for a similar permanent job and saved the rest. At the end of the assignment I could happily afford not to work and look around for a good next assignment whilst she was forced to take really yucky stressful jobs just to make ends meet. And that was in the good days - nowadays she'd be in real trouble!

Hope things get sorted out soon. If you need to make a stand then do so - at least they should be able to tell you what it is NOT, which may go some way to easing your mind.

Best wishes

Lizzyb

hornetgirl

Hugs to Softstuff and Taurusgb.

The whole FTSE thing has really unnerved me today. Normally my work colleagues wouldn't dream of discussing such things but it was a real talking point today. Most of them will be made redundant early next year (not me, I'm only on a fixed contract until the end of October) and I think that coupled with today's events really hit hard, with realisation dawning about just how tough times ahead are likely to be.
I don't think I've ever been a hoarder, although I do like to have well-stocked cupboards, but I think I will be upping my stock levels over the next few weeks in an effort to combat rising prices. I was reading on another thread that food is going up now because of the quantitative easing measures taken by the government a while back. I don't pretend to understand the cause and effect fully, but it does seem to make sense.

HariboJunkie

Frugalista wrote: »

ceridwen - as you, personally, feel so strongly about this "Life Plan" issue maybe you would be best to start a separate thread - thus avoiding taking this latest incarnation of the "It's tough" thread any further off on a tangent.

I have to say I've enjoyed the debate and found it quite enlightening but in light of this post (quoted below) last night from Ceridwen I am sure she will be in agreement that a new thread would be best.

ceridwen wrote: »

Well - at that point - this thread is not about one person - myself or anyone else...

So - can I suggest we get back to the topic under discussion?:) - as personal discussions etc are not appropriate in this context.

Taurus it's good to see you posting. xx

Good also to see some posters delurking :hello:

Back from a hard day's (mostly) window shopping and catching up with much loved family.

Off to read the news.....

grandma247

We need to be content and to feel safe in our own little spaces, whatever they may be, like a hedgehog all rolled up

What a lovely mind picture that makes.

I swear the beans tasted better sliced longways

That is not such a strange idea, anything that is cut up small tastes better, I can't remember the science but I think the more surface area that is exposed the more of the natural sweetness you can taste. Just think of grated carrots.

Ida_Notion

kittie wrote: »

The bean slicer is by krisk and I swear the beans tasted better sliced longways

Thanks for that. For the record, the one I had that fell apart on first use was a Tala, about half the price of the fiver or so that the Krisk is on eBay. For anyone else about to climb the giddy ladder of bean slicer ownership, it might be best to skip the first rung - you definitely seem to get what you pay for here