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Selling a half share in a house

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Comments

  • Ames
    Ames Posts: 18,459 Forumite
    Ames - don't forget you can only control yourself and the things you do. You have no control over the actions of your dad and sister. I think you have to do the best you can with the estate etc but I think you will need some legal advice
    1) in case dad/sister start doing work before the estate is sorted. They've already started doing work, replacing windows so far. They're due to do the kitchen sometime next month, dad's already started buying stuff.
    2) surely they can't do work if one party ie you is unhappy anyway? They can if they just ignore my thoughts, which they are doing.
    3) if Sister refuses to sell or
    4) agrees to sell but then stalls things or drags things our so buyers walk out. These two are my big worries.
    I would go to the CAB and find out where you can get legal advice - maybe a community legal centre? Last time I needed legal advice I went to CAB, followed the advice of the solicitor they referred me to, and got sued. I've had a local solicitor's recommended to me. Once I get one of the insurance/death benefit payments it looks like I'll have to go see them, I've got too much on my plate right now to try and stand up to dad and sis. I had a glucose tolerance test last week and need to see the specialist nurse about the result, which is worrying me, on top of other problems I've got right now.
    Best of Luck
    df

    Thanks, I'm going to try and only deal in emails with them so they can't bully me, and just see how it goes over the next few days.

    I think it's pretty disgusting that neither of them have been in touch, they must have read the email by now. It doesn't bode well for things being sorted amicably.
    Unless I say otherwise 'you' means the general you not you specifically.
  • heathcote123
    heathcote123 Posts: 1,133 Forumite
    edited 27 July 2011 at 10:55PM
    Ames wrote: »
    I don't think he's trying to screw me for half an electric bill, but once the final reading goes in it all gets more finalised. He's definitely doing what he can to slow things down - throwing away post and things.

    Originally he wanted to buy mum's house, have us pay to do it up, and us give him 10k, or buy him a car. A lot of his motives come from thinking he was screwed in the divorce (which to be fair, he was) and wanting us to make it right.

    He's had this plan to buy the house from the day mum was diagnosed with cancer. I'd go round to his house after spending time with her and find notepads filled with prices and figures for doing it up. So no, he's not screwing me for the electric bill, but he is determined to get his way regardless of the impact on me.

    Renting it out would still leave me vastly out of pocket, as the total rental would be less than my lost benefits. Plus there'd be all the responsibility of being a landlord, which I'm really not up to.

    Do you know thats his plan, or is that an assumption?

    I just ask because you mentioned he was saying not till sell it till spring? which would be a bit of an odd thing to say if he was intending on buying it.

    He can't force you to sell it to him, whatver your sister wants, it will need to go to market. Like others have said, you really seed legal representation on this, as it's going to get messy if people aren't being straight with each other.

    Very dim of them to be spending money on improvements at this stage...
  • Ames
    Ames Posts: 18,459 Forumite
    Do you know thats his plan, or is that an assumption? It's his plan. Since the day mum was diagnosed, he's been saying that he wants to sell his house and buy mum's when she died.

    I just ask because you mentioned he was saying not till sell it till spring? He says not to sell till Spring, if we just put it on the market. If we sell to him, we'll have to wait till Spring for him to put his house on the market. which would be a bit of an odd thing to say if he was intending on buying it.

    He can't force you to sell it to him, whatver your sister wants, it will need to go to market. Sister's refusing to let it go to market, as if dad buys it we save on fees and solicitors. Like others have said, you really seed legal representation on this, as it's going to get messy if people aren't being straight with each other. Oh everyone's being straight with each other, I know exactly what the plans are, it's just that the plans throw me into trouble and no-one cares about that.

    Very dim of them to be spending money on improvements at this stage... I agree, but when I point that out, I get told that it doesn't matter how much is done if dad's going to buy it, and if we sell to someone else then it'll add value. And wont listen to any arguments about it not adding value.

    Sadly, it is looking like legal advice is needed.
    Unless I say otherwise 'you' means the general you not you specifically.
  • Having read all this, so much has come flooding back as I was involved in a similar case when my mum died a few years back and her partner was involved (mum and dad divorced many years ago but she didnt re-marry).

    I too had to threaten the legal action route to try and kick on with things. In one way it worked as after 15 months of mums death I got paid out, not everything but enough to buy a house for me and my family in cash so we have no mortgage, so in effect mum would be happy with what she left me.

    What she probably wont be happy about is the way me and my sister had a go at each other and ultimately stopped talking to each other and this has continued onwards, she blames me, I blame her etc... We were very close just before mum died, now I dont think we have spoken to each other in about 6 months, maybe the odd text message to sort family birthdays.

    Id love to offer you some advice but sadly the tale differs in that mum had insurance, her mortgage was paid off so we didnt have to worry about that. I was pushed into waiting till the spring boom to sell, but it didnt make the slightest bit of difference in the price. Neither did doing numerous DIY jobs to move the price up as one half of the family kept reiterating to me. At the end of the day, theres always buyers out there all year round and keeping in on hold for ages wont effect the price too much, so your dad should just bang his on the market now if he wants it that much.

    Just all the tales of arguing with sister, waiting for probate, contacting creditors etc.... Its just all come flooding back.

    Good luck, and I hope you get sorted in the end.
  • Ames
    Ames Posts: 18,459 Forumite
    Wildcatarmy, I'm so sorry you've been through this too.

    I've had a text from sister saying I 'obviously didn't liste to a word she said' and that she's 'not going to dignify my email with a reply'. Although she did say dad's getting his house valued next week, which is a step forward.

    Then DIAL phoned and said that the DWP will sanction me if I use my inheritance to buy a house, even though it'd save about twice as much in housing benefit throughout my lifetime as it'd cost, and this place isn't suitable for my needs.

    At least I've got a doctors appointment this afternoon so I'll hopefully find out whether or not I have diabetes, so that'll take away a lot of worry.
    Unless I say otherwise 'you' means the general you not you specifically.
  • Ames
    Ames Posts: 18,459 Forumite
    On top of everything else, my GP has just told me I have diabetes.

    How much more is going to go wrong in my life.

    If this were fiction no-one would believe it.
    Unless I say otherwise 'you' means the general you not you specifically.
  • dancingfairy
    dancingfairy Posts: 9,069 Forumite
    Oh crumbs, it does sound like a right mess right now. I can't believe you would be sanctioned for buying a house with your inheritance? - it sounds crazy.
    I also can't believe that you sister has started work on a house she doesn't even own yet :eek::eek:.
    With the diabetes thing - at least it's been caught so hopefully they can control it and perhaps if you have been feeling ill recently you might feel better with the right medication?
    Hope things start to improve soon for you.
    Best of Luck
    df
    Making my money go further with MSE :j
    How much can I save in 2012 challenge
    75/1200 :eek:
  • Ames
    Ames Posts: 18,459 Forumite
    Oh crumbs, it does sound like a right mess right now. I can't believe you would be sanctioned for buying a house with your inheritance? - it sounds crazy. I know it's crazy. I did some rough sums, and assuming I live to be 65 (although that's looking very over optimistic now), it'll cost twice as much in HB as it would cost for a house, and that's not factoring in rent increases. But the DWP will say I bought a house just so that I could qualify for benefits. I'd actually be doing it to a) save the state money, and b) to buy somewhere that meets my needs. Especially now with the diabetes, living somewhere with heating is quite important for my health. Not to mention that this place is damp and mouldy, and has a kitchen that doesn't even have room for a perching stool which makes using it difficult.
    I also can't believe that you sister has started work on a house she doesn't even own yet :eek::eek:. It's worse than that, it's dad who's started work on a house we don't own. Sister's going to get involved when it comes to putting in a new kitchen, since spending a grand will add tens of thousands of value... in lala sister and dad lala land.
    With the diabetes thing - at least it's been caught so hopefully they can control it and perhaps if you have been feeling ill recently you might feel better with the right medication? Actually, I've not got any symptoms - I've been feeling ill because of the stress and my MI. Which is a good thing, since it means it's really early to be found out - 7 months ago my tests all came back normal. My GP said to see it as a hassle rather than major problem, and it is the most minor of all my health problems. She said it probably wont even need medication, just a healthy diet. I'm scared though that when I go manic or depressed I wont bother keeping on top of it. Hopefully though I can get enough support - a CPN, or maybe the district nurse coming out weekly.
    Hope things start to improve soon for you. Well, I don't think they can get worse!
    Best of Luck
    df

    Thanks, it's all just so overwhelming, everything coming on top of each other like this.

    That's why I'm definitely handing stuff over to a solicitor, I've got far too much on my plate right now and need to delegate and prioritise.
    Unless I say otherwise 'you' means the general you not you specifically.
  • JasX
    JasX Posts: 3,996 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Why not just put it on the market for an unrealistically high asking price and refuse any offers under?..... everyone should be happy that way and if it does sell you've all made an extra 30-80k :)
  • Ames
    Ames Posts: 18,459 Forumite
    Because sister says if we do that, when it comes to the time she's ready to sell we'll have to drop it to less than it's actual value because it's been on the market so long.
    Unless I say otherwise 'you' means the general you not you specifically.
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