School starting age, please advise

Soniclord

rachbc wrote: »

wow - another one amazed that you didn't know this - its pretty much all anyone with a rising 5 year old that I know has talked about all year! Our school preference forms came by post but the nursery also should have told you too.

Well firstly hard to understand your post as it's not gramatically correct or makes sense! But I think you meant to say "It's pretty much anyone who have children coming up to 5 years old whose parents you know, and they've talked about their children going to school all year"

And talked about it all year? Wow they must lead really dull lives lol.

I do agree though the nursery SHOULD have told me.

M_A_R_I_E wrote: »

Again, can't believe you did not know this?? Surely everyone works out in their head when their child will start nursery, school etc...

Well believe it.... Like I've already said I did not know and that's that! And how would I know to work out when my child starts school when I've never had experience of such things.... And bear in mind this is my 1st child coming up to school age! So get down off your high horse..

Thanks for your reply anyhow..

M_A_R_I_E wrote: »

I would def try to get your daughter into Reception class this Sept - she will have missed so much socially and emotionally by missing a whole school year?

I totally disagree with the above, she won't have missed so much at all! And if Reception class was so important then why are you allowed to defer your children from going to a school until they reach 5 years old!

And sorry but saying she will have missed so much socially and emotionally that is utter rubbish. She gets a lot of social time with children in nursery, and their are LOTS of children to 'socialise' with in nursery, also she won't have missed anything emotionally because she has an extremely loving big family and gets all the emotional support she will/could ever need.

Thanks for your input though. I just don't agree with all this stereotypical nonsense. I know my own child better than anyone. And to agree with stereotyping is just plain stupid in my opinion.

Spendless wrote: »

Hiya,

I live in Doncaster too My 2 chidlren are 8 and 11 and they went to the attached school nursery. Back then I 'put their name down' at the school with their details. This did not guarantee me a place or mean I didn't have to do an application. What it did do is the application form (that comes out the year before) was sent from the school. Otherwise notices go up around the town eg in the big supermarkets Tesco/Sainsburys that say 'Do you have a child born between x date and y date' then you need to apply for nursery/reception/yr 3 junior/secondary' you can get an application by contacting ........... or applying on-line'

What it sounds like to me is you never saw any of these notices. I am a bit surprised they never had any up at the private nursery you use.

Doncaster has always had 1 start date, the September following the child's 4th birthday.

You can defer, it is on Doncaster council's website that you can do this. 2 kids in my daughter's year did so (it worked out for 1 and not the other). Reception is the 'introductory' year. Formal learning starts in yr 1. Reception has some work in it but plenty of playing.

If you want to PM me the area you live in, it might be that I know something of the schools already. eg if it's somewhere my kids or my friends kids go.

Thanks for your reply , I will pm you shortly.

apples1 wrote: »

I have a feeling now I think about it that it is being regsitered with your GP that gets your address in the system which they then use to send the letter asking you to select a school. Was your daughter registered with the correct DOB at the GP in the area that you lived?

Just a thought and doesn't really help going forward.....!

I mean no disrespect but of course my child was registered with the correct DOB with the GP in the area that we lived! And no they also didn't send any letters out. Now after speaking to my Local Authority yesterday, they informed me that they don't send letters out anymore! And they said only if a child is registered with a nursery attached to a school does it get them 'in the system' so to speak. And it would then be the school that gives them a letter explaining it all.

Thanks anyway.

SpikyHedgehog wrote: »

Must admit OP, I do think your child's nursery have been a wee bit slack about not asking you if you realised you had to apply. As a key person in a preschool, I've been asking all my key children's parents since last December if they realised they needed to apply & if they'd done it.

I agree they have been a little slack! Not because of the fact they didn't tell me we had to apply but due to telling me much later than they should have, bearing in mind I wouldn't have known about it as this is our 1st child coming up to/being at school age.

Js_Other_Half wrote: »

We are sent nothing by the LEA in this area, it's up to the parents to find out about this - perhaps by being psychic if this is their first child?!

It is our 1st child coming up for school, we do have another child whose 2 and a half. We now know what WE need to do to make sure she is in school at the correct time.

Anyway thanks for all the replies once again, and apologies if I missed anything.

And we've decided, partly because I don't/can't drive as yet that we are keepping our daughter in nursery and starting her in school in September next year, and the school we want to get her in that we know is a very good school would mean we'd have to get 10 buses per week (Mon-Fri) which would be a struggle right now what with working and due to not living in the village we are moving back to, and bearing in mind right now our daughter currently attends nursery in the village we are moving back to and that's the same village where the very good school we want her to attend is. Had we known she was coming up to starting school then we would never have moved out of that village.

And here are the reasons (if anyones bothered) why we've decided to keep her in nursery and defer till next year.

Right now she attends nursery Monday, Thurs and Friday 1-6pm (15 hours per week) which works well for us AND her right now, if we were to put her in school which I believe the start time would be 8.30am-3pm?? We would have to get up every day at about 6.30am with a 2 year old as well! Get them ready and make sure we got to the school for 8.30am, which currently isn't feasible at all and would no doubt mean she would end up missing days at school and we would end up getting fined! So it makes sense to keep on doing what we are doing now and move back to the village where the school is she will be attending.

Some might think it's selfish. some might not, I DON'T.. Because it means she won't miss nursery any days, we will still be able to get to work, and won't be constantly knackered, which anyone who has children knows is not a good thing! As it makes it ten times harder to cope with everything.

Thanks for all your input. I appreciate it even if I don't agree with all of it

P.S) Almost forgot to reply to this.

Kimitatsu wrote: »

Funding will continue until September 2012, and to be honest children at that age fall in and out of friends constantly so your daughter will fit in just fine whenever she goes. Ultimately only you can decide what is best for YOUR child.

Good luck

Thanks for your post and I agree 100% with all the above. Children do fall in and out of friends constantly and my daughter will fit in fine whenever she goes, and I thank you for realising only I can decide what is best for MY child.

@ Everyone else

Obviously we all need help and information, which is what these forums are for. But we don't have to agree with everything that's said, and that's when people start to take offence for no good reason.

erdd2

3 kids, all male

School entry

1 Oldest in class due to birth date
2 One of youngest in class due to being borderline age and parents encouraging, kid passing tests for early entry...accepted
3. Youngest in class by birthdate

Prominent feature in adulthood

1. Am the oldest am the man!
2. Back off with the expectations!
3. Ain't life wonderful, wots the ish!

Just some fodder for your concern

pleasedelete

You still need to contact the LA and apply for a place which you can then defer. Otherwise she might not be able to get a place to start in year 1.

If a place is available where you want you need to apply for it to effectively hold it. Otherwise it may go during the year. The infant class size means that places are limited in most schools.

If you chose to start her in year 1 that is your choice (although with 20 years experience as a teacher, head teacher, LA adviser, inspector etc not one I would personally chose for my child) but you still need to apply for a place now.

You can only defer a place if you have one in the first place.

go_cat

Its your decsion after all to defer school but have you thought about how much older your daughter will be than her peers at nursery and has the nursery got the staffing / time to support an older childs development.

The reason I say this is because where my DS is at nursery he is in a room that has 3-4 year olds so up to school age and he is bored senseless now because he has learnt all they can teach him for the ages they deal with / OFSTED guidelines for this age group and he is so ready for school its going to be a long summer holidays

It would not be fair to my DS to hold him back for another year with children up to 2 years younger than him emotionally and developmentally

But as I said its not my child ........

kingfisherblue

I respect the OP's decision, although it is not one that I would make for my child. My concern is that the children in the nursery will all be younger than the OP's child. This could make a difference when she starts in year 1 - she may not have gained the skills that the school will teach from the beginning, which promote some independence and maturity to the correct level of the age group.

The child will also have missed out on a full year when friendship groups are made. I know that friendships are very fluid at this age, but groups of friends tend to stick together and she may find it difficult to establish herself as part of the group.

The OP has already stated that she has a preference for a good school, and that it would be difficult to get her daughter there and back each day, but it is quite possible that there are no places left there anyway - and there may be no places next year either. So it could be that she has to consider a different school, which may or may not be convenient to get to. The LA only has to offer a place at the nearest suitable school - for most children, this is any primary, although there are exceptions for children with special needs (whose needs may be better met at another school that is further away) or for children who follow a particular religion. The LA won't take into account whether it is a good school or not.

bestpud

FWIW I think you've made the right choice, OP.

We have an obsession with setting tiny kids off on the educational 'treadmill' early and teaching them ASAP to conform. Let's be honest, all this talk of them knowing the school routine basically means they've had a year of moulding already and know how to do what is expected by staff who have 30 other kids to control.

It will not do your child any harm to start later, OP, and in fact an extra year where she has time at home with you but also a nursery for socialising may actually do her a lot of good!

The social argument is absolute rubbish! Children dip in and out of peer groups at this age! Of course they do - they are still developing! When people have lifelong friends from this age, it is usually because
the parents got on as well tbh!

Of course it would be ludicrous to make her get up at stupid hours and endure more hours of transport just so she can start school now! How can any parent justify that for a four year old??

Don't worry about her missing out at nursery - she will be fine and a good nursery will ensure they provide activities that stretch her.

That's my thoughts anyway! All this scaremongering is not on tbh!

We shouldn't forget that a lot of parents don't even think about their child - they just see school as free childcare and the easy option!

blue_monkey_2

Just one thing though and no-one seems to have mentioned this, it seems the OP is 'assuming' that he will get the 'school of his choice' and his daughter can just start in Y1.

If, as you say, the school is a good one then Year 1 will already be full. You can appeal yes, but if they find you moved to the village, and are renting just to get into that school, you will more than likely be refused. We have been to appeal and it was the first question they asked us, how long was the tenancy - for us it was HA housing so our tenancy was for life.

Classes get filled in Reception year and unless someone leaves, there is usually not room for children to just 'join in', you make that choice when you choose not to start your child at Reception age. If you want her into that specific school then you make plans. Early. My childrens school is full, moving to the village now would be tough for anyone as there are absolutely no spaces - some new village children have even been declined admission and go outside the village, even though there are children from over a mile away in class. It is full. Yes, they can appeal but as they have moved there on a short term let or have not bought a house, they'll be refused.

We appealled to get DS into class, we got in because his sister managed to get a space (sibling rule) and because we were in Housing Association housing so would not be moving out any time soon. It was the first thing they asked us, how long is your tenancy for - for us it was secure and for life.

I would be careful about assuming she can just waltz into Year 1 and get her in, if the school is the best in the area it will be full and that ship would had sailed. You should have applied for her to go into reception in September had you really wanted to get her in otherwise you'll go on the list and if someone leaves then you'll get a call, but it will still mean her moving schools. There will be more parents like you.

To me, it sounds like the Nursery is more than happy to keep on taking your money. All good Nurseries would be advising on when applications to get children into school, should be made and they will be advising on local schools.

Do not just assume the local one is bad from what you hear, things change, teachers change, heads change, pupils change. Whatis right for one child is not right for another. Our school had a dire OFSTED report but it was very out of date and it is a brilliant school. Being moved here was the best thing for my children. We had no choice on where to live though.

balancelife

Since it seems quite hard for you to understand the school system I just wanted to make sure you understand what you need to know now you've made your choice to not send her until next September:
1) your child will not do the reception year (she wont be starting late and doing that year)
2) your child will go straight into year 1
3) If the reception class at the school is full and all the children are staying on to year one you will not get a place at that school.
4) you will need to find a school that has a place for a year 1 child, not a reception year child.
5) you need to find out where has spaces and get her name down.

And then some information that I would have thought everyone knew but then I thought everyone knew when to send their first born to school:
Schools start in the morning somewhere between 830-9 am and last until 3-330pm.
Your child goes Monday to Friday
You have to make choices about lunch - find out what the school does, packed lunch or school dinners.
Most schools have a uniform they have to wear every day.
They may have homework after school.
They have to go every day or you need to write in to explain why they are ill etc
There tend to be rules about holidays


I could go on.

Find out IF she can get a place for YEAR 1 at your chosen school. Go and talk to the school, look round it and find out what you as a parent are supposed to do and need to know about their school life.

Finally - you cant put all the blame on "not knowing". You are a parent and its your job to find information and advice and not just expect it to be handed to you on a plate. Think ahead. How much further will you not know about important things in your childs life?? and simple things like remembering when sports day is so you can be there, parents evening, non uniform day etc etc. My childs school dont remind me about those things, I have to remember after receiving newsletters etc.

Finally - my child is still 4. she is just finishing reception and ready to go into year 1. she'll be 5 on the 12th August. I knew about when to send her to school and she is my first born. In fact I made sure I had her name on the list for the school when she was 2 as its such a popular school. In reception she has learnt to read in the way her school teaches them (phonics) and maths and play and friendships. SHe has also learnt along with the rest of the class how to carry a tray with lunch on it, sit still in assembly, the rules of the school, what the bell means, where everything is and how to behave in the way they expect. The teachers said all this is important in preparing them for year 1 so they can be confident and settled, ready to learn.

bestpud

balancelife wrote: »

In reception she has learnt to read in the way her school teaches them (phonics) and maths and play and friendships. SHe has also learnt along with the rest of the class how to carry a tray with lunch on it, sit still in assembly, the rules of the school, what the bell means, where everything is and how to behave in the way they expect. The teachers said all this is important in preparing them for year 1 so they can be confident and settled, ready to learn.

'The teachers said...'. Must be right then! :rotfl:

Most of us teach our children to socialise - not sure who leaves that to schools...?

Fabulous life skills and I'm so glad your daughter has learnt all this at four. Good grief!!! Just imagine
she didnt know what the school bell meant until 5!!! She could have ended up in prison by the age of 14!!! Thank goodness for great parents like yourself! Give yourself a pat on the back for letting someone else teach your daughter life skills! :cool:

I won't even start on the damaging effect of not being able to carry a tray of food at 5! :rotfl:

Seriously - get over yourself!!

There is more to being a parent than putting them down for school at 2 and carting them off to learn things you could teach them yourself! I realise you wanted shot of your dd ASAP but not all parents do, and it doesn't make them a bad parent!

balletshoes

bestpud do you send your children to school? I'm just wondering, because whether you think its a valuable life lesson or not, if children are to go to formal education, they do have to learn to carry food trays, they do have to learn to sit still (ish) and pay attention etc.

If you don't send your children to school, I can understand that these are issues which would not affect you or your children in the same way. I'm not having a go at you bestpud, I am just curious - as whether its age 4 or age 5 for starting school, once they are there they do have to conform to the rules - and whats wrong with that?

For what its worth, I don't treat school as free childcare, never have (if you're a working parent school hours can actually mean more issues than having a nursery place does). My DD enjoys school and learning, she always has, and I think its the right environment for her.