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Horace's Biting the Bullet Diary

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Horace
Horace Posts: 14,426 Forumite
edited 16 July 2011 at 8:06PM in Debt free diaries
It is a long time since I had a diary - my old one being Horace's bootstraps when I was setting up a business. A lot has happened since then.

Today, I find myself in a spot of financial difficulty wondering how the heck I am going to pay for stuff since my main client pulled the rug from under me last week so instead of getting just over £200 a month in income (this went to business account and some diverted into my personal account) to zip, zilch, nowt, nothing!

I could curse the fact that I ended up paying £100 for one night in a hotel in central London on Monday plus 2 lots of cab fares (one from coach station to hotel and one from the West End at mid night to Earls Court) all because I had been promised a VIP Green Card for a one off concert at the Palladium - turns out that I had been forgotten about:mad: If I had known I would have gone back the same night on the coach.

I get working tax credits which have now been reinstated to £51 a week (they had dropped to £24 a week after I had been given duff advice and told to put an amount in a box that should have had zero in it:mad:).

I have decided to bite the bullet and get a job that pays money whilst still trying to run two businesses (I am hoping that the guy who did the logo for the latest business will give me some leeway with his invoice). I have registered with various agencies and have applied for two jobs (I am working on the application for a third which has to be submtted by Monday). On a good note, I did hear back from one job who have told me that my CV is being reviewed by the interview panel and that they will get back to me in 10 days time because they want to interview me (the panel all work full time in other jobs). This will be for an 8hr a week job which is self employed but I will get between £8-£10 an hour which is more than I got for previous client. It is something that I really want to do because it uses my organisational skills and the contacts I have built up already. It would be a real feather in my cap if I got it. :D

It doesnt help that I keep being nagged by previous client (he is also a friend) about my latest business and how I would get more people buying into the idea if I promoted it more and got different people through the door...all I get is nag nag nag. I know what I have to do, I am doing it already but there are only so many hours in the day - I have to eat, cook and clean etc. because there is no-one else to do it - it is ok for him he has a wife and kids who help out. I hate feeling pressurized and I am also starting to feel as though I am stupid - I know I am not stupid before anyone says anything.

Plan for the week: complete application for latest job (10-4) - it is fairly local and I can do everything even the desirables on the job description. Do the stuff for the business club that I am in (have unpaid job on the committee) although I am not looking forward to Tuesday because I have to be there yet cannot afford the £10 it will cost me for dinner.:(

Tomorrow, photograph stuff and list it on Ebay - must get rid of this wedding carp that has been hanging around. I have other stuff to sell as well so there is no point in being lazy, I have to take photos and upload it all and get rid.

Monday, run networking group (people pay me for this) and go to bank to put in HB cheque (am sick of being in my overdraft).

Tuesday, run second networking group.

Wednesday, Thursday, Friday do marketing and job searching.

Must also see what I can do about this depression I am in - I never used to suffer from depression until I worked for twerp back in 2007 (thanks to him I nearly ended up under a bus and in a wooden box:()

One thing that I will never do and that is walk away from my businesses which although struggling are what is keeping me sane. What do I do about the nag? I know that what i am being told is right, however, the nagging is getting on my nerves and my fuse is getting shorter and shorter. I am told by other people in business that the first two years are the hardest and boy were they right - I had started to see some light at the end of the tunnel until that was whisked away from me at the end of last week.

Just don't know what to do for the best really.

Sorry if this is a whinging whining rant but it helps to get it off my chest.
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Comments

  • Wordsmith
    Wordsmith Posts: 1,164 Forumite
    edited 16 July 2011 at 8:13PM
    Hello, Horace! Happy new diary. You will find a way through - you always do, so don't despair. You have huge energy and lots of ideas. Good luck - with job applications and continuation of your own business(es).

    Would it help to put one business on the back burner and really concentrate on the other? Just a thought - I am sure you've thought that one through.

    Do you know why your client no longer needs your services?
    "Green pastures are before me,
    Which yet I have not seen;"
    I'd love to be a good example - instead, I am a horrible warning.
  • Horace
    Horace Posts: 14,426 Forumite
    The events business is on the back burner although I have asked for a project brief to quote on for a conference in September. The networking business is the one I am concentrating on at the mo.

    Client has an apprentice starting in a couple of weeks plus his 16 yr old work experience (daughter) is in there for a couple of weeks or so both of which are cheaper than me. £7 an hour is a lot to miss, however, he has given me some other skills so maybe I can start writing blogs for people and doing all the SEO work on them because I was told by client that I am now an expert which is why a fair few of my networking business webpages are on the first page of Google because I have SEOd them myself:D

    It just makes me cross and sad because I have had an expensive couple of months - car tax, car service, car insurance plus other bills - it wasnt helped by the fact that I never noticed that the WTC had been reduced to £24 a week although that has now been increased again:j I keep getting bank charges too despite being on low income and I don't know what to do about them - I had thought of closing the account altogether and moving but I do know that I wouldnt be able to move to the Co-op because they don't like personal accounts and business accounts to be held by the same person.

    On another good note - I tweeted the other day that I was a freelancer for hire and as a result this chap who runs a consultancy business as well as offering bushcraft team building courses has gotten in contact with me and we are going to meet up when he returns from Canada.

    Tomorrow, I had better go to Waitrose (I don't normally shop in there) because I have some luncheon vouchers to use and I can at least buy some food with them. You must think that I am mad because I wept with the delight the other day because I found a tin of spam lurking in the back of the cupboard which i have been using for sandwiches using the old bread bought from the whoopsie shelf and kept in the freezer being used a slice at a time.

    I had thought of going to stand up the back of Rackhams but don't want to lower myself to that level - eww at the thought of it_pale_
  • Lula-Hula
    Lula-Hula Posts: 7,868 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Horace me old mucker,

    bienvenue back to diaryland. You are most definitely not stupid & I have very faith in you turning this current situation around.

    I look forward to more updates soon :)
  • beanielou
    beanielou Posts: 95,364 Ambassador
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Academoney Grad Mortgage-free Glee!
    Keep plodding.
    How much do you need to stand still IYSWIM?
    I am a Forum Ambassador and I support the Forum Team on Mortgage Free Wannabe & Local Money Saving Scotland & Disability Money Matters. If you need any help on those boards, do let me know.Please note that Ambassadors are not moderators. Any post you spot in breach of the Forum Rules should be reported via the report button , or by emailing forumteam@moneysavingexpert.com. All views are my own & not the official line of Money Saving Expert.

    Lou~ Debt free Wanabe No 55 DF 03/14.**Credit card debt free 30/06/10~** MFW. Finally mortgage free O2/ 2021****
    "A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of" Jane Austen in Mansfield Park.

    ***Fall down seven times,stand up eight*** ~~Japanese proverb.
    ***Keep plodding*** Out of debt, out of danger. ***Be the difference.***
    One debt remaining. Home improvement loan.
  • Horace
    Horace Posts: 14,426 Forumite
    Hello all.

    Last night I had a few brainwaves - I registered for free on Working-Bees.com in the hope of getting some work from that (it is a bit like People Per Hour only without their cut). I registered for event planning and SEO/Online Content work.

    I decided that as I am a member of Dudley & District Business Club who are there to support small businesses like mine, I would email the treasurer and the president (neatly avoiding the chairman who is the one that ditched me in favour of cheap labour - I cannot stand any more of his nagging/pressure). I sent an email to them this morning explaining that I cannot afford £10 for their meeting and about the financial difficulties that I am in and hoping that they would be able to help me out financially (they do have £9K sitting in the bank doing nowt:eek:).

    I received an email from Reed this morning which included a salary calculator and it seems that for secretarial temping I should be getting £8-11 an hour (oooooh). This morning i have applied for a job working for a small engineering company (I would negotiate the hours from 8.30-4.30 though for the days when I have my own business commitments to consider) - it is only £15K but it is better than £0 - they want to raise their profile on Google, with SEO, keywords, e-newsletters etc and although they said they wanted a graduate they would also consider someone self taught. Quite a few of my blog pages on my networking business website are on the first page of Google already and have been there since the website went live 6 weeks' ago...all SEO'd by me:D

    I will be emailing the graphic designer asking for some leeway with his bill too - fingers crossed that he will because I will be telling him that I have approached the DDBC for help. I hate owing money and hate being skint.

    I must get my head around Quick Sell and Advanced Sell on Ebay today too because these are the only listings that are free this weekend, then I need to take photos of things and work out postage. Maybe those designer wedding frocks should be listed after all and I would have to charge special delivery/courier rates because they are high value items. I also have some Clarins stuff (picked up from Mystery Shops - some of which are full sized freebies:cool:) that I can flog, plus I have all of twerp's DVDs. Can't believe that I felt myself missing him on Monday when I was at the Palladium:o I won't be venturing down that path again because I am far too good for him (he couldn't stand straight behind a corkscrew he is that crooked and spiteful). So ladies if you happen to be on meetup and come across a chap calling himself Loveangel, seriously successful medical professional, thirty something - you will know to avoid him. The reality is that he is no angel, he is rubbish in bed (more a wham bam thank you mam type plus he has stinky trumps:eek:), he is 44 so not 30 something and he is a mid grade civil servant who works for the MHRA so not a seriously successful medical professional at all. He is quite handy with his fists too especially when he has been drinking - he doesnt know when to stop and gets nastier and more paranoid the more alcohol he consumes, he tells that many lies too he wouldn't know the truth if it jumped up and bit him on his backside:rotfl: He can be charm itself when he wants to be and he prefers older women because they remind him of mummy who did everything for him (more of an Anthony Perkins character who had a thing for his mummy:rotfl:).

    Today, I am typing DDBC minutes and circulating them, emailing the graphic designer and doing (and emailing) the application for the Stroke Association job.

    It is sausages for tea with some aunt bessies and veg...I would stick them in a casserole but the oven has packed up:mad:
  • Horace
    Horace Posts: 14,426 Forumite
    In other news, I have emailed graphic designer (fingers crossed). I have been busy on LinkedIn because I found somewhere else to promote the business networking events. I have also asked for more recommendations on LinkedIn too.

    Am part way through the application form - just need to complete my attributes and the Equal Ops form, may do a covering letter as well and they can all be pdf'd and emailed.

    Need to do the minutes too but will deal with my stuff first - the minutes won't take too long. I still have the ebay listings to do which is a right pain in the posterior. I wish there was another way of selling stuff without going through ebay.

    I have a very early start for the next two days up at 5am and out of home at 6am although I could possibly leave a bit later on Tuesday but no later than 6.15am (can't do that Monday as I have to get the bus and I have to walk about two miles to the venue).

    I have not been to Waitrose to spend LVs either although I may drop in on Tuesday when I am kind of passing (I will be in Alcester on Tuesday and Waitrose is in Droitwich).
  • chevalier
    chevalier Posts: 7,937 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    You sound very focussed on getting in some money, and making new connections. As for the nagging person. Erm. I think in the end you have to assertively tell him that you have taken his advice under advisement. And that he doesn't need to keep on reminding you thanks all the same.
    chev
    I want a job that is less than an hour driving away from my house! Are you listening universe?
  • Horace
    Horace Posts: 14,426 Forumite
    Easier said than done Chev - this guy hosts my two websites although he is only charging me for webhosting for the event management one having allowed me to have free hosting for 12 months with the other. He nagged at me last year when I was networking with the other crowd to get and do my own but I didnt so I am guessing that he feels the need to crow about it. He has been quite good to me and I am kinda feeling beholden to him but what I won't be, is bullied. I have had enough of that with twerp that I ditched in Jan and the twerp I worked for at the Uni. I hate toxic people.

    I havent listed stuff on ebay at all - I spent an hour or so on the sofa watching moving wallpaper whilst I formulated what to write on the application for this job. I have never known a job be made just for me because I have all the essentials and all the desirables:D The forms have been done, turned into pdfs and sent.

    In other news the Treasurer of the business club has emailed me to say that I can go as his guest on Tuesday and no doubt there will be a conversation with him and the President over my situation. I know they have helped other businesses in the past but haven't done so for a long time so fingers crossed they will lend or give me some money.

    Just need to sort out those DDBC minutes - my stuff for my meeting on Monday morning has been done (wish me luck because I am having to stand up and give a talk on the Art of Negotiation {or how to get what you want by spending less money}). I know all about spending less and recently managed to get a 5 star hotel to charge me £15 a head for a client's product launch (unfortunately thus far the client hasnt been forthcoming with cash) when their normal rates are £35 per head for a half day.

    I had a little treat this afternoon too - oh my gosh, I hear you say - not to fret I did not spend any money, I remembered that I had a bar of Green & Blacks Cherry Choc in the fridge made with 60% cocoa and containing sour cherries so I treated myself to 4 small squares and put it back in the fridge (I have had this bar of choc now for over a month:j). I ate the last of the spam today too - that tin made me 6 sandwiches and the remainder I cut up into small slices and ate slowly. Gawd, I sound like a pauper (which I am). It is amazing though how some small things can really give you a lift:D.

    I have also been exchanging tweets with The Hairy Bikers and with ApprenticeTom whom I am hoping will win The Apprentice tonight.
  • startagain_2
    startagain_2 Posts: 2,135 Forumite
    Horace, Horace, Horace.....

    Firstly, well done for starting a diary of your own. I know what it is like to get a load of carp all at once and the need to put it all out there. Somehow, just putting it into words makes you read and reread it and try and make some sense of it all.

    We are living in ultra difficult times with the economy as it is and the likelihood of the "rug being pulled" is staring most of us in the face these days. It is a horrid situation and I feel for you.

    I crave security and I need it with the roof over my head, work and knowing that I am "looked after". Whilst I would like a man as well, only too often they have been the ones to pull the rug, so I am staying clear of that for now.

    With the nagging, all I can suggest is that you calmly point out that you are doing as much as you can, the best that you can, and trying to make it work and any positive ideas would be welcomed. Being a Mrs Gobby myself, I know that I wouldn't be able to leave it at that and it would end in a row. Thank heavens you are not me... :o

    Something will come up, I just know it. I have had some Godawful times over the last year or so and just as things seem to be on a permanent downer, one or two good things happen and the tide turns. With you it may be that returning to the realms of the Paid rather than Self Employed may give you the security and confidence to restructure and start again? Who knows?

    As regards the ex, I too have stray thoughts regarding mine, especially when something triggers my brain into stupidly thinking that he "wasn't that bad". I need to do what you have done and write a list of all the negatives and see that they far outweigh any positives that he bought into my life.

    Good Luck with the diary.
    Good Luck with the meetings.
    Good Luck with the job applications.
    Just.... Good Luck ;)

    A big hug

    SA
    2011 - New year, New start, New me
    [STRIKE]Planning on [/STRIKE] making my dreams a reality
  • Horace
    Horace Posts: 14,426 Forumite
    Morning all, I know I should be doing the bookings for tomorrow's meeting but I will do them a bit later.

    Had a fab meeting this morning and received invoice for last week's meeting which has been paid..at least it isnt overly expensive. I had a chat with one of my chums too about being nagged and he has suggested that I slowly withdraw contact and if I get phoned then make crackling noises and say that you're breaking up before disconnecting:rotfl: I am also contacting other friends to see what they charge for webhosting and will see if I can move my websites to them.

    The graphic designer has suggested I pay him £100 this month and the remainder by the end of next month which is doabe. The DDBC are being supportive too to a certain extent and now I feel as though I have some breathing space. Had to turn down a breakfast meeting just now because I cannot justify the cost and I told the chap that I was £200 down each month and couldn't afford it so he said to keep in touch which I will.

    I am now looking for another IT company to come to my meetings that way I can be rid of the nagger and his pet monkey. The pet monkey comes to the Monday meetings, does his introduction and doesnt participate in anyway shape or form and then goes back and whines that he doesnt know when the next meeting is - it is weekly for goodness sake..what is so difficult to understand about that? (insert banned shrug shoulders/confused smiley here).

    Went to the bank too to deposit my HB cheque - I am now back in the black:j (soon to be in the red again as I have to pay my virgin CC this week - must do it on Wednesday). I was really naughty too as I ventured into a new shop that has opened called BM Stores. This shop has set up in what was the old Woolworth's store in Northfield so it is quite big - in some respects it reminds me of Home Bargains next door so I espied a few things that mignt come in handy but succumbed to a packet of Foxes Coconut Crinkle biscuits for 49p - they cost more than that in Sainsburys and Tatcos. I will go into BM again because I noticed that they were selling All Purpose Miracle Grow liquid for £1.50 which I think is quite cheap.

    Jobs today, do the ring arounds for meeting tomorrow, complete DDBC minutes and send them off, contact Katie Bard to see about temp work (they have my CV). Also need to speak to accountant to see if she will give me more time to pay her invoice.

    Brought home some food from the breakfast meeting too - a pot of yoghurt (greek yoghurt with mixed fruit) and an apple although I do wish that I had taken the bananas too as I could have had them with custard and I should really have taken all the yoghurts (after all I have paid for them). Funny how catering for 4 gives you enough food for 8 people.
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