Divorce, cheapest option??

janthemum

Hi all,

Im a long time poster. My marriage has unfortunately broken down (no going back) kids are 19 and nearly 18. We own house, well mortgage paid in a yr on 220k house. im only 43 its my decision and feel I am young enough to start again. marrisge effectively broke down 5/6 yrs ago but i wanted to be around for kids to grow up and now youngest is off to uni in a yr and although i know it is having a great impact on them it is something that needs doing.

I know i may seem awful but i have devoted myself to them for last 10 yrs not working and being there for them and they have turned out wonderful kids and now it is my time to start my life.

I love my husband dearly but we have moved on forom each other.

Divorce and moving on is the only option. He has said he wants me out, which I didnt want but have negotiated I go if we get a QUICK divorce and come and see my daughter whenever I can. He feels he cant start a new life if im hee al be it if we live in different rooms.

Yes I have someone else but all very new would have done this anyway and would not be moving in with him will just get a room.

So...

How do I get a quick divorce..

Online?? anyone ant experiaence or do I take a loan out for 5k which I cant afford to push it through quick??

Apparantly you cant get legal aid any more??

Any advice greatly appreciated

janthemum

Any advice would be greatly appreciated thanx

harrys_nan

I believe the cheapest option would be a DIY divorce through the courts yourself but you need to phone your local court and ask about it as I'm not sure of any criteria
Your other bet is to go and see either a solictor or the CAB for advice

Emmzi

you do not really want a quick divorce

you want a fair divorce compenstaing you for the years you did not work, and raised the kids

odds on you will get ripped off if you do it yourself

get a solicitor for advice. it will be worth it.

zzzLazyDaisy

Emmzi wrote: »

get a solicitor for advice. it will be worth it.

I agree.

Okay, you may feel guilty at the moment and want to make things easier on everyone. But the fact is that you have invested a lot of your life in the marriage and raising your children.

A divorce isn't just about ending the marriage, it is also about dealing with the financial aspects. For example, re the house, the starting point is that you are each entitled to half the net equity. Does your husband have a pension? You have rights under the pension splitting laws. You will need to find somewhere to live and you will presumably want to have a spare bedroom so your children can visit.

Go and see a solicitor and find out what your rights are before you agree to anything.

lizzie169

If you able to decide between you what you will settle for then you can do it yourself just by ringing up the regisrty office and getting the relevant forms. My ex and I did this several years ago. We decided between ourselves the financial side of things then simply filled in the forms, and it cost about £150 (although that was 13 years ago)

LittleMrsThrifty

When you say your youngest is "nearly 18" have try just taken their A levels or will they be doing them next year? Your split would likely have a massive impact on their exams and possibly cost them a university place. If you've hung on 6 years, could you hang on one more?

I agree about seeing a solicitor.

janthemum

LittleMrsThrifty wrote: »

When you say your youngest is "nearly 18" have try just taken their A levels or will they be doing them next year? Your split would likely have a massive impact on their exams and possibly cost them a university place. If you've hung on 6 years, could you hang on one more?

I agree about seeing a solicitor.

Hi she is due to do her As in a year just done her As's, been predicted As and Bs and I have been goig to open days with her. I feel things have gone too far now as she is aware there is somone else in my life and yes is very angry but me and her dad sat down with the kids yesterday and re affirmed it is all over and unfortunately as parents we wont be together again, but will work together for the kids ie a hol is booked for 1st week in Aug and although we have been through all avenues what to do who should go it looks like we will all go and try and make it a good hol for the kids.

I have made a sol appt for Wed am first half hr free so will write all my points and qs down. I just want it over and done with and will rightly so get what I am entitled to but also want it easy for all involved. Unf I will have to get 5k loan out to pay for it not vvery mse but will instruct them to do it quick as I am paying. Been told ther is no legal aid any more so so be it.

Thanks for your comments.

kazzah60

my friend and her husband split after 23 years of marriage - fairly amicably - after 2 years they went to our local county court and filed for a divorce, there were not problems because they had been separated for 2 years and I believe it cost in the region of £300 ( this was 2009)

mackemdave

Have you thought what grounds you are going to use for this "quick" divorce.One of you is going to have to have grounds...adultery,unreasonable behaviour,2 years seperation...It might not be as quick as you both hope....Divorce and finacials are two seperate things...Wait till you try deciding who is going to get what...houses/pensions/investments etc all have to go into the pot

Fire_Fox

The divorce part is not expensive and the cost is generally taken out of the settlement money, it's the solicitors negotiating who gets what that can run up a massive bill. Both of you should have your free half hour with the solicitor of your choice, then attend mediation to agree who gets what. The solicitors then complete and file the basic paperwork with the court. If your solicitor is asking you to make payments on account or insisting they need to be involved every step of the way find another solicitor. The divorce will be quickest if you both agree the grounds, would you be willing to admit adultery? I don't mean that in an accusatory way, just that it is one practical solution to a quick and painless divorce.