child biting.

Cornish_piskie

davsidipp wrote: »

hi thanks for replies i did not know until today that he has been biting other children and on knowing am slightly annoyed he has not been stopped as i dont see why other children are the butt of his anger.this child is 2 and a half and the mother is not embarresed at all she feels it is the other children which if the parent was decent and said their child was wrong i would understand more but the mothers attitude has got my back up.the nursery have said its the first time they have encountered this problem but i do feel the children need to be safe away from this child as my grandson doe not want to be near him.

Sorry - from this part of your post I assumed that you had spoken to the mother.

So how do you know the mother is not embarrassed and she thinks it's the other children if you haven't spoken to her?

CH27

You need to speak to the head of the Nursery ASAP.

davsidipp

Cornish_piskie wrote: »

Sorry - from this part of your post I assumed that you had spoken to the mother.

So how do you know the mother is not embarrassed and she thinks it's the other children if you haven't spoken to her?

as i put in my post she feels it is other children who cuddle her child the reason for his biting and when i spoke to the nursery teacher whether the mother was sorry about the incident i was told flatley no,she said she was more embarresed telling the mother and the mum was not bothered.as i put in my post the nursery have said this is the first time they have had to deal with this situation so it is new to them but at the end day of the all im worried for is my grandson who has recieved these bites.

Cornish_piskie

Of course you are worried and you have every right to be - as myself and several posters have said, go chat to the manager, she must do her job and protect your little grandson and others before they are really hurt (physically or emotionally) I'm surprised the nursery haven't come across a biter before, I know several of my friends' little monsters, I mean darlings, have displayed this behaviour and it's certainly not uncommon.

shy-but-need-help

Definitely talk to them, they have a duty to protect the children in their care. If they are clueless then maybe suggest to them they need to bring in outside agencies like health visitor to see where they go in terms of help for this child as- whether his mother wants to acknowledge it or not- it's not going to set him up well for life in school if it's not got under control.

My youngest son has a boy in his class who was a scratcher, his mom was absolutely mortified and nursery was able to get help in for him- he now goes to a seperate group on a Friday where he's learning to deal with his emotions/actions (lots going on in his homelife) and it put a stop to it all to the point the little boy has friends now ready for when they head into reception (granted he still doesn't seem high on the birthday party invites as parents are slower to forget then the kids but he does have classmates now rather than a room full of captive victims!)

Do keep on at nursery, they have a duty to protect and as long as parents/grandparents are letting it lie they won't feel the need to act on what they see as an awkward situation. It does need dealing with.

Money_maker

Biting may not be uncommon but is something that the mother should have disciplined the child about before they got to 2 1/2 years old. There have obviously been no repercussions when the child did this so therefore they continue. Personally I think the parent has to teach the child as the nursery will be limited as to the punishments they can give and it's going to be pretty hopeless unless the parent backs them up and continues it outside the nursery.

My boys only tried it once each and my daughter about 3 times. They had a tap on the hand, a really loud shout, my nastiest look :eek: and were immediately put back down on the floor. Works.

meritaten

hun - you need to be taking photos of your childs injuries. sad to say, but the threat of legal action may well spur the nursery into taking more pro-active (shall we say) measures. I would be advising other parents to do this too - any injury during daycare should be documented not just by the nursery but parents too. if other children are being harmed then the threat of a mass pull out by parents may well result in this child being excluded. and if this child cannot control its biting tendency then it SHOULD be excluded!

pandora205

Biting is a tricky area for preschool settings but with a little thought it can be addressed. I'm a psychologist and have worked with a few settings on this and have devised an advice sheet (if OP would like to PM me I'll send a copy).

Basically, staff and parent/s need to identify the cause/function of the biting, as this gives clues to the intervention to stop it. For example some toddlers (and most babies) will be teething and like the biting sensation. The remedy for this is to provide teething toys, etc. as an alternative to flesh! Or staff may be giving lots of attention to the child (telling him off etc.) which provides masses of attention. In this case a short sharp 'no, that hurts' and removing the child will surfice. It is not a good idea to prompt other children to bite back as this can be copy cat behaviour and spread to others quite easily, and of course, it's giving a message that might is right. It's better for adults to comfort the victim and say how they must be sad because biting hurts.

davsidipp

we should have took photos the first time as the bite was very severe but we took it that itwas a one off but now this is a 3rd time and others are being bitten think nursery need to shape up to this.the nursery has a good ofsted and the girls are good that work there but i do feel peeved about this situation, maybe im getting older and some things are tolerated more today but i can honestly say i never had that when my 2 were at school nursery 20 years ago and if it was they would not have let it go on.moneymaker i agree with your post the mother needs to drum into her child biting is wrong but we dont know if this going on but i can only say if it wasmy child i would feel ashamedat what is going on.