9 yr old DD cries when going to school

carrieuk

From a child POV, I used to cry going to school up to about year 6. I hated my form tutor in year 5. He was arrogant and shouted at me, I still remember it now at 24! See if there's any classes she doesn't like or she just may not like school. I only had a turning point at year 7 because I felt more in control of my own work. There was no real issues and I remember my mum asking why I didn't want to school and kept on and on till I told her I was being bullied (a complete lie) just to get her to leave me alone and then that spiralled out of control.

I would ask her why she feels sad and if there's nothing wrong then leave it and ask in a few days. She may be overwhelmed with school.

jackieb

As you say it's new I would be inclined to think it's possibly a falling out or clash of personalities.

My daughter often used to cry. The teacher's said she'd stand by herself in the playground. Girls would try to talk to her but she was just shy. Even when she went to secondary she still cried (although she's not as bad now). Her guidance teacher did all they could to try and make it easier for her to go to school. She doesn't have to do P.E anymore. She goes to a learning support base for registration. If she's upset in the morning, rather than keep her off school the whole day, they'd rather she goes in a bit later, so I sometimes take her in around 10 or 11am. She can go to the learning base if she has to stay at school at lunchtime (I usually pick her up, but some days I can't). She just needs to tell someone there what she wants from the canteen and they'll get it rather than my daughter having to face the crush that is usually there. My daughter is now 15, and has never walked to or from school. My daughter is about to get tested for Asperger's though. It has taken me this long for someone to do something. My daughter's case is probably nothing like your daughter's. As I said, it's probably something little (but to her seems like the end of the world). Whatever you do though, don't let it drag on. If it carries on pester someone to do something, and don't let it go on for as long as we've had to.

Abbafan1972

Hi, just an update on this.

There's nothing wrong at school, she's not being bullied. She has a few friends in her class and is friendly with a couple of the older girls. One in particular though is known for being a bit on the babyish side and seems to "baby" my dd a lot and makes things worse. This morning, we were just on the cusp of getting it all sorted and getting dd into school without crying and this girl comes up behind me and dd and says "has xxxxx stopped crying now?". So of course this prompts to start crying again and she was quite bad, clinging to me and I had to walk her to the gate, I spoke to the teacher at the gate about what's happening and she was ok about it and took dd in.

This girl isn't liked by a lot of the parents, as she seems to always hang around with the younger ones and says stupid things about dying and stuff like that. Luckily she's in year 6 and is leaving this year, thank god!

There's nothing wrong at home. She's fine at home and ignores me most of the time when I talk to her, lol!

Both DD's get collected from school by my parents on a Thursday and go for tea.

We haven't had any contact with in-laws since October last year. Got tired of jumping through hoops for MIL and she won't visit the kids here (they live half a mile away). I've decided we're better off without them, as they're a complete waste of space.

Spongbong

When I was that age I went through a very similar thing; I would cry every morning and cling to my mum. School itself was fine but what triggered it all off for me was my mum seeing the doctor about her heart (which was fine) and I got it in my head she was going to die. I was terrified to leave her because I thought she'd be dead when I got home.

Have you had any health problems that might be playing on her mind, no matter how insignificant it may seem to you? Children have a habit of blowing things out of proportion big time!

peachyprice

Abbafan1972 wrote: »

We haven't had any contact with in-laws since October last year. Got tired of jumping through hoops for MIL and she won't visit the kids here (they live half a mile away). I've decided we're better off without them, as they're a complete waste of space.

Are you sure this ^^ hasn't had an effect on her?

Children never see relationships with family members in the same way adults do, all she know is nan and grandad have gone.

No matter how badly the MIL has behaved this is her dad's mum & dad, and they're no longer in his life. Perhaps it's made her think that grown ups can so easily stop loving one another and she's afraid that you will do that to her.

elff

My DD (5) hides her school shoes if she is having an 'i am not going to school day':D

I have sent her before in a pair of wellies/slippers/trainers etc... then spent a hour looking for them to drop off when we get back ( they were under the pillow of her made bed

They now get put on a high shelf by the door straight after school.... unless hubby forgets. . . .