Could claim benefits...but choose not to! Why?

GobbledyGook

Also I strongly believe the increase in childcare is interlinked with the increase in houseprices. Years ago 1 wage could cover a mortgage so 1 parent worked and 1 stayed at home or maybe 1 worked full-time and 1 worked part-time when children were in school.

Now you need 2 full-time jobs to cover mortgage or rent so children need to be in childcare full-time leading to more demand and higher prices.

There's probably also a case to say that the increase in single-parent families have had an impact too. More 1 parent families who need to work so need more childcare therefore leading to more demand and higher prices.

I don't think it's anywhere near as simple as to say "well people used to manage so people will just have to now".

lizzybear_2

melly1980 wrote: »

I didnt ask if Daddy was ok with it or what daddys opinions are. I asked what your opinion would be if youve put everything into your career, earned great wages but seen others using the tax you pay for what you can call luxury items / spend.

Wow, rude much?! I've never mentioned what I spent my money on, simply that I lived on a budget and saved which many people do. You have no idea if I have a car, go on holiday, have a big TV or whatever. I work full-time and claim what i'm entitled to. Just because someone is on a low income doesn't mean they don't work as hard. FYI I doubt I would care: If I was on a higher income then I can't see why I would concern myself with what others spend tax credit money on, it's small fry compared to the total amount of tax paid. I'm not quite sure why you're attacking me.

allen35

A bit upset that she doesn't receive as much as others....

If you are entitled CLAIM, if not good luck and enjoy....

looby75

AimeesMum wrote: »

He is looking for a job at the moment but if I was to take my kids out of nursery I would struggle to get them back in as it takes time to wait for places for a 3yr old and a 5 month old,

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

But why can't he look after the children long term? Surely that would save everybody money?

the answer is there for you in bold Older, its a very common problem in places where there aren't and abunance of childcare places.

I've mentioned before about my daughters boyfriends dad, he was out of work for just under a year. He has a daugher who has been in the same nursery since she was 6 months old (her "name" was put down before she was even born that's how long the waiting lists can be here :eek:)she's 7 now but they didn't dare stop sending her or even cut down the hours because they knew that when he got back into work there was no way the place would still be there or that there would be an alternative available. It caused them massive problems as dd bf's Step mum earned just above the amount that meant her husband couldn't get income based JSA so after 6 months they got no help at all.

Thankfully he is now back in a really good job and they are starting to get on top of things, if they hadn't struggled and kept thier daughter in childcare it might not have been possible for them both to work and that was never going to be a long term solution, one income often isn't enough these days.

AimeesMum_2

Thanks Looby. My son has been on the waiting list for the nursery since he was a week old. We had to wait until some of the older kids moved up to the next room. I don't want to get in a vicious circle of him never working again. He did look after my daughter for some time before our son was born and I had a very nice neighbour who took her on days where he couldn't because he was at the psychiatrist or unable to get out of bed. I did actually try and find a flexible childminder but they all wanted paid full time as my son and daughter would have been taking up a place that they could have filled with someone who was paying. Unfortunately, we had to move away so they need to stay in the nursery now and hopefully he will be off the IB soon as he is feeling much better and his doctor feels like the only way for him to get fully back to normal is to get out of the house and have a purpose to his life again.

Oldernotwiser

looby75 wrote: »

the answer is there for you in bold Older, its a very common problem in places where there aren't and abunance of childcare places.

I had read that but it only applies of they're going to need to go back into childcare before very long. This was why I asked whether the husband could look after the children long termie. until the youngest starts school.

Oldernotwiser

AimeesMum wrote: »

his doctor feels like the only way for him to get fully back to normal is to get out of the house and have a purpose to his life again.

Most people would find looking after their own children pretty purposeful, if perhaps more hard work than he's used to!

dibblersan

I think it's a case of you'd be amazed what you can do if you have to.

I personally don't want to become incapable at any point - I know far to many people who have slipped into easy habits of becoming dependant because it makes them more comfortable and now are incable of functioning without that support.

When I was growing up my mother was a young widow come over from ireland to be a nurse. she managed to raise me with the help of elderly neighbours and in return did their washing. she didn't recieve any benifits and was on a student nurse salary of pennies (or d to be more accurate) and yes, we didn't see her as much as we would have liked growing up, but the idea of giving up work because it's to hard or it's easier not to is an alien and somewhat repulsive idea to me.

you chose to have children. you (i assume) love and cherish your children. i cannot see why if someone won't pay you to pay someone else to look after them you wouldn't WORK as hard as you can to do it yourself.

even the idea of working part time and your husband caring for them part time as he is able would make more sense to me

that being said, it's your life and your choices. i just don't understand them.

looby75

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

I had read that but it only applies of they're going to need to go back into childcare before very long. This was why I asked whether the husband could look after the children long termie. until the youngest starts school.

but not every family can manage long term on just one wage long term.

It's a sad fact of modern day life, especially if you have a mortgage.

looby75

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

Most people would find looking after their own children pretty purposeful, if perhaps more hard work than he's used to!

it would be enough to send a lot of people stir crazy too!

I adore my children and loved being a SAHM when they were very little but by the time they were nursery school age I NEEDED to go to work, and not just to help the finances.

It's not about it being hard work for most parents who go back to work, it's about needing a life outside family, especially if there are mental health problems too.