Question for parents living in flats!

chocdonuty

Sounds like the exact same set up as my flat! I'm on the top floor and below me has a little boy but thankfully apart from a bit of running about and for some reason she always slams the windows shut, all seems ok. I never speak to her but I hope she never moves All you can do is speak to either the parents or the housing officer if it is all housing association, the more complaints they have then the more will be done hopefully. Also if it's the same set up as here she may well be waking the neighbours to the side too.
As for the riding the bikes round the car park, my daughter and her friends do that too, basically there isn't much to do round here, too young to go to the park by themselves and I doubt the parents would like to go all day everyday in the holidays!! Hopefully the parents are watching from inside to keep an eye on the kids(although from some behaviour from some of the kids round here i doubt it!)

Spendless

jtr2803 wrote: »

On a seperate issue, we also have issues with the majority of residents (I hate to say it but they are all Housing Association tenants) on the other side of our block, they also allow the children to ride round on bikes which ended up with one riding into my Oh's brand new work van about 3 weeks ago. It seems no one round here is able to take any responsibility where children are concerned!

They allow the children to ride their bikes where?

Is it just that you don't have kids and had strict rules as a child yourself that you can't see another pov?. eg I don't think a 8/9 yo would know what on earth you're getting at if you open the door and say it's 9.15 to them, which probably accounts for the 'yeah' answer.

emsywoo123

jtr2803 wrote: »

I do appreciate to some that 9.15am is a lie in and I know it might be selfish but to me, sorry, on a Sunday it isn't.

But I think, generally, you are going to have to accept to most people (and in particular parents!) it IS a lie in

I agree with alot of what you are saying, but if a neighbour came to me and said "your DD has woken me up at 9.15 grrr" I have to admit I wouldn't take it terribly seriously......

jtr2803

chocdonuty wrote: »

Sounds like the exact same set up as my flat! I'm on the top floor and below me has a little boy but thankfully apart from a bit of running about and for some reason she always slams the windows shut, all seems ok. I never speak to her but I hope she never moves All you can do is speak to either the parents or the housing officer if it is all housing association, the more complaints they have then the more will be done hopefully. Also if it's the same set up as here she may well be waking the neighbours to the side too.
As for the riding the bikes round the car park, my daughter and her friends do that too, basically there isn't much to do round here, too young to go to the park by themselves and I doubt the parents would like to go all day everyday in the holidays!! Hopefully the parents are watching from inside to keep an eye on the kids(although from some behaviour from some of the kids round here i doubt it!)

Generally, the only time I see the mother is when she is standing at the front door shouting to her child because she can't see her! The bike she rides is also WAY too big for her, she can barely touch the floor which isn't great at all. She has absolutely no comprehension that it is a car park first and foremost, twice I have gone to pull out of a space and she has just ridden straight in front of me, if I hadn't seen her then I would have knocked her straight off her bike.

The scratch on OH's new van didn't go down very well either, it's a company van and he has to report weekly on the bodywork. Needless to say he got the flack for it.

Spendless wrote: »

They allow the children to ride their bikes where?

Is it just that you don't have kids and had strict rules as a child yourself that you can't see another pov?. eg I don't think a 8/9 yo would know what on earth you're getting at if you open the door and say it's 9.15 to them, which probably accounts for the 'yeah' answer.

You are wrong on both counts I am afraid, I do have a daughter who is 11 this summer, she does not live here full time but when she is here she does not go outside and play on other people's landings and no she doesn't wake us up at 9.15am either! I said in my opening post I appreciate it can be hard to entertain children in a flat - I know that it is so I don't think you could say I don't see other people's point of view, I do to an extent. My mum was very lenient with us as children and we were always out to play, riding bikes in the park but we were also taught to be respectful of our noise levels in the mornings and evenings.

emsywoo123 wrote: »

But I think, generally, you are going to have to accept to most people (and in particular parents!) it IS a lie in

I agree with alot of what you are saying, but if a neighbour came to me and said "your DD has woken me up at 9.15 grrr" I have to admit I wouldn't take it terribly seriously......

Really? See if someone came to me and said your daughter was sitting on my doorstep shouting I would be quite horrified that a) she was shouting on your doorstep which is not where she lives and that b) she had woken you up. Just because I happen to be up I wouldn't assume that you are. I'm not trying to be argumentative but I am genuinely quite surprised at this. I think this incident was really just the icing on the cake for the night time noise, the crap left on the stairs etc.

Neighbours eh!!

andrealm

It's reasonable for children to be and about playing at 9.15, and to be out on their bikes but I agree that some of the other things sound annoying, like leaving marbles about. If she does have add or something, it may be hard for her to get to sleep and stay asleep, hence the tantrums at night, this might be a hard one to resolve, but maybe the parents could do with keeping a better eye on her during the day. If she is outside your flat shouting, do they never come out and say anything to her?

Spendless

jtr2803 wrote: »

You are wrong on both counts I am afraid, I do have a daughter who is 11 this summer, she does not live here full time but when she is here she does not go outside and play on other people's landings and no she doesn't wake us up at 9.15am either! I said in my opening post I appreciate it can be hard to entertain children in a flat - I know that it is so I don't think you could say I don't see other people's point of view, I do to an extent. My mum was very lenient with us as children and we were always out to play, riding bikes in the park but we were also taught to be respectful of our noise levels in the mornings and evenings.

To be fair there's a difference between an 8yo who is more likely to be playing a lot closer and up earlier than an 11yo who is getting the teenage sleep hormones kicking in, more likely to be on a plug in machine and more likely to be allowed further away when they do get up. I have 1 of each, and jsut because your DD doesn't do it, (at your place) doesn't mean every child is the same. Perhaps you have one of those rare quiet ones. Plenty of people other than me have pointed out that 9.15 isn't 'too early' from the kids pov.

And where are the kids riding the bikes that you are unhappy about?

Savvy_Sue

It sounds as if the children are riding bikes around the car park. If they are HA tenants, then phone the HA and ask to speak to the Housing Officer for that property. They can try to get the message across ...

xangeleyes

I understand how you feel about not wanting to talk to the parents, because some parents can become a bit defensive etc.
However, I'm worried about the safety of others if she is leaving things like marbles on the stairs etc.
I think you should have a quiet word about it.
You could go and speak to your council area manager, this would make it hard for the neighbour to find out who has complained (very good if this neighbour can be a bit nasty). They will have a word with the parents and hopefully you can see some improvement.

The bike thing outside, again, I think you could have a word with the mother and explain that she could have been hit by a car.

At least school is starting soon

One other thing, you say that this child wakes up screaming at 1-2am, do you know if this child suffers from anything?

My daughter is 7 years old, and since she was 2 years old, she would wake up in the night screaming because of leg and/or arm pains. Growing pains seems to be the explanation of it all, however it can happen everyday for weeks on end, or sometimes only 1 a fortnight.....very strange. It put me and my husband in a bit of a worry because of our neighbours as we are in a terraced house but it's so thin that I can hear them switching on their lights lol.
Good Luck.

jtr2803

andrealm wrote: »

It's reasonable for children to be and about playing at 9.15, and to be out on their bikes but I agree that some of the other things sound annoying, like leaving marbles about. If she does have add or something, it may be hard for her to get to sleep and stay asleep, hence the tantrums at night, this might be a hard one to resolve, but maybe the parents could do with keeping a better eye on her during the day. If she is outside your flat shouting, do they never come out and say anything to her?

I agree that children are entitled to be up and playing at 9.15am totally, it's the fact that is was right outside my door that gets me! I have no idea where they were this morning when this was going on, they must have been able to hear it in their flat as well, they must assume it is ok?

Spendless wrote: »

To be fair there's a difference between an 8yo who is more likely to be playing a lot closer and up earlier than an 11yo who is getting the teenage sleep hormones kicking in, more likely to be on a plug in machine and more likely to be allowed further away when they do get up. I have 1 of each, and jsut because your DD doesn't do it, (at your place) doesn't mean every child is the same. Perhaps you have one of those rare quiet ones. Plenty of people other than me have pointed out that 9.15 isn't 'too early' from the kids pov.

And where are the kids riding the bikes that you are unhappy about?

Yes I concur that the age does make some difference and although it might not seem it I do know children need to play! My daughter is very self sufficient and I admit that she is very well behaved but I can honestly say, hand on heart, that regardless of where we lived, at 8/9 years old she would not be letting herself in/out of the property and making a racket in communal areas, especially not ones that we do not use.

Sorry, the bike riding, I thought I'd already mentioned but it's in the communal car park which serves the four buildings on the development and there is, at any one time, in excess of 40 cars parked there. The bike riding does worry me as I don't want to hit a child and I also don't want my car being scratched and crashed into! I already have a large scratch down the rear panel of my car which looks like it could have been handle bars but I don't know for sure so I can't point fingers.

I don't want to sound like an old fogey, honestly I'm not and I have nothing against children!

emsywoo123

jtr2803 wrote: »

Really? See if someone came to me and said your daughter was sitting on my doorstep shouting I would be quite horrified that a) she was shouting on your doorstep which is not where she lives and that b) she had woken you up. Just because I happen to be up I wouldn't assume that you are. I'm not trying to be argumentative but I am genuinely quite surprised at this. I think this incident was really just the icing on the cake for the night time noise, the crap left on the stairs etc.

Neighbours eh!!

My point, if you read my post accurately, was that 9.15 is not an unreasonable time for a child to be playing. Yes, on your doorstep is wrong, but no, 9.15 is not!