Harrassment at Gym

Equaliser123

fuzzybear01 wrote: »

If you are being harrassed then I would suggest reporting it to the police. The company would also be more likely to take you seriously.

You have a very high expectation as to what the Police can and would do.

Equaliser123

pmduk wrote: »

"Just look at the texts I received from the personal trainer at the gym" The texts exist, see them try and wriggle out of that. Remember Truth is an absolute defence against slander/libel.

They will say that the employee was on a frolic of his own and does not represent the company in his actions.

halibut2209

Also the texts alone may not prove harrassment (of course we don't know the content). He may say it was consensual

Sambucus_Nigra

Either get your butt to the gym and see the manager and put an official complaint in and get your gym membership retracted and the payments back....or get straight to the rozzers with your evidence.

Depends on whether you are more interested in protecting other people from this sleaze or getting your cash back.

You decide.

DVardysShadow

Equaliser123 wrote: »

You have a very high expectation as to what the Police can and would do.

I agree. What has happened here is unacceptable behaviour - and breach of trust - of a kind where quite clearly OP cannot be expected to continue to pay for membership while the trainer remains in the employ of the gym.

But as a crime, adult to adult with no vulnerable persons angle, it is fairly marginal.

Equaliser123

DVardysShadow wrote: »

But as a crime, adult to adult with no vulnerable persons angle, it is fairly marginal.

Yes I think so too.

To be frank, I can't see any crime having been committed - other than, perhaps, a breach of the DPA which the Police would not be interested in. Although all the gym will have to show is that they took reasonable steps to safeguard the data.

RuthnJasper

Taking the OP at her word, what I would do is to write a formal letter of complaint to the Gym manager, listing accurately all the texts, the dates and times they were received. Include in the letter something along the lines of "I expect to receive a full reply from you within 14 days, along with any mitigating action that you propose to take. If I do not receive a satisfactory response from you then I will have no option but to take the matter further." Something like that. However, you do need to be sure that you are not mis-hearing or mis-applying a bit of general flirty banter for the sole purpose of getting out of a contract. I am NOT accusing you of doing this - but false allegations against staff (particularly male) can genuinely wreck lives.

One has to accept that, when in a gym and asking for instruction from a member of staff, the trainer may, out of necessity, have to put his hand on one's waist. However, unpleasant remarks about other gym users (racist or otherwise), unwanted sexual comments or touching and - most especially - the texts are something that no-one (male or female) should have to put up with.

I have been a member of the local gym for years now. I often indulge in general friendly cheeky banter with the (mostly male) staff there and give as good as I get - BUT not a single one of them would ever do anything as unprofessional as touching a client inappropriately, making racist or sexist jibes, commenting in any derogative way about other gym members, or sending dirty texts - and I wouldn't ever consider doing the same to any of them.

If this chap is genuinely being inappropriate then it's important that he is stopped. If he gets away with it (and bear in mind that he may not be only doing it with you, OP) then he may feel that it is acceptable for him to behave like this and will, quite possibly, go too far with another woman. I tend to go the the gym quite late and so, at closing time, there's often just me and one of the instructors - I feel perfectly safe when I'm there. However, I would hate myself if I had been subject to this behaviour, let it rest because it was too much hassle to convince the management, and then found out that the instructor had gone on to actually assault someone. I would NOT want to be the only young lady in the gym with a grubby pervert trying to put himself between me and the door...

Good luck with your situation.

Gavin83

How regularly have you used the gym since you joined?

magentalady

DVardysShadow wrote: »

But as a crime, adult to adult with no vulnerable persons angle, it is fairly marginal.

Yes, I think I agree with you, but it does to some extent depend on what the OP means by 'inappropriate texts'. That really could cover a multitude of sins.

He could have texted her for supposedly 'legitimate' reasons (e.g. 'I have to cancel your training session tomorrow') but worded them rather inappropriately (e.g. starting them with 'hey sexy' or similar). Which, in my opinion, would be inappropriate and repulsive, but probably ultimately harmless. That is my opinion though, and everyone will have a different opinion of where the line should be drawn in these situations.

At the other end of the scale, we could be talking about him repeatedly sending her sexually explicit texts, despite her asking him to stop, and
making her feel intimated and threatened as a result. It doesn't sound like that's the case since the OP doesn't put that much emphasis on the texts in her first post, but I don't think you can immediately rule that out. Harrassment is a crime and it can be truly devastating, so you can't just dismiss it without further information about the context.

DVardysShadow

magentalady wrote: »

...
At the other end of the scale, we could be talking about him repeatedly sending her sexually explicit texts, despite her asking him to stop, and
making her feel intimated and threatened as a result. It doesn't sound like that's the case since the OP doesn't put that much emphasis on the texts in her first post, but I don't think you can immediately rule that out. Harrassment is a crime and it can be truly devastating, so you can't just dismiss it without further information about the context.

It is a fair point.

What has bothered me about this thread is the number of people who have said take it to the police on what is quite a balanced account of unreasonable behaviour There is no evidence here of any significant degree of violation and I think that the correct response is to firmly tell the trainer to stop and escalate to management. That should put sufficient distance between OP and trainer.