My home is a mess

sonastin

(((hugs))) Buffy - sorry to hear you're down again. don't let the split from the man spill over to spoiling other things in your life. As Emms said, use it positively to treat yourself to a nice tidy room - just for you and just because you can!


I had a couple of small victories over the weekend. We were out Sunday morning and OH was talking about needed to get home because the living room needed a clean. There was a hint of reprove in his tone until I pointed out that it was his job. I reminded him that he said I had to clean the bathroom because he cleaned the living room - a task he hasn't done since despite the bathroom having been done a good few times since - and as I got the raw end of that deal, I wasn't about to take on his jobs too. It pretty much stopped him in his tracks and when we got home he got on with giving the living room a thoroughly good spring clean, moving furniture and everything. Given we only put the furniture in there in Feb, its amazing how huge the dust buffaloes behind the sofa had grown. I think perhaps I didn't get raw end of that deal after all!

We also purchased a damaged (chipped cistern) toilet from Wickes for a ridiculously low price yesterday afternoon. When OH built the garage, he put in drains so that he could plumb in a toilet and also piped hot & cold water across there. So now he's got a couple of parts to buy and then he'll have himself a fully functioning toilet in his workshop. I've already told him that from that point on, he's not allowed to do anything in my bathroom to make it smell - he's got his own space for that! I realise its probably wishful thinking but a girl can dream.

Buffy - that's one of those positives you can focus on just now that Hollywood rom-coms never let on. Boys smell!

Emm-in-a-pickle

Hi Messies!
Buffy - still thinking +ve vibes for you. Sonastin has a very good point there too!
Mind you, my old Daftie-dog beats the menfolk lately since I`ve added half a tin of pilchards to her daily diet - stinky both ends, but otherwise seems healthier!!!

Sonastin, if you managed to get OH to thoroughly clean the living room I wouldn`t call it a SMALL victory at all! Well done you!

Today I`ve made a start (again!) on my oft-postponed mission to use stuff out of freezers.
1)Wholegrain mustard mash leftovers & some puff pastry - just adding some cheese and a bit of chopped onion, make pasties while cooking lamb for tomorrow.
- DS will eat pasties rather than a `proper` meal!
2)Also cooking some thawed chicken thighs, & thawing some rice noodles for a green Thai effort tonight, I have to use up some fresh coriander!
That`s four items taken out of freezer. Long way to go.....

I`ve also dealt with the build-up of real mail, lists, junk mail, paper carp beside computer. The little table there seems to attract paper very fast. The pile was about 4 inches high. Gone now, just kept a few bits of scrap paper for more lists...

I`ve also spent an hour in DGD`s room, found a bit more carpet, 2 pairs of `missing` trousers, a stash of odd socks, and various other clothes for WM. I`ve had a coat-hanger cull too, those that are too small for her clothes to stay on (not that she goes for the `hang clothes on hangers` option anyway!)

Emm-in-a-pickle

Hi Messies!
Here`s ANOTHER weekend coming up. Weeks seem to me to be flying by lately - hope that`s the case for schoolworkers too, and others who have holidays coming up soon. Lots of folks seem to be MIA lately, but the whole forum seems quieter at the moment as well. Hardly surprising as there`s so much more outside activity as well as indoors stuff to try to keep up with.
I hope everyone`s well & doing ok.

My last few days have been busy in a `bitty` sort of way, doesn`t sound much but it all takes a slice out of a day.
I got my new specs (MrT, only took a week)
Took OH for his eye test, & had a wander round town (CS`s & poundshop!)
Bought 4 little pots of YS chives at Mr T & `rescued` them - now thriving well in a big spare planter outside. WHY do `rescue` herbs seem to do better than the pricey garden centre pots? I rescued an oregano plant the other week and that` doing really well too.
Freezer use-up mission going slowly - used a bag of frozen peas yesterday. Little pockets of space showing now...
Also, I`ve had another little binge in DGD`s room. Baby steps in there is the only way, unless I hire a bull-dozer & a skip! We may get more done in there when she`s here over the weekend!
Today, fridge tetris was necessitated by a trip to farmshop, Watermelons do take up a fair bit of space....

bearcub

Evening Messies. First of all, Buffy, huge HUGS to you. You've had some good words from others, and you can share anything (maybe that should be almost anything!) with the Messies! It'll take a while, though, to get over it.

Emms, I gather you've not returned to work yet, but you're obviously very busy! Well done to your DGD for her school report. You must be very proud of her. :T

Sonastin, I suspect there's many a woman who's wished that their man had a separate loo. What a great idea! :rotfl:

Yes, guilty again, of going AWOL. Not sure where the time goes, although we've been looking after my friend's 4 ponies while she and her OH are away. That's of course, as well as seeing to ours. Somehow, though, you always put in more effort to look after someone else's. Have had a number of meetings to attend, with associated minutes/notes to type up, a newsletter to compile, and GARDENING to do. :j I quite enjoy admin, which is rather odd for a scientist I always feel, but the garden will always win. Last week, I took a number of bags into a local CS that had had a fire a couple of months before. So, Mum and I did our best to re-stock the shop , with several bags of jigsaws from Mum, and clothes, towels, books and CDs from me. I managed to get a lot of house de-messing done last week; in fact, a lot of it in one day. Supercharged bearsome, apparently, which could have been because I went to a Reflection Day on the preceding Saturday, and came away quite refreshed, having had a number of concerns on my mind - nothing personal. This week I've managed to get a lot more done.

The famous Isle of Wight Festival happened last weekend, and I'd got stupidly excited when I saw all the preparations going on, despite the fact that we (DDs and I) weren't going, and didn't go last year, either, because of the increased numbers in 2011. Anyway, felt a bit flat about it all, then DD2 called DD1, saying that there was a mini festival going on in Surrey mid-July with a band (The Squeeze) that DD2 likes, and a singer (James Morrison) who DD1 likes, and would she like to go. DD1 calls me to tell me about James Morrison, who I really like, too and, as a result, we have tickets booked. DD1 has booked accommodation for 2 nights, and she and I are travelling up on the Saturday, going to meet up with DD2 and see her and bf's house, and then, on Sunday, in DD2's words, "Mum and her girls are going to listen to music and get drunk in a field"! Really looking forward to it. :j:j:j Maybe it's time I grew up. No, on second thoughts, don't think I will.:p

Buffythedebtslayer

Hi Messies

Thank you for being so nice about me spilling my guts. I feel better, seem to have got over the feeling sorry for myself phase.

I need some advice.

I love the piggies but they have no life with me and now with my new job I am just going to be busier. Plus the dogs, they make such a fuss over them being anywhere downstairs or in the garden. It is difficult to spend time with them really, the current cage is impractical and takes up so much room.

I really don't want to give them up, so I wondering can anyone come up with a space saving way to house them? or maybe outside?

I have tried every type of cage for them. my latest wheeze is to try a two storey hutch. in my room. I am far from keen on this idea. I have thought about housing them outside. neighbours down the road always have their rabbit eaten if you see what I mean so I know the local foxes are at large looking for dinner.

I do have the option of rehoming them - which is lucky. I have some good friends who will help me. And if I wanted to rent? no animals. and mum is not moving to Florida any more. so.

I just don't know what to do. I think about my room without them and as awful as it sounds it would be nice to have a bedroom and not a barn. Their cage is massive and I can't work at my desk.

I could move the desk downstairs.

too tired. any ideas please?

Buffythedebtslayer

Well I made lists, I slept on it, I made more lists.

I decided in the end that they - as much as I love them would be better off with some one who could spend time with them. I do feed them and keep them clean but I know I haven't the time or the space now. Life was going to be something else but it is going in a different direction now.

thanks again for letting me vent.

xx

Emm-in-a-pickle

Hi Messies!
Bearcub, good to hear from you again. No wonder you`ve been AWOL, Bless you, busy with 4 extra ponies as well as all the other stuff! (And here`s me still struggling to `muck out` just one teenagers bedroom - still a work in progress. You`re right though, I`m SO proud of her, and thankful to have her here so much despite her messy pit!)
How lovely to have the event in July to look forward to - I love the way your DD2 puts it! As for `growing up`, forget it - growing old (disgracefully!) takes enough effort.

Buffy - I`m glad you feel a bit better about recent events. I`ve read and re-read your post. I understand your dilemma with the piggies, but it sounds as if you already have the answer, for your sake as well as the piggies. You are thinking of their welfare, and it`s not as if you haven`t tried everything to keep them safe and happy, but your room sans piggy-hutch may be a much easier space for you to keep as you`d like it, and if they are re-homed where someone has more time and space for them then knowing this would help to ease your missing them.
I`ve had a slightly similar dilemma myself.
I can`t remember a time when I didn`t sleep with a dog (or 2) in the bedroom.
My old Daftie-dog has needed help up the stairs since last year, and I`m the only one who she`ll have do this. (Sort of supporting her back end at her pace, not actually carrying her.) When I went into hospital in April she stayed downstairs. When I came home me helping her upstairs was out of the question, and she`s got used to the idea. Recently I felt I could easily manage the task again, but being at home all day I`m seeing more frequently that her back legs are really weaker and wobbly some days, even on the flat. I`ve thought about things, and know there`ll probably soon come a time when she couldn`t do the stairs thing even with help, so then there`d be the wrench of her getting used to staying downstairs all over again. Which would be unkind.
I do really miss her coming upstairs more than she misses me! But there`s no doubt at all that the landing and bedroom floors are a lot less manky! And there`s only one set of dog-bed stuff to launder. (I know it`s not the same thing at all, as I still have her downstairs.) I`d give some serious thought to the re-homing option for your piggies, as it sounds like you already have done, and bear in mind that if they go to good friends you will probably miss them more than they`ll miss you. But you`ll know they are cared for properly, and not at risk of being a fox`s dinner!

Emm-in-a-pickle

Buffy - there I was typing away when you posted. I think you`d already decided well.
As for venting, just go ahead any time you need to!

bearcub

Evening Messies.

Buffy, as Emms says, it sounds as if you've made the decision about the piggies. As long as you know they'll go to a good home, you'll feel at ease. And who knows? Maybe you'll have the chance in the future, and the space, to give some others a home.

Emms, such a shame about Dafty Dog in a way but, if she's happy, then that's got to be a good thing, hasn't it? I'm really happy not to have a young person's 'pit' to clean/clear anymore. DD1 used to have the bigger room in the family home, and she made sure she filled it, whereas DD2 had a tiny room, and learned to keep everything tidy. DD1's flat is just as bad as her bedroom was (though, oddly enough, her bedroom in the flat is the only tidy room!). I've yet to see DD2's house, of course, but I get the impression that she keeps the house pretty tidy or, at least, as tidy as her bf allows it to be! I'm quite amazed at just how 'domesticated' she's turned out to be, as it was her sister who took an interest in cooking when they were still at home. You just can't tell.

Haven't don't any de-messing today, except put away some dried washing, but I have coloured my hair. Too gusty a day to do any gardening today! Still, next week is forecast to be pretty good, which is great as I'm spending the day with DD1 on Wednesday, her birthday.

Emm-in-a-pickle

Hi Messies!
Bearcub, you`re right - you never can tell how kids will turn out! I never thought my DD would grow up into a good cook & organise her house (& 5 kids!!) so well as she does. When she was in her teens....there was a John Cooper Clark song `Valley of the lost women` with the line "she left her room in a mess" that was her sig. She was always losing stuff, leaving clothes/shoes etc at friends` houses when she stayed over.
DGD`s room is STILL a work in progress, though she`s spent a fair bit of time on it, sorted loads of paper (she draws a lot) and I`ve given her a sturdy metal filing tray - 4 tier - to try to keep it all in better order, rather than all over everywhere and under her bed!!!! I tried the "blitz it in a day, bin it all!" approach with her dad, and with DD, and it was a very fraught and shouty performance, any tidiness was very short-lived and rooms were in a mess again almost before peace was made! I`m now trying the more calm and persistent tack with DGD as she is really too sweet to get cross with!

I`m still off work - probably going back early August, as per doctors` advice. I`m feeling well, able to do loads of stuff but carefully, and still not lifting heavy stuff etc.
Might get at least DGD `trained` to keep her pit tidy if we get it right slowly before I resume work again.