desperatly need help with funding dads funeral!!!

-BA-

If you haven't yet been to the Births, Marriages and Deaths (Register) office then I would try and go asap. You are going to need the necessary certificates anyway and get copies if there are insurance/pension companies to inform.

The register office we used had a bereavement pack that had a lot of information on what to do next.

rodeo

I know 100% there is no estate to claim against whatsoever my only concern really now is that hes buried/cremated in some way if the local authority is the only way to do it then so be it should i contact the hospital and tell them I cant sort a funeral out or shall I wait for them to contact me?

rodeo

I have been and got the death certificate the hospital where he passed away has its own registery place there are no insurances or pensions at all theres nothing due to him financially from any source so its not even a matter of borrowing some money untill it can be repaid i was also given the pack/forms for the dss funeral fund whilst i was there but they wont pay anything out untill after the funeral as i said in original post and even then it doesnt come anywere near the total amount for even the most basic funeral

-BA-

rodeo wrote: »

I have been and got the death certificate the hospital where he passed away has its own registery place there are no insurances or pensions at all theres nothing due to him financially from any source so its not even a matter of borrowing some money untill it can be repaid i was also given the pack/forms for the dss funeral fund whilst i was there but they wont pay anything out untill after the funeral as i said in original post and even then it doesnt come anywere near the total amount for even the most basic funeral

I realise this is a very stressful time, it absolutely battered me and my mum trying to get it all sorted when all we wanted was to tell the world to go to hell but you really need to take a step back, then a deep breath and start afresh.

Firstly, not every funeral director demands payment or deposit upfront. See if there is a family run independant one close to you. Call them, invite them for coffee and explain your circumstances. Of course now is not the best time to be negotiating but to them this is a business and you need to understand that.

Our funeral directors fully understood our predicament and worked with us every step of the way. They didn't ask for a deposit and we kept them updated with every development. We only got the final contribution from the hospitality industry about 6 weeks ago.

rodeo

Well I got the expected phone call this morning from the hospital,asking me what my arrangements were for my dads funeral. I explained the situation that I had already told them when I picked up the death certificate, that I had no money to cremate him and he had left none and all funeral directors needed a deposit, and she gave me the number of an independant one which I rang and although the man was extremely helpful, after I explained my situation, it was still the same, minimum £2200 for a funeral with around £600 deposit ,I did ask her what happens when the deceased as no relatives and she said the hospital trust burys them but that wouldnt apply to my dad as he as me,(have to say her tone of voice changed considerably when replying to this question) and then she said he obviously cant stay there indefinatley, which unless Im completley stupid Im well aware of, but not sure what she expects me to do exactly. I cant be the only one in this situation there are so many people on benefits at moment Im sure they must have come across this situation before, I feel like Im banging my head against a wall no one seems to get it and as I cant perform a miracle Iv no clue what Im supposed to do

anguk

I'm so sorry you're going through all this. We had something similarish happen when my brother-in-law died, he had no family other than my husband, no savings, assets or insurance. At the time the only income we had was my husband's incapacity benefit topped up with income support so we thought we would be eligible to get help with funeral costs. We explained this to the funeral director who thankfully didn't ask for a deposit and said we could settle up once we'd received the funeral payment.

We filled the forms in and sent them off then a few weeks later got a reply saying we wouldn't be entitled to any funeral payment because apparently my BIL had been awarded DLA and incapacity benefit and received quite a large back-payment shortly before he died! We were unaware of this and goodness knows what he did with the money because there was nothing to show for it! Bank statements showed that he had received the money but had spent it all in the weeks before he died but that didn't help us!

Long story short, we ended up liable for the full costs of the funeral (over £2,000, he was a very big man so had to have a special coffin and had to go to a crematorium in a different county) with no help from anywhere. Luckily for us the funeral director was very understanding and allowed us to come up with a payment plan to pay it off. We sold as much of my BILs things as we could (computer, household items etc) and gave that money to the funeral director but it still took us quite a while to pay it all off.

Since then I've made sure I've got adequate insurance because there's no way I want my loved ones to be liable for my funeral costs and I wouldn't want them to go through what we did.

-BA-

Rodeo have you contacted SSAFA yet? Not wishing to see anyone saddled with deabt, but have you approached your bank for support?

rodeo

Well just to update and also for the people who may be as unfortunate as to be in the same situation in the future, the lady from patient services at the hospital rang me back, and gave me the option of the hospital cremating my dad due to the circumstances. So this is the option I have taken, not ideal but it does show that it is an option ,as mentioned earlier in this thread. I get the ashes at least, I may even get a bill at the end of it but I do know I dont have to pay it and at least this awful situation is sorted now.
Thanks everyone for your suggestions.