Neighbour dispute - disclose at sale?

SuzieSue

Dontknow wrote: »

Good points. When I originally called the police (to shed light on the situation..is he in the wrong, etc) that police officer said that yes, once you get us involved it only gets worse - not better. Great! So we're keeping this in mind.

Their family dynamics are that the dad is not the bully (believe it or not!) but the mom is. The son is an only child, conceived via ivf, we had the whole blow by blow when we moved here about it all, their debt because of it, etc. They offloaded loads on us & we just weren't interested...she's very "hard done by" in her mind & is the type to use a sledgehammer to crack a walnut - hence this situation. Their son can do no wrong in their mind so very spoilt.

I'm not worried about any unsavoury friends. Infact, they have no friends! I've been here over 12 years now & lived next to them for about 9 years..but yes I do worry about what all of this is doing to my children..they saw me crying when the CSO was here..not good.

I want to keep the peace while we live here - keep my children safe but also feel empowered & not like a prisoner in my home & I'm not sure how I can achieve this..

I'm not sure how you can say that the father isn't a bully when he was clearly aggressive towards you for no reason.

But anyway, the only way you can resolve the situation is by getting back to being on good terms with them. Someone has to back down and it has to be you for your and your children's peace of mind. If the situation has made you cry, surely you must see that you need to do something. I have never cried because of a neighbour and I am in my mid-forties.

I personally would go round with a box of chocolates or a bottle of wine to make the peace. They have been totally at fault (but your children shouldn't have stared at their son even if he was staring at them as you don't know what psychological problems he has).

harrup

Dontknow wrote: »

Completely agree - Bitter!



So essentially I'd already have to disclose this dispute..and the fact they called the police on me which amounted to nothing & there is no report of it? Hardly seems fair..
/QUOTE]


I totally agree. And sympathize. It kind of reminds me of the old eBay system where crappy sellers held dissatisfied buyers to ransom via the threat of retaliatory negative feedback! Luckily eBay changed the system.

But I think you misunderstood. Or perhaps I misunderstood? Your neighbour involved the police...but you didn't, the whole thing came to nothing but now you are thinking of filing a formal complaint?

All I was saying was - if you do so ....and you may have beyond valid reasons for doing so - you then have to truthfully declare this "dispute" or action when asked.

Whether this is wise in view that you are thinking of selling your home in the near future....hmmm.

I had a quick google under "declaring dispute with neighbour" and found the following:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/money/2002/nov/17/movinghouse.property1

http://www.walesonline.co.uk/news/wales-news/2007/12/31/price-fear-deters-neighbour-disputes-91466-20299469/

http://www.fool.co.uk/news/comment/2006/c060512b.htm

to just list a few.

The consensus seems to be that withholding the truth about neighbourly spats may have costly repercussions.

Dontknow_2

SuzieSue wrote: »

I'm not sure how you can say that the father isn't a bully when he was clearly aggressive towards you for no reason.

But anyway, the only way you can resolve the situation is by getting back to being on good terms with them. Someone has to back down and it has to be you for your and your children's peace of mind. If the situation has made you cry, surely you must see that you need to do something. I have never cried because of a neighbour and I am in my mid-forties.

I personally would go round with a box of chocolates or a bottle of wine to make the peace. They have been totally at fault (but your children shouldn't have stared at their son even if he was staring at them as you don't know what psychological problems he has).

Hmmm well the father is a bully but with their family dynamics - the wife TOTALLY rules the roost. He is utterly powerless. She called the police, not him. He's not the brightest person - but she's very manipulative, domineering & verbally abusive to the husband.

I know there needs to be some peace but hell will have to freeze before you catch me going over there with ANYTHING! Seriously they'll think we can all be friends again & while we're at it, why don't we just take down the wall that divides our housese & all live together!

Their kid is just a brat. Period.

We have decided to act as if they don't exist - carry on as normal - the kids will play outside when they like. If the kid starts talking to them, they'll ignore him, if he comes to our house, they'll tell me. If things kick off again, I'm calling the police..

satchmeister

harrup wrote: »

Dontknow wrote: »

Completely agree - Bitter!



So essentially I'd already have to disclose this dispute..and the fact they called the police on me which amounted to nothing & there is no report of it? Hardly seems fair..
/QUOTE]


I totally agree. And sympathize. It kind of reminds me of the old eBay system where crappy sellers held dissatisfied buyers to ransom via the threat of retaliatory negative feedback! Luckily eBay changed the system.

But I think you misunderstood. Or perhaps I misunderstood? Your neighbour involved the police...but you didn't, the whole thing came to nothing but now you are thinking of filing a formal complaint?

All I was saying was - if you do so ....and you may have beyond valid reasons for doing so - you then have to truthfully declare this "dispute" or action when asked.

Whether this is wise in view that you are thinking of selling your home in the near future....hmmm.

I had a quick google under "declaring dispute with neighbour" and found the following:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/money/2002/nov/17/movinghouse.property1

http://www.walesonline.co.uk/news/wales-news/2007/12/31/price-fear-deters-neighbour-disputes-91466-20299469/

http://www.fool.co.uk/news/comment/2006/c060512b.htm

to just list a few.

The consensus seems to be that withholding the truth about neighbourly spats may have costly repercussions.

I think this is good advice. You may be in the right and they are wrong, but if you have to declare a dispute (and if you start raising formal complaints this is what you are planning to do ie create a formal dispute) and then have to outline the details then who will buy your house? I certainly would not.

Sometimes you need to bite your lip, smile and get on with life.

mustrum_ridcully

Agree with harrup. Any sensible buyer will ask "do you have any problems with your neighbours?" and if you say "no" and don't mention anything on the SPIF you could have made a costly mistake.

The classic case is McMeekin v Long, telling porkies resulted in the buyer being awarded damages and legal costs of over £60k http://www.thelawyer.com/true-to-form/106452.article

Dontknow_2

harrup wrote: »

Dontknow wrote: »

Completely agree - Bitter!



So essentially I'd already have to disclose this dispute..and the fact they called the police on me which amounted to nothing & there is no report of it? Hardly seems fair..
/QUOTE]


I totally agree. And sympathize. It kind of reminds me of the old eBay system where crappy sellers held dissatisfied buyers to ransom via the threat of retaliatory negative feedback! Luckily eBay changed the system.

But I think you misunderstood. Or perhaps I misunderstood? Your neighbour involved the police...but you didn't, the whole thing came to nothing but now you are thinking of filing a formal complaint?

All I was saying was - if you do so ....and you may have beyond valid reasons for doing so - you then have to truthfully declare this "dispute" or action when asked.

Whether this is wise in view that you are thinking of selling your home in the near future....hmmm.

I had a quick google under "declaring dispute with neighbour" and found the following:

to just list a few.

The consensus seems to be that withholding the truth about neighbourly spats may have costly repercussions.

Thanks for that. I feel like they were very very quick to call the police on me over a non issue. They moved it to the next step. Their son aggrevates my children by staring. The dad squares up to me & tells me (twice) to "go back to the usa." There have been loads of issues that have arisen over time (our cat was covered in diesel when we moved here - they made it clear they hate cats - they both are the only ones in our tiny cul de sac that drive diesel cars - hmmm). We are just fed up. We are contantly doing nothing to stop them bullying us.

I have read the above articles - many thanks for those. I know the story about the couple that sued their previous home's owners. Yes, that does scare me but again the police person I spoke to today said that data protection laws prevent these disclosures & the legal cost of bringing someone to court over it makes it highly unlikely to amount to anything. Plus if my neighbours ever did tell the new owners anything about this - they'd look the fools.

I see these articles are from 2007 & later so I wonder if there has been any recent legislation relating to the protection of homeowners & anti social neighbours..

Dontknow_2

satchmeister wrote: »

harrup wrote: »

I think this is good advice. You may be in the right and they are wrong, but if you have to declare a dispute (and if you start raising formal complaints this is what you are planning to do ie create a formal dispute) and then have to outline the details then who will buy your house? I certainly would not.

Sometimes you need to bite your lip, smile and get on with life.

But haven't they officially started the "dispute" when they called the police on me? Or does it start when I call the police on him?

satchmeister

Dontknow wrote: »

satchmeister wrote: »

But haven't they officially started the "dispute" when they called the police on me? Or does it start when I call the police on him?

I am not a lawyer. But my understanding is that a dispute is between two parties ie letters, complaints back and forth between the two. If it is one way ie them to you only, then it is not a legal dispute just the opinion of one party. You would need to check this with a solicitor and many offer 10 minute free consultations and IMHO would be worth finding a solicitor and verifying the facts as they are, and if what you have could be classed as a formal dispute ie one that would need to be declared when selling.

Dontknow_2

satchmeister wrote: »

Dontknow wrote: »

I am not a lawyer. But my understanding is that a dispute is between two parties ie letters, complaints back and forth between the two. If it is one way ie them to you only, then it is not a legal dispute just the opinion of one party. You would need to check this with a solicitor and many offer 10 minute free consultations and IMHO would be worth finding a solicitor and verifying the facts as they are, and if what you have could be classed as a formal dispute ie one that would need to be declared when selling.

Many thanks for this - the law is very vague on what a dispute actually consists of! I will contact a solicitor on this & see what they say...but I think if I did get the police involved from my end then yes, it would be more official as my complaint would "stick" so to speak...99% of the time we all go about our business without any problems...I'm just hoping that continues for the next year!

SuzieSue

Dontknow wrote: »

harrup wrote: »

(our cat was covered in diesel when we moved here they made it clear they hate cats - they both are the only ones in our tiny cul de sac that drive diesel cars - hmmm).

Your neighbours sound mental. I hate cats, so sympathise with them but would never harm them.

If you're not going to make the peace with them, then ignoring them is the best policy.