'The weird things neighbours do' thread

dehydrato

My gran lived in a 4 in a block and there was an elderly gay couple lived above her. Although in their late 60's they had a very active and loud sex life. we were once sitting in Gran's lounge at 2pm having a cuppa and a natter when Gran's ceiling rose fell off the ceiling and the light was shaking and all we heard was one of them shouting "do me up the b*m, you are a BARBARIAN!!!!!".

Was hilarious, poor Gran had to hear that every day!!

narabanekeater

In our old house when we just had DD she asked us to come and hear the voices in her bedroom. Thinking it was some strange game DH and I went upstairs and we too could hear the voices. Upon looking out of the window there was next door 'enjoying' themselves, her on the top of a pink little tikes playhouse and him resting her bum on it. His trousers were round hs ankles. You would also see them taking a heater down to the shed to warm that up to use later for the same reason. Afterwards they would hang the blankets on the line

Tippytoes

Oh, forgot about the numpties who decided they should give their 8 berth tent an "airing" after the winter.....by erecting it in the middle of the road and leaving it there all Sunday afternoon. True....

pulliptears

poppysarah wrote: »

You should just smile and think of his electricity bill.

One of our neighbours has a massively bright spot light. It doesn't normally bother me as it lights half the road up if I come back in the evening...
I do think it must cost them a small fortune though.

it must you know, especially having two of them! I suppose what does make me smile is I live close to a wood so we have lots of foxes in the night. Its not unusual for both of those lights to be on and off for the entire night as Mr Fox and friends check out her bin

thriftymanc wrote: »

That hurts my eyes to look at and it's just a photo, I think I'd go blind if I had to live with it!

To be honest, if I'm asleep I can live with it, it doesn't wake me. If I'm trying to sleep it bothers me. This is how I know it is on for 7 minutes precisely. Spent many a night lying there timing it lol

I did show them that very photo about 6 weeks ago. I asked them to at least turn it down to a minute or two. They have done exactly nothing.

chris_m

pulliptears wrote: »

I did show them that very photo about 6 weeks ago. I asked them to at least turn it down to a minute or two. They have done exactly nothing.

I'd still be considering the air rifle TBH, that's totally unnecessary and way OTT.

Alternatively a nice slightly concave mirror to bounce the light back and focus it on their windows ;-)

fimonkey

I grew up in a terraced council house of non standard costruction (i.e walls made of paper). One day we had new neighbours, an elderly lady and her son - who came round to introduce themselves and we shared a cup of tea. The ladies grand-daughter was at the same school as me and we became friends. About a month after they moved in we heard a low moaning sound from their house - coming from what would be their bathroom. Very ghost-like noise. ... Then on and off we would sometimes hear this moaning, it seemed to move around their top floor -but they never mentioned it. We thought we were going mad, or that we were haunted (my mother in particular beleived in ghosts and truly thought that was the reason).

After a month the council turned up to fit a stair lift - we thought for the old lady. Only after they'd fitted the stairlift did we find out the source of the noise. The old lady had a very disabled daughter. We were so glad we never mentioned the noise to them as it became clear they sacrificed a lot to look after her. .. But how odd they never mentioned it at all? Not even the grand-daughter who I used to play with on an evening ever said anything.

pulliptears

I remember as a kid my bed was on the party wall, the couple next door were nice, normal people. Anyway, lying in bed one sunday morning aged around 9 or 10 I heard, exceptionally loudly from next door's kitchen "BERT! HAVE YOU FARTED!?". Laugh? Couldn't move. Hysterically funny to a child that

lincroft1710

At one time had a (then) newish semi with poor soundproofing. One day in the living room I heard next door neighbour speaking to her young child "XXX, you've w**'d on the carpet!"

Although not a neighbour, some years ago I was walking down the best street in a small town and could see a 1960s Minivan, parked in the front garden of a slightly neglected house and partially screened by a hedge. Suddenly an elderly woman came out of the house, opened the back doors of the van and took out a shovelful of coal. The van was being used as her coal bunker.

pulliptears

Oooh just remembered another!

My ex next door neighbours were both alcoholics, and towards the end of their fairly young lives (50's) not very nice folk. One summer evening they had a friend round for drinks and were, to put it bluntly, ratarsed. Male next door neighbour decides to show his Mate his fish pond which is up a few steps in the back garden (as I said above, our homes are 3 storey at the front). Friend falls and after a lot of yelling we gather from ear wigging in DS's bedroom he thinks his leg is broken.

Paramedics arrive and struggle, by now he's very drunk, very surly and not at all co-operative. Eventually they persuade him into a wheel chair and get him into the house (Cue OH and I legging to the front window to be nosey). Now, the front as I have said is first floor, and drunk man isn't exactly svelte shall we say. He's still sat in the chair effin and jeffin at the paramedics when they gracefully manage to drop him and chair down the last 4 steps. Laugh? I'd got tears streaming down my face. There he lay like a tortoise on his back, strapped into the chair with wheels spinning still swearing and shouting. The picked him up, bundled him in the ambulance and off the went.

I can tell you so many stories about those neighbours. As I say it all ended sadly really with her dying and him not noticing as he was so drunk. Our new ones are very quiet people.

dizziblonde

pulliptears wrote: »

I can tell you so many stories about those neighbours. As I say it all ended sadly really with her dying and him not noticing as he was so drunk. Our new ones are very quiet people.

You didn't live next to my friend did you? She died in a very similar fashion to that - and was bordering on an alcoholic if not definitely there already. Don't believe she had a garden pond though.