Pregnant student needs to raise £400

knithappens

lidlest wrote: »

Well I'm employed and 19 weeks pregnant with SPD.... I'm sure you could do something

SPD has different severities, I had to be signed off work the last 4 months of my pregnancy, as is the case with SPD is gets more severe the further into your pregnancy for some, every person is different.

The OP is trying to do something hence posting here, a lot of employers will not take on someone who is obviously pregnant.

vixxxen

lidlest wrote: »

Well I'm employed and 19 weeks pregnant with SPD.... I'm sure you could do something

I don't think the point is that the OP is suffering from SPD - she already said she's applied for ASDA...the issue is she's already heavily pregnant - I'm 23 weeks and really looking pregnant now so the chances of an employer taking me on now as they know they'll only have 16 weeks of work out of me max before I have to leave again, is unlikely. I'm sure you were employed before your pregnancy or before you started showing?

OP - not sure if anyone's mentioned it but have you thought of/tried mystery shopping? If you have the dedication and time to do as many as possible in a week then you should make a fair amount of money. If you sign up to a few companies, you might get a few shops in the same/similar area on the same day.

lidlest

vixxxen wrote: »

I don't think the point is that the OP is suffering from SPD - she already said she's applied for ASDA...the issue is she's already heavily pregnant - I'm 23 weeks and really looking pregnant now so the chances of an employer taking me on now as they know they'll only have 16 weeks of work out of me max before I have to leave again, is unlikely. I'm sure you were employed before your pregnancy or before you started showing?
.

I don't think 22 weeks is heavily pregnant at all lol, and yes i was employed before i got pregnant but last time i was pregnant I got 2 jobs, one at 20 weeks, another at 25 weeks plus I was a student. We all do what we have to do, and you shouldn;t just give up trying to find work.

As to the severity of SPD, you don't know how severe mine is I will probably have to take maternity early but at the moment I am working through it. Don't have much of a life outside of work though.

abby1234519

mismax wrote: »

Just a thought but what are you studying? There might be options related to that even though you are only part way through your degree

I'm studying English Literature, I have advertised on gumtree for helping with GCSE and Alevel prep, I helped when I was at school with the GCSE kids so have experience. Somebody has actually texted me today, I've replied but am waiting for another reply. I'm not sure how else to advertise, I am suitable for it, I mean if I am averaging a 1st I have a brain!

knithappens wrote: »

you can get a REMO order through the magitrates court for Non resident parents who live abroard, I am pursuing this route for my ex husband who now lives in the states, it takes a while, but worth it in the long run, the thread is here https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/1712689 hope this helps.

the only other thing is ebay ,ebay ,ebay, sell what you can, also look into the hardship fund at college/university they may be abe to help

I'm rooting through the suitcases of clothes (4 :S) as I have a lot of newish stuff I just won't wear for at least a year. Especailly with the weight I've gained!

With regards to the REMO thing, is it worth the stress? I do actually have a boyfriend who one day in the far far future might decide he wants to adopt the baby, I know that sounds presumptious but he seems to be rather excited about it. It wouldn't solve my august rent issue anyway as I am not due till July!

lidlest wrote: »

Well I'm employed and 19 weeks pregnant with SPD.... I'm sure you could do something

I'm also at university 3 days a week which takes the life out of me. I can't walk to university anymore, I don't look particularly pregnant as I am overweight and all of that combined kills me.

knithappens wrote: »

SPD has different severities, I had to be signed off work the last 4 months of my pregnancy, as is the case with SPD is gets more severe the further into your pregnancy for some, every person is different.

The OP is trying to do something hence posting here, a lot of employers will not take on someone who is obviously pregnant.

I walked about 2 miles last week in a day having had no previous problems at all, at 12.30am I was in absolutely agony, my stomach and back muscles were spasming and I phoned the paramedics, I thought I was literally dying. It was so bad I was throwing up :S So have been told to keep my movement down to a minimum, eg get the bus to uni and not to walk much! Which is annoying as I went for the walk to get active again. Bit stumped really.

vixxxen wrote: »

I don't think the point is that the OP is suffering from SPD - she already said she's applied for ASDA...the issue is she's already heavily pregnant - I'm 23 weeks and really looking pregnant now so the chances of an employer taking me on now as they know they'll only have 16 weeks of work out of me max before I have to leave again, is unlikely. I'm sure you were employed before your pregnancy or before you started showing?

OP - not sure if anyone's mentioned it but have you thought of/tried mystery shopping? If you have the dedication and time to do as many as possible in a week then you should make a fair amount of money. If you sign up to a few companies, you might get a few shops in the same/similar area on the same day.

I realised I probably am signed up for a few mystery shopping websites from previous times so am going through to see if I can find out login details, if not I am signing up again! I was employed till January, my temp job finished at HMV and since then I did try looking and stopped looking in February.

lidlest wrote: »

I don't think 22 weeks is heavily pregnant at all lol, and yes i was employed before i got pregnant but last time i was pregnant I got 2 jobs, one at 20 weeks, another at 25 weeks plus I was a student. We all do what we have to do, and you shouldn;t just give up trying to find work.

As to the severity of SPD, you don't know how severe mine is I will probably have to take maternity early but at the moment I am working through it. Don't have much of a life outside of work though.

No, 22 weeks isn't heavily pregnant, but I am also overweight which adds to the physical strain, I'm not horrendously overweight but take into the fact that I've also got dysfibrinogenemia and the result is looking for work at the moment is out of the question. Its pretty likely that once I see the haemotologist in April, I'll be on some form of resting. I don't really think I need to explain it, but I'm currently at a higher risk of heart disease/attack and am short of breath walking up a flight of stairs because of it.
So...can't work.

I obviously have looked into getting a job, I've exhausted most options hence why I came on here asking about other things. I am going to bombard ebay, have listed stuff to sell to music magpie and cex (£35 worth) and so forth. Surveys, mystery shopping (within reason) and the like. £500 is probably an unachievable target mind you

sarahevie

It is hard, my job finished last year on March 15th, I was due 28th June (approx 26 weeks pregnant)

I had 7 interviews but I'll never know if I didn't get the job cos of pregnancy.

I do think though that considering your new boyfriend must be less than 22 weeks, as he's not the father, it seems madness to be even contemplating adoption.

abby1234519

sarahevie wrote: »

It is hard, my job finished last year on March 15th, I was due 28th June (approx 26 weeks pregnant)

I had 7 interviews but I'll never know if I didn't get the job cos of pregnancy.

I do think though that considering your new boyfriend must be less than 22 weeks, as he's not the father, it seems madness to be even contemplating adoption.

I didn't mean it quite as literal as that, I just mean that if one day in the future I get married blah blah blah then I don't want complications. He almost views the baby as his in a weird way. Talks about how he will find something to make him laugh hysterically when he is born etc. I just do my best to ignore him!

I have had a look at the jobs around, best I can do is apply for temp admin jobs

[Deleted User]

abby1234519 wrote: »

Unfortunately he wants nothing to do with baby Joshua, it was one of those accidental "I'm at university had an accident but hey I'll take responsibility but the boy just would rather I had an abortion and when I don't he declares he isn't going to be involved full stop" situations.

And as he intends to move to Japan after he graduates this summer I don't really have any way of getting support. And he doesn't plan to. So unfortunately I am having to go down the single mother route and sort it out myself. Not ideal.

So today I will ebay everything!

If I were you I would still contact CSA and open a case.

I cannot comment on how this may work out (but hopefully they can clarify and advise- or someone else here more knowledgeable) I have no children and I have never had any dealings with them, but if the baby's father returns to the UK ever you will get CSA payments, and with my little understanding, as far as I can understand, then you should get arrears paid to you (but only from when a case was opened with them - so if I were you try an pre-empt this and open a case - after all it takes two to make a baby!).

D9

Poosmate

I agree with all who suggest getting in touch with the CSA.

Does the father's family know he's going to be a dad? Could it be possible that even if he doesn't want anything to do with the baby, Josh's paternal grandparents aunt/uncles may want to be in the picture?

I know if one of my brothers got a girl pregnant, even if it was "a mistake", my mom would still want a relationship with her grandchild.

Sorry if this sounds harsh, but I do think it's very sad that people can deny grandparents and aunts and uncles relationships with their kin and likewise parents denying their children relationships with their blood family.

Otherwise, congratulations on trying to do the best for yourself and your son's future. Good luck with the Ebaying.

Poo

abby1234519

Poosmate wrote: »

I agree with all who suggest getting in touch with the CSA.

Does the father's family know he's going to be a dad? Could it be possible that even if he doesn't want anything to do with the baby, Josh's paternal grandparents aunt/uncles may want to be in the picture?

I know if one of my brothers got a girl pregnant, even if it was "a mistake", my mom would still want a relationship with her grandchild.

Sorry if this sounds harsh, but I do think it's very sad that people can deny grandparents and aunts and uncles relationships with their kin and likewise parents denying their children relationships with their blood family.

Otherwise, congratulations on trying to do the best for yourself and your son's future. Good luck with the Ebaying.

Poo

I knew two weeks after conception that I was pregnant, told him straight away, his mum was told when I was around 1 month pregnant her reaction apparently was "I'm too old for this" and also wanted me to "get rid". He told his father in January. I am obviously going on what he has said but I believe it to be true, hes not a lying type. Neither parent (seperated one lives in Manchester one lives in Tokyo) have bothered to contact me, seems neither cares. I think I might have tracked his mothers address down as her first initial and surname were listed on an address and then names matching (or rather initials) himself and brother were on it up till when they left for uni. His dad is on facebook, his mother is on facebook albeit private profile. I just don't have it in me to message them when his entire side of the family don't appear to care!

So struggle alone it is. It appears today in this fruitful evening I may have made around £65, some from ebay, some from music magpie and some from taking stuff to CEX tomorrow. Listed my digital dictaphone on amazon for £130 which undercuts all the other buyers so we shall see how that does!

ERICS_MUM

abby1234519 wrote: »

So struggle alone it is. It appears today in this fruitful evening I may have made around £65, some from ebay, some from music magpie and some from taking stuff to CEX tomorrow. Listed my digital dictaphone on amazon for £130 which undercuts all the other buyers so we shall see how that does!

wow, well done !

Personally I would be so annoyed by the apparent attitude of his parents that I would have to play devil's advocate and get in touch with them somehow!

Maybe send a copy of your baby's scan to his mum or send friend requests to mum and dad on FB and let them know how you are getting on with the pregnancy (in a chatty way, you obviously assuming they would like to know ) .

Sorry if this seems very aggressive, but I hate people like this "getting away with it". They don't have to meet Joshua or have a relationship with you both but they should seriously consider helping their grandson financially.

Good luck. :beer:

Linda xx