Start of my Debt-Free Journey

[Deleted User]

L,
Hope youre enjoying your week off and the weather is being kind to you- its lovely here so am about to have a picnic in the garden with DS and his friend, not planning on spending much on this week off.
Have a great week x

backinbusiness

lilykins wrote: »

Still plodding on- managed to pay one catalogue off completely today- I have owed on this catalogue for years. The final £75 paid today- what a feeling- better than shopping!!

I love, love, LOVE that you are finding settling your debts more satisfying than shopping.

Well done you and keep at it!

BiB

[Deleted User]

Hi All, hope youve enjoyed the Bank Holiday. Myself, DH and DS have had a lovely day watching wedding, have spent no money!! Ate lovely food (all budgeted and planned in weekly budget) and stayed home, all cosy, a really lovely day (previously would have gone shopping)- now can think of nothing worse.

Plus another three days of the weekend to go. Have had the week off work and cant believe how much more relaxed I feel, I love my job but not really looking forward to going back on Tues, its been great to have time with family, catch up with housework and generally live at a 'normal pace'. But I realise I am lucky to have a job and have the focus of becming debt-free.

When I first started posting someone warned me that the early weeks of tackling debt can be easier cause the euphoria of dealing with the problem carries you along, I see what they mean now, although I can honestly say I dont think I will ever go back to spending money carelessly cause of all the worry and misery it has caused, I feel a bit in limbo now, I am plodding on but patience has never been my strong point (another fault I have!!). I need to call all my lenders to check on what I now owe, may be pleasantly surprised.

Thanks all for your posts and support :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

[Deleted User]

Have managed to update my signature since I have re-calculated my debts.

I am pleased to report I have paid £3200 in last three months. Would have liked to pay off more but few unexpected expenses cropped up. Not sure how the CC debt went up not down since I havent used them once since March, I have however transferred one to interest free so had charges for that and have only been making min payments since they are interest free.

Have had some difficult times, have had to buy some clothes since I have put so much weight on and nothing fits- only bought the bare-minimum- but just looking at clothes has stressed me- feel that I need them however feel guilty spending the money.

Having tight times at the end of the month but at least not spending on the cc. Feel much more in control, however me and DH have discussed re-decorating our bedroom, we both keen to do it, but if I'm honest it'll will end up costing us much more than we can afford (we previously egged each other on to spend)- so I know we need to delay it for a while but am trying to convince myself it wont cost us much, someone, please tell me not to do it!!!!

Would love to hear how everyone is doing.
Cheers

[Deleted User]

Cant believe over 1 month has gone since I last posted. This month has been expensive for a number of reasons, firstly our youngest dog has been ill on three seprate occassons, costing approx £180, that had to go on the credit card as no pennies in account, so am gutted about that. Also went to family wedding (approx 200 miles away), so fuel cost a bomb but managed to get a dress on e-bay for £15, nothing I had fitted (really must put my mind to losing weight). We drove back the same night to save on hotel, but was gutting cause lovely white wine was free and in abundance -just my luck- DH made use of it though.

I have to be honest and say I've taken my eye off the ball a bit, I'd previously been so strict with myself, writing EVERYTHING I or DH spent in a book, havent done it this month, need to start again. I have re-read my diary and realise I have lost some of the motivation I had initally and although havent gone out spending other than for 'essentials', writing it down means I am much more strict and really have to justify what I've bought, so here I go, start again.......

I have spent weekend de-cluttering clothes, some needed to be binned but some stuff can be e-bayed as fairly good makes. The stuff that is too small and I cant wear at mo is vacum packed ready for loft, hopefully I'll need it sometime soon. My wardrobe looks so much better and it will be much easier to chose what to wear each morning- mainly cause theres bug**r all in there, but at least whats in there fits.

So, my plan for this morning is to start a new page in my book for recording spending, here we go again ..........................

beadgirl87

Hello,
I've been reading your whole post, and you were really going for it a few months ago, well done for clearing that £3200 so quickly.
From the posts you mention that you want instant results, could you make a chart with your debts and how much you've paid off so far, them when you are having a bad day to feel better take a look at what you have achieved so far and you will feel pleased with yourself. Have an aim like a holiday or something you will do when you are debt free and think about working towards that thing.
Keep going you are doing so well, even though you have had a bad month, try not to get sucked into it all again, you can get through it!

A shopping tip for you. I find now that as I don't have money I don't want to go shopping, sometimes I think I want new clothes and I see £35 for a top or dress and I think hmm thats 2 weeks food for me or something like that.
Maybe have a small clothing budget, so you are allowed some spending, but you will try and get the item reduced as you won't want to blow the budget on one item.
Also sometimes what I do is if I'm shopping online and I saw stuff I wanted, I would add to basket, then close down the page and have a think about it. Often I don't really need it I just want it, the act of putting in a basket seems to be enough weirdly, then I forget all about it later! Now I rarely go on clothes websites or into town.
During your breaks at work, could you read a book to relax, or take a puzzle book or sewing to do. Then you can see in that time what you have achieved rather than killing time shopping?

Good luck and remember everyone here is able to help you out

AllThatStuffIsJustStuff

Hi Lily,

As promised (several days ago) I am posting here. I've read your diary with interest. It does certainly seem that you have lost some of your initial momentum. I have a few thoughts and questions which may or may not be of interest. Please ignore at will.

You mentioned a bit early on about your OH. How do you see the debt in this respect? Is it mostly/all in your name? Getting PBS to realise that where the debt came from was irrelevant was a big step. You need to look forward and your thinking should be about where you are going to be in the future, not how you got to where you are.

It was really nice to read about you saying how much entertainment your son was getting out of cheap days out. It made me think about our own DS. She's only 2 and half but it really struck me to think about her different toys. Of all the toys she has ever had the one thing she has got the most longevity of entertainment was (and still is) the six foot cardboard tube that our bathroom lino came on. It stands in the corner of her room and she regularly asks me to prop it against a chair so she can run cars down it. She also loves her brio style train set atm. Just picked up a massive set on eBay for £25 for her birthday - probably would have cost getting on for £100 to buy the equivalent new.

In terms of the shopping - would it be too far do you think to describe your old behaviour as addictive? It sounds like it could have been. And then my thoughts are whether the addiction was to the new shiny stuff you were buying or just to the act of shopping. I can't tell which from what you've said here but it might make a difference to how you think about not falling back to it in future.

It is really annoying that a lot of people don't get how wasteful they are being when they buy coffees every day and stuff. You don't need to tell people you are in financial trouble to tell them you don't want to spend money on that sort of thing. Maybe you could say something like "It's nothing personal but I don't drink coffee's in starbucks etc anymore. It occurred to me that that was a lot of money I was spending out on things like that and that is money I could be putting in my son's unviersity fund (or whatever)." Some people will be a jerk but I think a lot more would respect that than they would if you just give them awkward excuses.

My wife and I have both in our own ways found things that allow us to enjoy the money saving experience beyond it's own worth. I've enjoyed the challenge of discovering new recipes and finding ways to make the recipes i already liked to make cheaper. PBS has mostly been engrossing herself in the house development projects -but in a very mse way of working out how to do everything as cheap as possible. Have you found anything like this? I guess these are just specific examples of cheap hobbies.

Anyway, that's enough random comments for tonight. Please do keep posting i the diary so we can read how you are getting along.

[Deleted User]

Keep going you are doing so well, even though you have had a bad month, try not to get sucked into it all again, you can get through it!

Beadgirl, thank you so much, your tips are gratefully recieved. I did aviod the shops for many weeks initially however in recent weeks I have been wandering round them, buying very little, perhaps the odd sale item but thats still spending I didnt want to do.
Youre right, I need to avoid them again and read or sew in my lunchtime.
Thank you very much.
The early days of posting were very motivating however I feel that they must get a bit boring for readers so I've not posted regularly. Your response has really motivated me and I vow to avoid those blooming shops again, thank you

[Deleted User]

AllThatStuffIsJustStuff wrote: »

Hi Lily,

As promised (several days ago) I am posting here. I've read your diary with interest. It does certainly seem that you have lost some of your initial momentum. I have a few thoughts and questions which may or may not be of interest. Please ignore at will.

You mentioned a bit early on about your OH. How do you see the debt in this respect? Is it mostly/all in your name? Getting PBS to realise that where the debt came from was irrelevant was a big step. You need to look forward and your thinking should be about where you are going to be in the future, not how you got to where you are.

It was really nice to read about you saying how much entertainment your son was getting out of cheap days out. It made me think about our own DS. She's only 2 and half but it really struck me to think about her different toys. Of all the toys she has ever had the one thing she has got the most longevity of entertainment was (and still is) the six foot cardboard tube that our bathroom lino came on. It stands in the corner of her room and she regularly asks me to prop it against a chair so she can run cars down it. She also loves her brio style train set atm. Just picked up a massive set on eBay for £25 for her birthday - probably would have cost getting on for £100 to buy the equivalent new.

In terms of the shopping - would it be too far do you think to describe your old behaviour as addictive? It sounds like it could have been. And then my thoughts are whether the addiction was to the new shiny stuff you were buying or just to the act of shopping. I can't tell which from what you've said here but it might make a difference to how you think about not falling back to it in future.

It is really annoying that a lot of people don't get how wasteful they are being when they buy coffees every day and stuff. You don't need to tell people you are in financial trouble to tell them you don't want to spend money on that sort of thing. Maybe you could say something like "It's nothing personal but I don't drink coffee's in starbucks etc anymore. It occurred to me that that was a lot of money I was spending out on things like that and that is money I could be putting in my son's unviersity fund (or whatever)." Some people will be a jerk but I think a lot more would respect that than they would if you just give them awkward excuses.

My wife and I have both in our own ways found things that allow us to enjoy the money saving experience beyond it's own worth. I've enjoyed the challenge of discovering new recipes and finding ways to make the recipes i already liked to make cheaper. PBS has mostly been engrossing herself in the house development projects -but in a very mse way of working out how to do everything as cheap as possible. Have you found anything like this? I guess these are just specific examples of cheap hobbies.

Anyway, that's enough random comments for tonight. Please do keep posting i the diary so we can read how you are getting along.

Thank you very much for your consideration and comments, they are very welcome. You are extremely insightful regarding my previous spending, the debt was mainly built up by myself, on both mine and DH cc's. We have been married for 16 years, started with no debt, then got one credit card after another, convincing ourselves we could cope with the payments.

A few house moves and holidays later plus my spending (which wasnt on designer items or anything like that), and we are in the position of 30K debt.

My DH is wonderful, but he is very laid back and although wants to deal with the debt and helps me budget and sticks to his side of the bargin, he doesnt shout or tell me off when I've spent something I shouldnt have, he does everything to try to avoid arguement. But I realise I am not a child and I know what I need to be doing.

You are right, I have lost the initial momentum, and although I'm not using the credit cards, I am back to wandering round the shops at lunchtime, convincing myself that I need that dress, ohh and it is a bargin, its down to £12 from £30. But that £12 could have been paid off cc.

So thank you for that, you and beadgirl have been great, I realise people have their own problems and am very touched you bothered to make comments, I assure you that your time isnt wasted, I intend to aviod the shops for the next week and will post on here daily to let everyone know how I've done.

Thanks guys, good luck to all DFW's out there

Hovel_lady

Hello lilykins,
Just been catching up with your diary. The diary is for you so post as much or as little as you want. I've found it really helpful to put something on every day and keep my spending diary on there too. Makes me think twice before spending if I know the world might be wondering why I've spent money on (fill in what you "waste" money on. For me previously too many cafe trips) when we owe £21k.
It's going to be a long road to being debt free for us and I want instant results too. I'm naturally very impatient. But we will all get there.
Use this for support - my diary is really helping me.
My OH and I have previously egged each on to spend money we didn't have. We have now agreed absolutely not to and so far it's working well.
As I'm not working and have the time I'm taking the lead on this and it's a great "project" to be involved in. Thats how I'm looking at it. A project - see how cheaply we can live without being miserable because we never have any fun - rather than something forced on us.
Good luck with it, you're doing great.
Will be subscribing xx