Re the too frugal post

bluebag

Was just talking about this on one forum the other day, debt problems leave their mark.

My thoughts are, once debts are paid off a good budget should include an amount for recreation and a little fun.

Your frugal ways can pay off in making the amount budgeted for holidays and fun go as far as possible.

Booking late/early to get a discount, free child places, going out of season using loyalty points and lots of other ways to save mean having fun doesn't have to land you back in the financial mire.

As in all things in life, it's about balance.

Derivative

Nothing wrong with being frugal.
Money can do so much more than buy trinkets and holidays - money buys you security.

chevalier

Hi there
I am guessing you need a comfort blanket of savings!

I would suggest therefore that you both save 6 months worth of wages (I used to say 3 but probably not long enough in the current climate to get another job). Once that is achieved, then you can relax knowing that whatever happens you are safe financially.

You might also want to look at cover that you couldn't justify before eg life insurance or other insurances...

chev

getagrip83

at the risk of being drummed out of the forum before even getting started!

its a question of how big a financial security blanket does one need?

You all sound delightfully balanced about ngwm's comments but...

either i am older or have had too much of a calvinist scots upbringing.

done all the mse stuff to get debt and mortgage free, and just when you think its safe to go into the water the s**t hits the fan. DS1 is daignosed with a chronic illness (type 1 diabetes) and therefore is going to need provision for medical bills. I know we're spoilt husband's company currently picks up the tab but that won't last for ever.

So that blanket?

quantic

I feel very similar to the OP about debt, until I was about 21 I didn't even have an overdraft on my current account (card would decline anything if i didn't have available funds, didn't even have a unapproved overdraft). Didn't take out any student loads as I worked during Uni, so until about the age of 22 I had absolutely no debt. Took out a loan to buy a new car when I got my first proper job after Uni, then bought a house, so went from having about 20k in the bank for deposit to being around 2.8k into a overdraft/credit card and a mortgage.

This made me very nervous indeed for a little while, I have since settled my car loan, overdraft and credit card, but I believe this has changed me permanently. I am now a strong believer of saving up to pay for things instead of buying them on credit. I think sometimes it makes a positive change to the way I think but sometimes I don't enjoy things due to the cost of them.

karren

Hi we were lucky enough to be debt free until last year when we took out an £8,000 loan to buy a car and have £60,000 morgage but apart from that my motto is well if we cant afford to pay for it we cant have it, so yes we dont have latest consoles or gadgets that gather dust be live life to full and kids are happy xxx

determined_new_ms

415SanFran wrote: »

You know I was having a conversation with a friend of mine around christmas time who was feeling quite guilty about how little she had to spend in comparison to some others at the school. I then told her to think back to her Christmas's and asked her what she got when she was 10, she had to idea, she said out of all the childhood gifts she could really remember was her brothers lego and her etch-a-sketch because that was the two main things that they had played with for the next couple of years to come.
My children have had lots of holidays over the years but they one that they remember the most was a 10pound holiday out of the Sun newspaper to Wymouth, that had cost the least.
Do not feel quilty, feel proud that your children do not have to go to the door and tell lies that you are not there because it is another dept collector that you cannot face.
(I had to do this the other day at my sisters house, mostly she does not answer her door)

OMG that just brought back memories of going to the door to tell the collection person my ma wasn't there while she hid behind the sofa... things haven't changed that much then!

Rachel021967

Good on you for getting out of debt. Your not being tight just careful. The greatest gift you can give your children is time and the ability to stand on their own two feet when they're adult. Part of this is financial management which they are getting by following your example. You are brilliant parents and deserve a pat on the back.

dave1961

Hi,
We became debt free about 2 years ago, after a 6/7 year stint, to pay off, 43 k in debts...the usual stuff and 65k in mortgage. When we first started out on out debt free trek, I was given some sound advice about starting the journey, and something my advisor called the year of pain...which for us was 2004.

This year of pain we did nothing, had nothing, bought nothing, but focus on our debts and how to get rid of them. A side effect was a change of mind set, we became positive people, always having a goal to work towards is a sure fire way of deflecting some of the pain we went through in that year.

It seems to me you have had this change of mind set, no you are not too frugal, after having had debts, you can never be too frugal !

However without a plan for the future, are you just doing it out of habit ? and as we all know habits can lead us to dark places...challenge your habits, stay in the light, don't just drift along, now your debt free...make the next plan.

Last thing, well done on becoming debt free, it takes a lot of energy and hard work, just to do that. You have done good !:T

jackieb

You've done really well getting out of debt and changing your mindset. I think the moneypots are a really good idea. Just spend with what you are comfortable with. A wee note of caution though. My aunt and uncle were very frugal, all throughout their lives. They were always working. They had no children. Never had a car. Nothing to spend their money on but themselves, which they very rarely did. My uncle would re-use one teabag for the whole day - that kind of thing. When my uncle took ill, he was in hospital for about 18 months. My aunt went completely the other way and would sometimes get 2 taxis a day to see him, 20 miles away. On Christmas day she took a taxi to hospital and it cost her £100. Their nest egg disappeared and when he died it was fortunate he'd take out a pre-paid funeral as they had no money left. His sisters were left to buy him a suit to get buried in. I just think of all the years they went without. They had the means to do things, go places, buy clothes other than from the charity shop, but didn't. I don't think you need to go overboard, and I think you're sensible about money, but please enjoy some of it.