How much should I charge for my son & daughter @ home (age 23, 20)

Savvy_Sue

pollyanna24 wrote:

But I don't think we will ever get rid of him if we only charge that much! :eek:

Oh, there are other ways of encouraging them to leave as well as charging them a realistic rate ... Like jobs around the house: we're a family not a hotel, so if you're asked to do something, you get on and do it. And you do your own laundry once you're over 16 / in the 6th form.

pollyanna24 wrote:

Think I will put up with it for a while and then suggest increasing it if he hasn't gone back to Dad.

That seems the best thing to do for now, given your bf's feelings, but I would definitely be keeping an eye on all the bills and expenses and seeing if they go up by more than 1/3 once he's with you ...

pollyanna24 wrote:

What do others think? Should I be firm now? He's having a bit of a tough time at the mo?

So, if he's having a tough time, it can be worth cutting him a bit of slack, but not too much. Presumably there is a reason he is no longer living with his dad, and you may only have half the story ...

pollyanna24 wrote:

He has already starting treating me like his mother which I can't say I'm too happy about. :mad:

So I guess that's not flowers and chocolates? :rotfl:(I can dream ... I usually take something to my mum and get something for DH's mum, but then we don't live with them ...)

This lad might actually need a little bit of mothering for a while - not knowing anything about the situation, it's hard to say. But your house, your rules, at the end of the day ... and presumably your bf doesn't want you uncomfortable with the situation either. So talk to him, talk to the lad, set the ground rules and hope for the best!

pooranddesperate

gosh, i'm glad my mum and dad don't come on this site as they dont charge me anything!

I know that lots of people think that this will mean that i don't understand the value of money but it's not true - i have lived away from home but came back when i returned to studying and am now working again and saving up for a house. If they started charging me rent it would take me a lot longer to move out and I think they just want rid! i think if i was blowing all my wages and not being sensible about saving then they might start charging..

i think how much you charge depends on your circumstances (fortunately my parents don't need any money from me), and the circumstances of your kids.

raq

I agree. 10 years ago I was paying myparents £120.00 for the month. Good food on the table, all clothes washed but no cleaner ( except my mother of course ). I also would charge a little more. A lot of friends I know don't take anything from them and except their parents to hand out money left right and centre. Some kids just don't know the importance of money

iceicebaby

When I was at home and got my first job I was earning £89 per week and my parents had £30 of that so i would say that a third is fair.

shariatlanta

My son of 25 pays me £100. per month which is cheap but only because he nows pays £250 per month towards the mortgage, he is part owner of the house with me and his dad. Before this he was paying £200.00 which he though was fair.
My youngest DS gives me £20.00 per week but as he only works part time I'm happy with this. DD will be starting full time work shortly and I will be charging her £150.00, she'll be on 15k a year again she's happy with this.
Tell your son that if he can find somewhere to live, paying rent and all utilities for £30.00 per week could he let me know as I'll move there as well;)

Phil_rich

My brother who still lives at home with our parents is 24 and earns about £24k but he only pays £60 per week, but he also pays for the sky tv (£40 per month). Although my parents only allow him to pay so little as they have made him set up a savings account and he has to put in £150 per week.

They said they will charge him £130 per week if he stops saving and just wastes his money.

pbfhpunk

Oh lord!! I feel such a spoilt brat now!! I thought it was a hardship when my parents made me pay £10 a week when I was on the dole and £20 when I had a job!!! But at the time none of my friend's had to pay anything. My parents didn't need the money I think they were just trying to teach us that we couldn't stay at home and not pay anything! Even if it was only a token amount.

melt71

Alan, If your son moaned that you are charging him too much and it's STILL only £40 a week, I'm afraid he's taking the !!!!!

When I was at home as soon as I got a job at 16 my mum and dad charged me £120 per month all in - that was HALF my wages. We are talking 19 years ago!! My take home pay was £60 a week and I had to pay for my bus fares out of this. I had all my food from home including my lunches, but I had to do all of my own cooking and my own washing/ironing. I thought the rent was high, but by the time I was 18 I moved out and at 20 I bought my own house, it taught me to BUDGET and I've always been good with money since then.

They have gone completely the other way with my sister (11 years younger than me - now 24) They let her live there rent free, paid her mobile phone bill until she was 23! :eek: and are now saying that they will help her to purchase a car. Guess what? She is clueless about finances, she hasn't got a hope of managing on her own and she has actually admitted that she NEVER wants to leave home. Why should she when she's got it so cushy. But they are actually not doing her any favours in my eyes.

sloppychops

lottee wrote:

20 & 23, omg I was hoping my son would be gone at 16 !!! Either that or I will go !!!:rotfl:

I also used to say that.My 21 year old son has just left home to live with his girlfriend and my it hit me badly.I thought someone had ripped my heart out and for days welled up every time someone mentioned his name.I am ok now and getting used to him not being around but god do i miss him and his untidiness.

taplady

This has made very interesting reading for me as my 16 year old son is going for his first interview today and should he get the job I like the idea of the 3rd housekeeping, 3rd saving and 3rd spending. We are in the process of trying to get debt free and desparately dont want our son to make our mistakes with money.