Bloody Husband

Hereward

CFC wrote:

If a man said that about his wife and it was true, well I was brought up to tell the truth and shame the devil. I wouldn't think it was terrible. Some people do behave in a very adolescent manner.

Often men accuse women of being controlling and/or nagging simply because a lot of males are irresponsible. I have to say that when I've been part of a group of women getting together and talking about our males, I dont too often hear the girlies being that complimentary.

I suppose I see it this way, Lynzpower - if someone wants to do exactly what they want and run up debts, that's fine, doesn't bother me, providing they have not intertwined themselves financially with me.

But generally one finds out about those situations AFTER you've got financially intertwined, or they tell you that they've changed and after it's too late you find that isn't true, or you get told some other such gubbins.

So personally I think that it's fine to control another person in the pursuit of self-protection. If you're with someone, sometimes you need to protect yourself from that other person laying waste to your joint future or present.

We're not talking about being MSE, or choosing to not to save, we're talking about building up debts.

I don't go much for human rights either. Isn't that the one where yobbos can do what they want on the streets, and prisoners can sue the Gov't for issues arising out of being imprisoned? And you can't stop prisoners taking drugs? Ah, yes. So it is. We'll have to agree to differ.

If we're using generalisations then most women on here are in debt because they like shoes and handbags (ouch that stone hurt!).

Of course you find out about partner's financial situations when its too late, but a few clues should be obvious way before then, their job, where they take you, etc. If you want to be financially independent of them, then it is fairly easy not have joint accounts and assets.

I won't even get started on your views about Human Rights.

CFC

I have to confess that I'm the kind of girl who DOES love shoes and handbags, but I've taught myself to always hunt in the sales!

Darn it, you found out my secret vice!!!

However, my secret vices aside, if you live with a partner who is in financial trouble, even if you don't have joint accounts and assets (bearing in mind that being married pretty much gives the other person 50% share of a house, regardless of who put the money in it), you will be financially interlinked and start to find your credit rating going down the pan after theirs. It is difficult to get UN-interlinked if you are married or living together, no matter how much you tell a credit agency that you are each responsible for your own debts. You can get financially dissassociated from an ex.

fairenoughclough

Best of luck.

I've never understood people who pay excessive bank charges, the very last people I want to take my money are the faceless overpaid and underdeveloped personalities known as bankers.

Off the top of my head i can think of at least 100 better ways to use my money.