How to Get Through The Tough Times The Old Style Way.

candygirl

Zara, sounds like all 3 of em need a good horse whipping:mad::mad::mad:Think it's time for some ground rules for them hun, and maybe a rota.Nag nag and nag again, you deserve to be treated better than this:A

mardatha

On a more general note, OS can be hard. That's why we all got seduced by modern living in the first place. It does take a lot more work and effort and energy doesn't it ? And it does get us all down at some point or other. We get overtired, hurt yourself, ache, feel resentment, bad temper. I know I do often. And then I tell myself to get over myself. :rotfl::rotfl: Keep on keeping on everybody ! xxx

honeybun16

((Hugs )))) Zara

ubamother

zarazara wrote: »

Well, I've just been crying. DH ,who works shifts wanted a lie in this morning, so I went out to feed the animals and muck out. The problem is that I cant handle the colts onmy own and they need more familiarisation with feet being picked out, grooming and leading. The horsey folk among you will understand this. Now, DH isnt a horseman by any stretch of the imagination, but hes good at holding them whilst I groom and he sort of mucks out and will put hay in the racks. This morning it all went terribly wrong, one lead rein broke, I got bitten, I ended up loosing my temper and smaking one of the colts and now I'm very upset. I just cannot do it on my own whilst they are at this stage of their education and now I've made it all worse. He works shifts and isnt there most of the time to help me. Them I get back home and I have to cook sunday luch [all 3 men in the house are still in bed at this point] its 9am, so i peel veg etc, theres 2 stables to muck out and sheep to feed. no one helps, and if i ask they do they look hurt etc and i feel bad. Then I think of my late father who every week, without fail,took my mum out ,on a fri night for a meal "to save her having to cook" he used to say, infact the whole family often went. And she didnt have animals or hobbies except knitting,she sent washing to the laundry ever yweek,had a cleaner on a monday and was treated like royalty. Dad had a decent job. I can get very depressed at times. Sorry to rant but its all too much sometimes,cooking and baking and growing veg just because eveeythings too expensive , I only have the colts beacaue I cant afford a riding horse and there as to be 2 because they dont do living on their own, 1 of them actually belongs to my son as in he pays for its food but he never grooms it or traind it or mucks it out,I have to do all that stuff. I find it all too hard sometimes.

I'm so sorry you've having such a tough time. I can hear their poor tired overworked hurt (!) voices saying - you wanted horses - so it's up to you. I can also hear what my voice would say - you want feeding/a clean house/nice veg - it's up to you.

To give yourself back some control, is it worth simply dropping the whole Sunday lunch thing until you have some more help from the blokes? So many men, in my experience, are stomach-led! Could the horsey son not come and help with their training on a Sunday (in return for being fed)? If your need to feed them Sunday lunch is too strong, loads can be done the night before and reheated - mash, carrots etc.

In the meantime, as those in your household sound old enough to take themselves to the toilet and entertain themselves etc. if it was me, I would take myself off to bed with a good book and sulk for the afternoon - sod the washing up/cleaning etc. for the day.

ampersand

zarazara wrote: »

Well, I've just been crying. DH ,who works shifts wanted a lie in this morning, so I went out to feed the animals and muck out. The problem is that I cant handle the colts onmy own and they need more familiarisation with feet being picked out, grooming and leading. The horsey folk among you will understand this. Now, DH isnt a horseman by any stretch of the imagination, but hes good at holding them whilst I groom and he sort of mucks out and will put hay in the racks. This morning it all went terribly wrong, one lead rein broke, I got bitten, I ended up loosing my temper and smaking one of the colts and now I'm very upset. I just cannot do it on my own whilst they are at this stage of their education and now I've made it all worse. He works shifts and isnt there most of the time to help me. Them I get back home and I have to cook sunday luch [all 3 men in the house are still in bed at this point] its 9am, so i peel veg etc, theres 2 stables to muck out and sheep to feed. no one helps, and if i ask they do they look hurt etc and i feel bad. Then I think of my late father who every week, without fail,took my mum out ,on a fri night for a meal "to save her having to cook" he used to say, infact the whole family often went. And she didnt have animals or hobbies except knitting,she sent washing to the laundry ever yweek,had a cleaner on a monday and was treated like royalty. Dad had a decent job. I can get very depressed at times. Sorry to rant but its all too much sometimes,cooking and baking and growing veg just because eveeythings too expensive , I only have the colts beacaue I cant afford a riding horse and there as to be 2 because they dont do living on their own, 1 of them actually belongs to my son as in he pays for its food but he never grooms it or traind it or mucks it out,I have to do all that stuff. I find it all too hard sometimes.

###########
Dear z - [have just seen this by chance]and send hugs first and foremost, but they cannot remedy these habits, probably unrecognised and unthinking.

So -

Please print this and either hand it to one/all of them, or put it up where it will be seen and read.

PLEASE:) .

Butterfly_Brain

(((((Hugs)))) zarazara - I would just tell them that I am selling the horses if they can't be asked to help out. I would book a week in a motel and let them get on with it.

GreyQueen

:grouphug: Hugs, Zara, that's enough to make anyone feel overwhelmed , tearful and bl**dy resentful. Reminding myself of the final page of Shirley Conran's Superwoman book (which was all about cutting out the carp anmd skiving whenever possible; this woman reckoned that if microwaves had existed in her day that her first marriage might not have failed).

Anyway, the joke is that Husband comes home from work and finds Wife sitting with her feet up reading a book and eating chocolates. The house is filthy, pans are boiling over, two small children are trying to kill each other and another is strangling the cat.....When Hubby asks what the hell is going on, Wifey says calmly that she thought the easiest way to show him what she did all day is to stop doing it!

Sweetheart, take a cuppa to bed with something sweet to eat and leave them without domestic services for a few hours or days......

Nelski

Some great advice happening from our newest OS recruit here

https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/3052532

bars open by the way if anyone wants to drop in for a sherry

honeybun16

hey guys, just made my first lot of Twinks and i just had to say, thank you so much for pointing me in the direction of the receipe, what can i say, they are lovely, my whole family really likes them and really easy to make, the task now is to see how long the batch last with 6 of us eating them lol

happy35

you have my sympathy, I felt the same as you a little while ago and eventually reached the end of my tether and gave OH the option of shaping up or I was shipping out

He has improved but now thinks he does more than me!!!!!!! he doesn't not by a long way but of course washing isnt a job the machine does it, hoovering is done by the hoover etc

I do still get irritated but at least now I am not doing everything