Unable to pay funeral costs at triple fees.

Deep_Ocean

Hi,

Could anybody offer me any advice to pass on to my Nan in this unfortunate scenario?

Her son was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in November 2010. He passed away 12th December 2010. The funeral arrangements were made for a burial in the new burial ground local to where he was born and where his mom had lived for all of his life. He went to school in this village and grew up there; he finally had to move out the village when he got a council flat as there were none available in this area. He was on the waiting list for council accommodation in this village for his entire life.

Anyway, once the funeral arrangements had been made and a notification had been put in the local paper, my Nan was notified that as he was not a resident in this village she will be liable to pay triple fees for the funeral costs. She is in her 70’s and looks after her disabled daughter full time. She is dependant on benefits and has no way of finding this money.

The fees have risen from around £3,000 to somewhere near £7,000 (These are not exact figures, as I am going off memory; I am able to find out the exact figures if required for this discussion).

My Nan is really upset about the whole scenario, and suffers with a heart condition as well. She has contacted the council who were very rude to her over the phone and reduced her to tears. They said that she has to pay the fees, if she doesn’t it will be a paupers grave and anybody else can be buried there and she will not be allowed to put a headstone on.

She is beside herself with worry, I have never seen her cry until these recent times, and she is constantly in tears about everything. She has spoken to ‘citizen’s advice’ who said that her only option is to appeal but it might not really get anywhere.

The only option that I can see is if I take out a loan to give her the money, but I am a full time student and will probably not be able to get a loan. None of the family is financially comfortable especially in this difficult economy, we could have scraped together the money at a single rate, but triple fees are too difficult to find.

Can anybody offer me any comfort or advice for which I can pass onto my Nan?

Thank you in advance.

DX2

She won't get anywhere near what she is needing, but has she applied for a funeral grant from the DWP?

Funeral grant details here: http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/MoneyTaxAndBenefits/BenefitsTaxCreditsAndOtherSupport/Bereaved/DG_10018660

Deep_Ocean

Yes, she got £1,500ish grant I think. We could afford the single fee just about, we could get £1,500 between us, but it's the triple fee that is causing the problem. We need to find £5,500 to cover the £7,000. This is the problem. If they would reduce the fees to what residents pay we could afford it, but as he was not a resident we have to pay the triple fees. Even though my Nan is a resident and he went to the Church school, was Baptised and Confirmed at the Church, but as he had left the area my Nan is left with this bill which is triple to what somebody would pay who moved into the area 6 months ago.

parsons

Deep_Ocean wrote: »

Yes, she got £1,500ish grant I think. We could afford the single fee just about, we could get £1,500 between us, but it's the triple fee that is causing the problem. We need to find £5,500 to cover the £7,000. This is the problem. If they would reduce the fees to what residents pay we could afford it, but as he was not a resident we have to pay the triple fees. Even though my Nan is a resident and he went to the Church school, was Baptised and Confirmed at the Church, but as he had left the area my Nan is left with this bill which is triple to what somebody would pay who moved into the area 6 months ago.

I may be sounding a bit thick here, but why are there two rates?
Is this a church burial on private grounds or a council run one?

I have no experience of council run cemetries, but certainly do have of private church burials.

All of my family and extended family are buried in a small village church. Some have never lived in the area. It is just the familly church going back generations.

We were married in that church and had to arrange the wedding from 400 miles away.

I have just buried my uncle there.
There was never any question of extra costs involved just because of the residency of the deceased.

Who is dictating these extra costs?

I do hope this is not a case of a council run thing, looking to increase their 'income'?

Deep_Ocean

It is council run. For whatever reason South Staffordshire council charge triple fees for non residents, well at least they do in this particular burial ground. I expect it is due to the lack of space. It is a new burial ground as the church yard became full. I guess that they want to discourage non residents from taking up the plots. I can understand this really, but I believe that they should make allowances in this case, simply as he went to their church school, was baptised and christened and grew up in this village and was a very popular and well known member of the community.

But above all, my Nan is very, very distressed, so much so that I am concerned about her health and she suffers with a heart condition herself. This added worry on top of losing her son is not helping her health. But I am appalled by the treatment that she was given oven the phone from a council member called Howard, who showed no sympathy and was rude to her, telling her that she will have to pay otherwise his grave will be a paupers grave and other will be buried there and no headstone allowed. This was unnecessary and uncalled for and put my Nan in emotional turmoil even further. This is no way to treat a lady in her mid 70’s.

meg72

Hi big hugs to you and your Nan its a rotten situation.

I am wondering if perhaps your Nan has maybe misunderstood something here? She must be ina terrible state.Is it possible for you to contact the council and verify this.

If it turns out to be right then I would sugget you contact your local
paper and your MP, its outrageous that she should be expected to pay this extra amount.

Best of luck love hope this turns out OK.

System

meg72 wrote: »

I am wondering if perhaps your Nan has maybe misunderstood something here? She must be ina terrible state.Is it possible for you to contact the council and verify this.

It appears to be S Staffordshire policy, primarily to preserve plots for the locals.

This link for Wymbourne cemetery gives details

Deep_Ocean

meg72 wrote: »

Hi big hugs to you and your Nan its a rotten situation.

I am wondering if perhaps your Nan has maybe misunderstood something here? She must be ina terrible state.Is it possible for you to contact the council and verify this.

If it turns out to be right then I would sugget you contact your local
paper and your MP, its outrageous that she should be expected to pay this extra amount.

Best of luck love hope this turns out OK.

Thank you Meg, that’s very nice of you,

My Mom has been on the phone to the council and asked for a complaints form about the way in which my Nan was treated over the phone. My uncle went with my Nan to talk with citizen’s advice bureau who suggested trying an appeal. My mom has written to the local MP without success, she is going to write another letter today. I like the idea of writing to the paper; I might take in on myself to do this, thank you for that suggestion.

So collectively we have contacted the council, CAB, Funeral directors, MP, DHSS and have hit a brick wall each time.

I am going to my Nan’s this afternoon to get copies of all the letters and try and resolve this matter somehow. But I am not really sure who else that I can contact, other than the same people again. I am not sure that this will achieve anything. But I will write to the paper as you have suggested.

Thank you Meg

Deep_Ocean

!!!!!! wrote: »

It appears to be S Staffordshire policy, primarily to preserve plots for the locals.

This link for Wymbourne cemetery gives details

this is the Cemetery where he is buried,


* All fees are trebled for those residing outside the District *

Oldernotwiser

Wouldn't it be easier for him to be cremated; many people can't afford burials these days.

Deep_Ocean

Oldernotwiser wrote: »

Wouldn't it be easier for him to be cremated; many people can't afford burials these days.

It would have been but it’s a bit late now!!!

We were given the single rate fees when we were speaking to the funeral directors. It wasn’t until the funeral had been announced in the paper that my Nan received a letter saying that she would have to pay triple fees. We have the original invoice of around £3,000 and then the second invoice of around £7,000. If we had realised this at the beginning we may have opted for a cremation, but the original invoice states £3,000ish and we would have all chipped in together to get that money. By the time we received the revised figure we had already made all the arrangements and put the notification in the paper.