Mother and todler groups?

dreambirdie

Does anyone here attend a mother and toddler group? if so could you please tell me what happens at one?

My HV was out visiting my son last week and she suggested it might be a good idea for me to start going to one. i am dealing with post natal depression at the minute and she thought it would be a good thing. i shot her idea down in flames when she suggested it. but the more i have been thinking about it i think it mite be good for me.but i just wanted to know what sort of things you do at it as im very nervous about going!

also my son is 5 months old next week would he be old enough to go? or is it mostly older children?
thank you

pinkshoes

I go to a "stay and play" group since DS was 3 weeks old!

It would probably do you the world of good!

You generally sit round drinking cups of tea, gossiping, chatting, discussing baby problems, and of course playing with babies!! Very informal, no "sitting in a circle and telling life story" sort of thing, everyone really friendly! I really enjoy it.

EDIT: The children are anything from 2 weeks up to about 3 years old.

skylight

Most playgroups are great but likewise some are very cliquey and may take a while for you to break into them. Do you have anyone else you can go with? Another Mum who goes or a friend you can take with you?

It will take a bit of effort to push yourself into coversation at the first few meetings. But it will be good for you to make new friends and be able to get out for a chat, tea and biscuits!

We make a point of being nice to newbies at ours; as most people turn up at ours after trying the other one down the road thats awful. Ours is far more popular! It may take a few goes at different groups to work out which suits you.

And as a last thought (cos Playgroups are far more important for Mums IMO!) it will be good for your little one to socialise too.

Alibear

What area do you live in? I work for a pre-school charity so may be able to help...

mum2twinsx2

I taken my boys since about 8 weeks.
I always tend if its new one, go sit with someone who isnt sat with someone and crack up some baby related coversation. Break by ice asking how old the baby is etc.
Ive made some good friends from toddler groups over the years.
Give it a whirl x

MERFE

I think its good to go to with the little one, their age doesn't matter generally. I would try at the local surestart centre as ours have a toddler group but in the afternoon a newborn to 2yrs group as well and I assume there would be more little ones at that. It just gives you a chance to meet other mums or just get out the house sometimes. I took my son from about 5 months because I was taking DD and they used to get the playmat out for me to put him on so I could have a coffee and chat with the other mums. It takes alot of courage to go for some people and I really have to push myself to go to these things but it is good. The other thing I like to go to is the baby bounce and rhyme time at the library, if yours does one similar it might be good, I like it because its only 30 mins and you sit round and sing some nursery rhymes then leave and sometimes meet mums but if you are too tired to chat you can just leave and its free.

ilovecushions

I used to run a toddler group many years ago and they are very informal. If you feel wary of talking to other mums remember they feel just the same too. You'll find whoever runs them very friendly and they will introduce you to other mums/carers. I loved it more than the the pre school work I did. You don't have to stay for the whole session if you don't want to.

Xaniwoop

I run a mother and toddler group so can tell what mine is like - they are broadly alike but they do vary depending on who goes.

We have lots of toys and activities (painting, playdoh, jigsaws, blocks, cars) set out on tables and carpets and a set aside baby area with baby toys, a baby gym, bouncy chairs and space for babies to roll etc. About 45 min into the session we stop for squash and fruit for the children and a cuppa for the mums, after an hour we all pitch in to tidy up and finish with story/songtime.

As I said they do vary especially with the age of the children going, some can be quite busy and a little noisy if there are lots of older toddlers with energy to burn - if you think that you might feel overwhelmed you can always give the organiser a ring to find out more beforehand. If you find a group on netmums you get contact details.

If you have a children's centre nearby they will have groups that are more defined by age so you can choose something more tailored to your son.

But there is no reason why you couldn't enjoy an ordinary mixed age group. We even have pregnant women occasionally coming to make friends while on mat leave. Wherever you go you'll find mums just like you looking to chat and make friends. If you think you'd struggle to talk to complete strangers why don't you start with rhyme time at your library so you have a focused activity to ease you in to the socialising.

You will feel much better for mixing a bit more. I was very isolated when I had my first baby as I was new to the area and didn't find a group until dd was 9 months old - it was only when I got out there and met other mums that I realised how lonely I had been. I'd really recommend it.

JoJoB

Even though your little boy is only 5 months he will love the atmosphere and enjoy watching the other children. Don't be nervous about having to make conversation, or be self conscious about not knowing anyone - we were all newbies once!

I took my daughter from about 2 months old, and you will find the mothers of the younger children usually sit together as their children will be playing in the section with all the baby toys. On my 2nd and 3rd meetings I made a point of saying hello again to anyone I recognised from the first time round, and made an effort to remember their child's name so I could ask how they were getting on, are they sleeping ok, teething etc. You'll soon find it's a good place for mum's to unload and a fair few of them are bound to be suffering PNS too.

It probably will be good for you just in terms of a change of scene and people to chat to who understand your situation. But don't underestimate how much you can bring to it too - there may well be other mums who feel exactly as you do and having your friendly self to chat to every week will be helping them too.

And of course your little boy will benefit greatly from the social interaction and stimulation.

Don't worry if the first one you try doesn't suit you for whatever reason - there are usually lots in any town. Even the local library is a good place to start for rhyme and sign or storytime sessions which is a very gentle (and short) form of playgroup. Your local surestart childrens centre may have informal coffee morning/drop ins which may be a place to start too.

Sublime_2

I didn't go to toddler groups till mine were 6 months, but thats just me. A lot of mums go with new borns even.

I didn't worry about people talking to me, I just went along for my children. Mine were quite friendly though, so I did end up chatting with quite a few people.

stepharoo

Usually they consist of a bunch of babies and toddlers, with their parents/carers, lots of toys and activities and sometimes tea and coffee facilities for mum. You'll probably be expected to supervise your child, but everyone will be friendly and you're all in the same boat really. Often people will know of other groups and support networks you can go to and then you can go to these knowing there will be a familiar face.

Check out the NCT website and have a look at what's on in your area. You don't have to be a member of the NCT to go If your area has Surestart groups, these are great as well.

it was only when I got out there and met other mums that I realised how lonely I had been. I'd really recommend it.

- THIS SO MUCH! It's taken me 6 months since we moved to where we live now to meet other mums and I am SO SO glad I did.