top table dilemma

xtinkersx

I wish we followed the Americans and just did sweetheart table!! lol

White_Sapphire

xtinkersx wrote: »

I wish we followed the Americans and just did sweetheart table!! lol

Who's to say you can't?

pinkteapot

We had a top table but not in the traditional order (or even content):

Bride's brother
Bride's mother
Bride
Groom
Groom's mother
Groom's father
Groom's brother (best man)

Firstly, I wanted to let my BMs sit out on the tables with their men. Secondly, my mum, my brother and I are a really close family. I couldn't imagine my brother not being with me at that point. Thirdly, I didn't see the point of the way the families mix up (bride's mother with groom's father for example). Our families are pretty different. They get on fine but they're not bosom buddies. It's a long meal. People should sit with people they'd want to sit with.

Dekazer

pinkteapot wrote: »

It's a long meal. People should sit with people they'd want to sit with.

Could't agree more. My BMs/MoH will be sitting with men + kids and friends - why should they have to sit apart? No best man - DF doesn't really want one, so will just have various people in the different bits of the role.

Plus, my family are uneven - Dad remarried, Mum single, one brother, one stepsister, 3 grandparents, while DF's are married parents plus one grandparent. Trying to sort a top table for that lot seems a bit of a struggle!

The other annoying thing with top table sis that they tend to be straight, so you can only talk to the two people either side of you. I'd prefer to sit on a round table, but will see what the venue can manage in terms of space. And I don't need a whole room watching me eat! :rotfl:

purplelotus

we've come to an agreement that if OH's mum's BF says he wants to... he realises it's an honour... he supports us on our wedding and in our marriage... OH's mum means so much to him that her family are important to him too... etc or something similar ... that he's welcome to sit on top table.

But if he's just doing it because he feels obliged then he can sit with his own family. I'm so much happier that we've cleared the air on this one, thanks to you guys for making me tell OH his mum's bf can sit on top table IF... Much better than my previous "no, he's not family"

MrsC....tobe

Sounds like a good plan purplelotus. I'm glad you've come to an agreement over it. I can understand how hard it is as I have warring parents who are both remarried (thats a complication in itself!). You would think that they could put their differences aside for one day but they can't so I'm going for one big table and putting them as far away from each other as I possibly can!!!

floss2

If OH's mum's partner is on the top table, then bump his brother off the top table.....?

Mine was:

Bride's son
MoH
Groom's father
Bride
Groom
Groom's mother
Bride's son
Best man

Both my parents are dead, so my sons took their places - DS1 gave me away, DS2 gave a speech.

munch_jg

When we get married we are having, myself, groom, best man, maid of honour and my daughter at the top table! or i might just have me, the other half and our daughter!

mummyroysof3

we went with 'lets have a buffet and let people sit where they want' reception, only we had a set table as mil had decorated it, solved many problems lol

Curious_George_2

mummyroysof3 wrote: »

we went with 'lets have a buffet and let people sit where they want' reception, only we had a set table as mil had decorated it, solved many problems lol

we are having a buffet too (partly because it bypasses all the top table stress... especially with my family) and there will be dressed tables for people to sit where they wish,

would you think it was weird if you saw a bride and groom with a little table of thier own? so when we do sit to eat it will just be us? and we wouldnt be favouring anyone in particular? plus we might just get a few minutes to ourselves to take it all in?