Benefits for working families

ceejaydee23

ermmmm yes WE got into debt! and until the mess up with the council we were coping with them, so get off your high horse by telling me i'm a failure cos right now you ARE NOT HELPING ME so i wont be listening to you! In fact i wish this thread closed now, i wont be responding again!

Oldernotwiser

tomitma wrote: »

My partner works full time, I currently am not working as i want to continue to help bring our son up like i did my daughter, then return to employment when he's a bit older probably when he's at a preschool or nursery


To be honest i couldnt do evening work, I dont know if its a confidence thing or what but just bringing the bin in the dark gives me the eebie jeebies! I was working part time before i left my job at the end of my maternity pay. as part time hours went i was good paid i was working for the fire service


I've said to my other half, that maybe i have no choice but to seek work again. But the physical idea of leaving my little man only just a year old with anyone makes me feel ill. I mean he even crys when i just nip upstairs to go to the loo!

To be honest we were not in a bad position until our Claim was messed up by the council, they got it wrong, by not including the paperwork id sent in for our CTC and WTC, so the whole calculation of claim was wrong, just took them 3 months to work this out, YES we had the debts, and not faulted on rent or the debts.

I had taken up being an avon rep in june last year (before my maternity pay ran out) *to do something* but over the last couple of months, before the panic of debts arose things changed at home, My daughter (9) had become unsettled in her new year group at school, and other then our son (1) the avon job was the only factor i could think of that was taking up so much of my time away from my family, I have now given this up


Part of the reason why we agreed for me to give up work was because of the expense of travelling to and from, having to cut my hours to get my son from where he was being looked after as i'm not a beleiver of putting young children into nurserys/childcare Call it old fashioned but early years care should be by a childs mother!

It is just one excuse after the other, I honestly can not see why you are asking for advice, as everything that has been said to you, out comes another excuse, you obviously are not going to get your self out of this mess until you stop blaming other people, and take stock of your self and your own failings.

Don't forget the new one,

" BUT how on earth does that give you time with your other half during the week? how did you sleep when your kids werent at school? Cos right now with a 1 year old, working nights would be completely impracticle"

tomitma

ceejaydee23 wrote: »

ermmmm yes WE got into debt! and until the mess up with the council we were coping with them, so get off your high horse by telling me i'm a failure cos right now you ARE NOT HELPING ME so i wont be listening to you! In fact i wish this thread closed now, i wont be responding again!

Talk about a kid having a tantrum, it is about time that you grew up and faced the facts. Until you get off your backside and help yourself you are going to go no where, there are people on these sites whose lives ARE IN A REAL MESS through no fault of there own. I will go out of my way to help these people, but then you get some one like you, who, is blaming everyone else for everything, even down to your other half, for having the TV package, and the debts that you are in.

Stop making excuses, get off your fat backside and get some work.

Indie_Kid

Why are you spending £55 on mobiles and £95 a month on Sky?

SingleSue

ceejaydee23 wrote: »

Well thankfully as commented on someone elses thread i went to cab 2day, it seems there is some scope regarding the omission from the councils failure to have got my claim right to begin with.

Keelni i admire that, BUT how on earth does that give you time with your other half during the week? how did you sleep when your kids werent at school? Cos right now with a 1 year old, working nights would be completely impracticle.

Iwanttosavemoney2008 I will talk through that kind of thing with my other half, IF i could maybe get a few hours at one of the supermarkets during the day on a saturday or one of the shops in our town I wouldnt mind, IF the jobs are available, but obviously so far its not something i've been looking for so wouldnt know at the moment, BUT its got to be agreeable by the pair of us, esp if it means him coming out to pick me up again!

I did evening/night work as stated in my post, my youngest son at the time was 1 (nearly 2), my middle son 3 and eldest was 6. Middle son barely slept, hubby had hypo's and daytimes were a nightmare due to the two younger ones having a disability.

We coped, I suppose it helps I am an insomniac but I overdid things....after 5 years my brain and body broke but then, by that time, I was surviving on around 2 hours sleep a night, working some hours during the daytime plus my evening/night hours, when not working, trailing around to medical appointments or school meetings and having a very stressful time.

I took it to the extreme trying to prove I was superwoman but that is not really needed and sticking to the hours set is quite doable.

For seeing your partner, well a decision needs to be made..do you continue in poo street as you are now or put up with a little bit of inconvenience and move yourselves out of poo street.

sunnyone

before tax credits WE had to pay for our own children, I went back to work when my daughter was 6 weeks old because my husbands business was doing badly due to resession, I then worked nights when she was one year old after his buisness picked up, I slept when she did or my husband was at home but we coped, that and we only had what we could afford and not what we could get on plastic.

No one is going to help you but you, stop the excuses and get a job to pay your own debts and get rid of the really expensive sky package and/or the HD TV to free up cash to pay the bills and debts (no doubt you payed for the TV by credit and its not even payed for:eek:)

Early years care would be best done by parents and if thats what you wanted you should have put your finances in order before having a second child to ensure that you could afford to sit at home scared of you own shadow (or the shadow of your excuses more like)

If you had kept the money to pay the council appart while they sorted out BENEFITS (not so minimal the goverment help is it, you claimed you got minimal benefits in the first post) you would have had the money to pay the bill when it came but you would still have problems and ever bigger debts looming.

ceejaydee23

Thank you SingleSue for at least being honest and answering my question, In my view health will always come 2nd after my family BUT as you found out things can backfire, sometimes health issues should overrule everything else!

After again speaking with my other half we have discussed a few things regarding myself working to fit around everything else, IE trying to find either a position that i could do on a saturday/sunday AND also cutting down on the TV package again, he even said he would get rid of his beloved skysports! Now for him to say that, I think its finally hit home to him too, that we gotta make sacrifices. We looked through the job pages, and theres a new warehouse opening locally so he will be enquiring about work there to see if it may be more then what he is getting now, and had my other half not have to leave for work at 7.20ish then there could have been a cleaning job for 2 hours monday-friday i could have done, but the hours were 5.45am-7.45am so there was a clash there.

ceejaydee23

i was paying ALL my bills and had no outstanding tax infact when we applied for the council tax and housing benefit we were in credit, by £192 but like most people would have done, we claimed that back, and it went into a savings account for help towards our childrens christmas presents (is that so wrong?) i was up to date with my rent too, even paying what i thought i should be paying whilst my benefits were being sorted out, as i was told id have been getting £85 a week, but as i said that turned out to be wrong, as it was an error that they then admited to, so it was AFTER the discovery and reclaiming of benefits that we are now in trouble. YES we got carried away with "spending on plastic" that was when we were both working, and NOT LIVING together! we have only been living together for the last year, and it has been a bloody struggle we've had to cut bk on so much from living 2 seperate lives, and now because of this mess up we're now realising just how badly things had got.

AnxiousMum

ceejaydee23 wrote: »

After again speaking with my other half we have discussed a few things regarding myself working to fit around everything else, IE trying to find either a position that i could do on a saturday/sunday AND also cutting down on the TV package again, he even said he would get rid of his beloved skysports! Now for him to say that, I think its finally hit home to him too, that we gotta make sacrifices.

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Beggars belief......tell him to get out of his armchair sports position, turn the tv off, and sit down and work out a doable monthly budget with you that actually provides for your families needs.......not armchair sports! And this is what you want more benefits for???

tomitma

gord she must have the skin of a rhino is nothing getting through to her!!!!!

WHAT GETS ME IS, THAT HER KIDS ARE TOO YOUNG TO EVEN APPRECIATE CHRISTMAS, SHE COULD HAVE GONE TO A CHARITY SHOP FOR THERE PRESENTS THEY WOULDN'T HAVE KNOWN THE DIFFERENCE.