need advice no sign of the money MIL owes me HELP!!!

paddy's_mum

So ... they went bankrupt (hurting others in the financial crossfire, no doubt) but appear to have learned absolutely nothing.

In your shoes, I'd be thinking that the 2 grand is lost to me, but was well spent in learning the true characters of this pair. To know that they cannot be trusted, that they will virtually rob their own son, and all without a moment's sorrow or guilt is information for which I would gladly have paid double what you stand to lose.

Can you credit anyone being so stupid as to throw away their reputation for the sake of a few quid? Are they so blind that they can't see that they stand to jeopardise or outright lose their relationship with their son and his partner, and perhaps future grandchildren, and all for the sake of a bit of restraint and not having whatever takes their fancy this week.

I'd also add that 2k is a small amount of money to pay to find out that your partner is supportive and loyal, and is not afraid to tackle anyone in pursuit of doing the right thing. You can't put a value on that kind of quiet courage and honesty. Good luck to you both and may karma get the in-laws

thriftymanc

Go round and say you're just there to use your bathroom. If they look confused, just say "well it was paid for with my two grand wasn't it?". Keep turning up every single day saying that you're just popping round to use your shower - or that you've got a horrendously upset stomach and need to spend an hour or so on your toilet! Even better, copy one of their house keys first and let yourself in unannounced to use it. They might get the hint after that...

pinkshoes

youngmummy wrote: »

hi thanks for all your replys .... we are going to there house tommorrow and we're going to tell them stright that we need the money as i personally think they were hoping they could walk all over us and we wouldnt ask for it back.
they have had dept or their life .... they went bankcrupt 20 years ago ... and altho they borrowed that money off us they have just took out more loans credit cards ect. and pay everythink off in minimum repayment .... i know i have a catolougue but it is 0% so im not paying any intrest and i have only had it a month and each month will be paying at least double minimum repayment. i will be using the money in my pot for the loan.
we did ask them if they could start paying us back when we took out the loan and they said they dont have a penny spare and they cant afford to yet ... at that point my partner jumped in and said if it was a loan from the bank they wouldnt have a choice and they would have to pay when the bank said not when they felt like it .... my partner has said he will tell them tommorrow that they need to start paying it back ...tbh i think it will end in a huge argument as MIL and FIL can be very selfish
thanks for all your comments ,

So, how did it go?

Given their financial history, I very much doubt you'll ever see a penny of that money back, and I think it was very optimistic to expect them to pay it back in the first place!

If you spend say £50 on presents for them each year, then stop immediately. At least that way the debt will be paid in 40 years :eek:

I'd either put it down to experience and forget it, or take them to court for the money! Any other way will lead to potentially years of frustration!

PolishBigSpender

And this is why you should never lend money to family members. Certainly, it's never "MoneySaving" to do so!

youngmummy

hi all again thanks for your replys ..... we told them in the nicest way possible that we needed the money back and that we are not a charity. anyway to cut a long story short we had the whole we can afford to pay you back yet but we will get it back to you (we know we will never see it again) .... but i have learnt from my mistake. we will never be lending money to them again there old enough to stand on there own too feet. they are that bad MIL brother had to pay for there dog to be put too sleep so he wouldnt carry on suffering because they didnt have the £20 insurance excess. i know by next june i will have no dept (fingers crossed) and some savings .... i dont want to be in there shoes living off dept all my life. there is only 2 of them they get their rent paid and council tax and they have about £800 a month for food bills DEPTS credit cards catologue ect , we have about £600 p/mth left over after rent council tax and their is me OH and our LO and a dog, and cat ..... i cant under stand how they dont have a penny spare not even £30 a month too pay us back. anyway sorry for the moaning posts Merry christmas too everyone thankyou for all your replys im very greatfull. x

[Deleted User]

Hi,

oh well, lesson learned, as said previously, cut them off your prezzie list, Christmas, birthdays, anniversaries, whatever, least you will save a wee bit.

abby1234519

Nah just threaten them with money claim online eg the courts. Say you want an agreement I writing that you will pay a small amount a month. If they really can't spare £10 out of that £800? Your still taking this lying down! They have No respect for you if they won't even pay £1!!! which is what, one less packet of biscuits a month or they can't have so many cups of tea. If you don't stand up now, you wait till they get older and need nursing care.... They'll expect you to pay for it

shaven-monkey

If / When you go round again take food from their cupboards to the value of the interest they owe.
Which is approximately £30 per month and increasing. Currently they owe you about £80 just from inflation and for simplicities sake £360 at 1.5% interest per month.
If the removal of food doesn't clarify things then take their kettle, microwave, lightbulbs and other non-essentials.
Meet objections with "well you've taken food out of our mouths by refusing to pay us back for our kindness."
Overly dramatic, potentially criminal but it may be a graphic enough demonstration to wake them up.

cheepskate_2

youngmummy wrote: »

... i cant under stand how they dont have a penny spare not even £30 a month too pay us back.

Nothing to do with not having money, but all do do with their morals.

please DO NOT , no matter how bad you feel, give them a pressie(if you really must a £1 box of chocs out of poundshop)

If they dare to say anything, be polite but say YOU are now in debt, because they have not paid you back a bean.



I very seldom advocate falling out with family , but ........