Has anyone regretted going Bankrupt

confused76

andyf1980 wrote: »

I regret not going BR sooner. Because of my job I kept telling myself I had no option (I would have been sacked).

It was only when I got ill and subsequently left my job that I faced up to the fact that I had no alternative.

After 6 months of unemployment I've just started a job that I actually enjoy and am slowly getting my life back on track. :j

it's good to hear that things are getting better

diddly74

Both my Husband and I went BR on the same day - My only regrets about going BR is losing our house. Notice I don't say home. We are now living in rented accommodation that is lovely and we are really happy in but I feel insecure because I haven't got over that feeling they can give me notice any month and turf us out. I don't like having to ask permission to do stuff.

So that is my only regret - losing the feeling of security the house gave me, but I don't regret losing the pressure I used to feel about the upkeep of it. That said I love where we now live and our LLs are great - no hassle getting jobs done - it was more of a hassle getting them to accept us as BRs and tennants (that may be where my feelings of insecurity come from?)

The only other hardship (if you can call it one) that I find is trying to save money for things I used to put on the credit card i.e. servicing the car etc. Its not that the OR didn't give us allowances to save - but there always seems to be something coming along that needs paying - a bill, christmas, new school uniforms, etc so I don't save.

I need to work on my saving this year and looking forward to being discharged in March!

Tupperware_Queen

andyf1980 wrote: »

I regret not going BR sooner. Because of my job I kept telling myself I had no option (I would have been sacked).

It was only when I got ill and subsequently left my job that I faced up to the fact that I had no alternative.

After 6 months of unemployment I've just started a job that I actually enjoy and am slowly getting my life back on track. :j

I was worried about my job too, but actually has not been a problem.

FavDaughter1

I understand what you mean about saving allowances for things like repairs, we've had the fire break and a curtain rail now,hubbys trainers are looking a bit thin on the soles too, why do things always break when you are broke??? we plan to look for trainers in the sales.

the posts are all very helpful and it does help to know it's not just us feeling this way. i understand about loosing the house/home, it's something we've give that lot's of thought. we have to cling to the positives.

i'm not sleeping and started with panic attacks yesterday,i ended up getting up and sitting up 'till late last night.

you've all helped so much,thankyou,hug x

sealsandsqueals

I don't regret it so far although I still feel I have a long way to go - almost four months since my BR date and still haven't heard anything about an IPA (although I did email to check if the new rules will affect me and I was was told there had been no change in the way IPAs were calculated - would like to see it in writing though!!).

One thing I would say is my biggest fear before BR was confessing to my boyfriend about my situation - he knew I had debt but didn't know the extent of it. I genuinely didn't think he' stick around. The warts and all conversation I had was the hardest thing I have ever done....tears from both us. I was tempted to do it all and not tell him but now I am so glad I did - I couldn't have done it without his support and the best thing about BR for me is how the lies and secrecy have stopped. I also told my parents and they too were amazing.....they are the three people I have initiated into my BR club!! The secrecy from them before BR almost overshadowed the worry from the actual debt, does that make sense?

One more little thing has happened since D day - my boyfriend proposed to me!! I'm looking forward to a really cosy Xmas with my BR club - just the four of us with no secrecy. I still have really down days and panic about things but can see light at the end of the tunnel.

If I'd known I'd feel like this I'd have done it sooner rather than spend the last few years living as a complete shell of the real me.....I'm slowly get my MOJO back!

Falze

sealsandsqueals wrote: »

One more little thing has happened since D day - my boyfriend proposed to me!!

Congrats S&S. Whens the big day ??

:beer:

diddly74

In addition to what I said before. I have also found other people's ideas of what bankrupcty is, to be hampering e.g. my LL (when he was still a propspective LL) thought that the OR had all my income and gave me pocket money and paid everything for me.

I think because of the stigma that was always attached to be a Bankrupt, people have a lot of misconceptions of what happens, how it happens, how long it lasts for.

I am not ashamed of being BR and will talk to anyone about it, but neither do I broadcast it en large if you know what I mean.

sealsandsqueals

Thanks Falze.....so happy, really feels like a start of a new beginning.

The big day will be pretty small but next May....I'm taking budget bride to a whole new level! Having my nan's engagement ring was a great start and means so much more to me than a huge-on credit-rock!!

sealsandsqueals

I agree Diddly, which is why I don't tell too many people - I need to be able to sit down and explain half of the things on this forum to them - otherwise they fill in the gaps with weird little bits they've heard over the years.

In some ways, I'm hoping that one day when I've recovered, I'll have the satisfaction of telling people what I went through and they won't have had a clue! That might make them realise it can happen to anyone, it's really tough but people can come out the other side and there's no need to judge people.

zebramolli

I was b/r May 08 to May 09, it was a tough decision but my partner was very supportive. Being in Scotland it only cost £100 and was very quick, the people who dealt with everything were helpful and friendly whereas I was expecting a lot of judgement

Getting rid of £15,000 worth of debt was great, it was a massive relief. I unexpectedly fell pregnant in the summer of 09 and we would never have managed to finance a child with so much debt so I was unintentionally planning for the future :rotfl:

I don't regret it, but I know it does have an effect in my life still. My partner and I had been in our rented house since Sept 07 so were worried our LA/LL wouldn't allow us to stay but they were very understanding. It saddens me that it will be a long time until we can even consider getting our own home!

The only thing I struggle with is not having a regular bank account, Lloyds refused to take the markers off my basic cash account when I produced my letter of discharge which means everything goes through my now husbands account. I'm looking forward to when they will consider allowing us to have a joint account.

Something to make you smile, my MIL is a former bank manager her face was a picture when her darling son declared he was marrying a bankruptee (sp?).

I'm still learning my lesson, managing finances not spending for the sake of it. It's hard, but I wouldn't change my decision.