O/S disasters.... let us share...

bouncydog1

Chip pan fire when I was 12 and decided to make my younger brother and sister some lunch! Burnt saucepan aged 14 when my mum asked me to keep an eye on the Christmas pudding, went off to the living room to do my piano practice and forgot about it! Remembered when the living room door was flung open and my mother was stood there with black smoke billowing round her! Made my brother lasagne once and had a couple of glasses of wine whilst making ( it was 8pm) and put a couple of spoonfuls of black pepper in instead of herbs. His face was a picture!! Piece de resistance has to be the microwave egg poacher DD an I bought for her to take to Uni - hers were fine. I decided mine needed a fraction longer - there was an enormous bang and we discovered the egg had exploded and blown the lid off. Micro particles of egg everywhere in the microwave which took over an hour to clean. Unfortunately the egg went up into the grill elements so awful burning smell for weeks afterwards. I hope there are no more!!

[Deleted User]

my late OH once blew my kitchen up !!! he was trying to be helpful as I wanted a work surface built in the tiny kitchen we had in our flat .This was back in the 1960s before the advent of 'posh kitchens .He decided that some formica sheets would look good stuck down onto the frame he had spent hours building.He got the adhesive and looked at the tin and it said no naked lights anywhwere Not a problem he turned of the gas cooker pilot lights and proceeded to liberally spread this gunk on the sheets.It smelt very strongly of glue so I was in the sitting room and said "are you ok in there ?"
" Its very smelly stuff he replied I'll open the window" as he did this the whole of the kitchen blew up with an almighty bang and there were flames everywhere.He had turned off the cooker pilot lights and forgot the tiny water heater over the sink which gave us hot water from a tiny thin metal arm.
I flew in there and he turned round and the whole of the front of him was covered in black sooty stuff and he looked like nothing on earth.Even his eyebrows had been crisped off.The fresh air had ingnited the fumes .The whole of the kitchen was covered in a black grime and it took me weeks to get it off.It also took weeks for his eyebrows to re-grow again.He swore he would stay away from DIY for ever after that, and he did. Any decorating was done by me :):) He wouldn't pick up a paint brush after that :):).
Bless him he couldn't understand what went wrong.:):):)

craigywv

sorry but I am in fits here laughing at your near misses.................mine ...........deffo avoid tins of corned beef ! whilst making baked potatoes in oven melted top of hand on top shelf then in shock pressed palm onto bottom shelf ....then top shelf again .....then bottom shelf ! a & e for 5 hrs! slicing watermelon managed to slice thru 3 finger nails lucky they were long and not my fingers. in the 80 s was engrossed watching lovejoy and put stuff under grill ................at end of programme REMEMBERED said grill opened door and had melted ceiling above grill! 2 dogs had to be brought to vets for smoke inhalation ....let out next day fine! HATE LOVEJOY NEVEER WATCHED IT AGAIN!

Emm-in-a-pickle

Great thread - I`ve had a good chuckle so here`s my contribution!
First notable disaster was when trying to make tapioca pudding in a pressure cooker. Pebbledashed kitchen ceiling, with very dramatic sound effects too. I gave up on pressure cooking, found slow cookers a lot safer.

MANY burnt pans in my culinary history - rice is particularly bad, but at least electric steamers can`t boil dry and rice dish is a bonus, so burnt pans are less common here these days.

I once `branded` my thumb heating baked beans in a pan, left the spoon in and grabbed it to give another stir - the curly pattern on the spoon handle stayed on my thumb for ages.

My late husband was a great cook, and also great at making home made wine. Sampling the latter when cooking a roast was a double disaster. He forgot all about the roasting potatoes till we were halfway through the meal, then went to get them out of the oven, burnt his fingers and the burnt roasties went all over the kitchen floor. We thought we`d picked them all up, but the next day my son (then in his early teens) went into the kitchen in his bare feet and CUT his foot on one of the roasties, bled like anything.
These days, the kitchen is my domain, my OH doesn`t get involved. Just as well, as he once nearly lost a finger trying to open a tin - with a circular pizza cutter!!

dianasnan

Decided to make rice pudding in my pressure cooker and turned the heat up too high. the Rice pud exploded out of the vent and hit the ceiling and walls. Just couldn't stop the fountain of Rice Pud .Clear up took ages as we have a artex ceiling and I never could get all the bits off it, probably some still there 15 years later.:D
My Mum, bless her, cooked a M&S chocolate pud in her microwave, overcooked it by some margin and set fire to both the pud and the microwave. Fire brigade were very good but the smoke made a terrible mess of the kitchen and bathroom.

siegemode

Thanks to everyone for sharing and making me laugh so much. These disasters are not funny at the time (well most aren't) but we all have them and I have had to read them all to OH because I keep bursting into laughter.
Love this thread, thanks BoP:beer:

Lilyplonk

When opening a DENTED tin of chopped tomatoes - make sure you cover the tin opener with a tea-towel/clean dishcloth BEFORE piercing the darn can :o:o.

Looks like Freddie Kruger has been in my kitchen at the moment :eek:!

LandyAndy

Oh dear. Almost all tins of tomatoes seem to be dented to some extent. I've never had even one explode though. I do tend to use the ringpull ones.

4nnabella

Not quite the same thing but I was getting my two-year-old some milk last night, overfilled the cup slightly and as I pressed the lid on, managed to squirt a fountain of milk all up the kitchen window...

LameWolf

Thanks for the timely warning, Lilyplonk. I use a lot of tinned toms, albeit I usually seem to get ring pull tins. I imagine the same caution would apply to baked beans or anything with potentially messy sauce in the tin.:o

I'm reminded of a tale my DH tells; years ago, his sister, who was working in France, brought home a bottle of champagne as a treat for Xmas; DH's dad had never opened champagne before, and omitted to completely remove the little metal cage and metal cap before getting the cork out, he just loosened the cage. When the cork came out, it went with an almighty POP, flew up to the ceiling, with the metal cap still attached, and embossed the ceiling with the design on the metal cap!:rotfl: