Mother's contribution to home

HappyMJ

You could send her to live in a flat provided for free by the council or a housing association but I'm sure you want her close so I wouldn't charge her or if I did I'd charge her what she would pay in rent after Housing Benefit which in this case would be nothing.

Rubie-blu

Kepar - I know it sounds like i shouldn't be stuggling, but I am - i get paid 15th of month and all my direct debits nearly clear my account by 18th/19th of month. I work out what I can spend on food/household shopping for that 10 days/fortnight plus petrol. My mum usually pays me on 28th and generally that comes with a shopping list. My partner pays me on 4th/5th which just takes me up to 15th again. Maybe I am being selfish, because i can't afford to spend money on what I want on me? My OR made me reduce costs on things like water (actual £45 a month but she said £30, Council Tax £131, she said £100 max) I've tried to budget and work out ways to cut back, but its not working for me yet anyway.

somethingcorporate

Rubie-blu wrote: »

Kepar - I know it sounds like i shouldn't be stuggling, but I am - i get paid 15th of month and all my direct debits nearly clear my account by 18th/19th of month. I work out what I can spend on food/household shopping for that 10 days/fortnight plus petrol. My mum usually pays me on 28th and generally that comes with a shopping list. My partner pays me on 4th/5th which just takes me up to 15th again. Maybe I am being selfish, because i can't afford to spend money on what I want on me? My OR made me reduce costs on things like water (actual £45 a month but she said £30, Council Tax £131, she said £100 max) I've tried to budget and work out ways to cut back, but its not working for me yet anyway.

Keep a spending diary for a couple of months to work out where your £1k 'surplus' a month goes, then you can plan your budget a little better.

I would suggest that your partners £500 is too low rather than your mothers £250.

Good luck.

duncan303

@Alastairq having difficulty with your phrasing, have you been drinking?

the OP refers to her mothers pensions "and her pensions come to roughly £1051 a month" where is the mention of benefits?, what about private pensions

methinks the tenfold is your burden

I have formed the opinion that the OP is looking for an easy tap, thats my prerogative and the licence was provided by the OP when she asked for "any thoughts"; for some people getting into debt is like an illness similar to drug addicts they would steal from their own granny or take food from their babies mouths.


Anyway I realise my thoughts may be controversial, perhaps I should have said " yeah take all her money and get her to take out more cards and use them to buy tittat on the internet and wide screen tellies etc.then let the old biddy go bankrupt likewise, after all she cant read the mail and she'll probably be dead soon and the card will clear itself anyway.

what thoughts does anyone have of the stress that is caused to an 86 year old woman with 20 grand debts on credit cards and ...........better stop here before the moral defenders get uptite


...

Rubie-blu

I don't want to send her to live in a flat provided free by the council.

Rent £950
Gas 115
Electric £115
Water £45
Council Tax £131
BT £50 (although this does include BB and BT vision which I haven't included in my mum's calculation)

Maybe it is just my budgeting, but I am finding hard. The gas and electric originally included arrears, but based on usage I thought it safe to keep it at that level to make sure I kept up with it. I took out the BT package, but my mum phones 09 numbers and BT were trying to take £110 off me so I had to put a bar on the phone so I got her a mobile so she can see what those calls cost. Gawd, i feel disgusted with myself now...:(

duncan303

@Rubie-blu

having read your post ^ I consider my last post to be excessively harsh.



..

McKneff

Why dont you post up an SOA so we can maybe help you.
for instance, a water meter would cost you less than £45 a month.

You could ask if you could pay your council tax over 12 months instead of 10.

See what I mean, other savings could be made I'm sure.

I think youre probably right when you say 'its my budgeting'

Rubie-blu

My original "any thoughts" was really asking if I was being reasonable or not. I can see by your responses that I'm clearly not being reasonable and just looking to bleed my mum dry before she dies. Thanks for your help.. x

Rubie-blu

I did ask, and my council tax is over 12 not 10.

Rubie-blu

and im in rented property which has got water meter and I keep it at 45 to make sure i don't go in arrears with it.