Early-retirement wannabe

OldMusicGuy

I never mentioned downsizing to a flat on retirement. We are downsizing to a smaller house on retirement, one that will be kitted out specifically for a retired couple. That will last us until we can no longer look after it (planning for 85 to 90 age range but we will have to see how things go). At that point we sell that house and move into a flat.

We are phasing downsizing to release equity during retirement and also match our requirements in terms of quality of life.

jamesperrett

Bimbly wrote: »

I'm surprised at the number of people wanting to downsize to a flat on retirement. Sounds miserable. Get a smaller place, yes, or a bungalow. But a flat?

I recently met some old friends who have downsized to a flat - but it came with the communal use of a 10 acre garden.

kidmugsy

DairyQueen wrote: »

house maintenance is a pain at any age but at least you have the time and capability to deal with it in early retirement.

Then your back must be better than mine.

DairyQueen

kidmugsy wrote: »

Then your back must be better than mine.

I don't 'do' ceilings.

Younger stepd and her OH completed on their first home this week. I just sent an email of congrats with an offer of help decorating. What was I thinking? :wall:

OldMusicGuy

DairyQueen wrote: »

House maintenance is a pain once you reach your late 70s. Come to think of it, house maintenance is a pain at any age but at least you have the time and capability to deal with it in early retirement.

We both enjoy DIY. I've restored two Victorian houses in my youth and am pretty handy with the brushes and rollers, although in recent years I have paid people to do work as I have been too busy with the day job. My wife is great at interior design and soft furnishings. So part of the reason for retiring early was to downsize to a place that we could do up/improve.

I've spent the first 6 months of retirement getting our current place ready to sell. I really overestimated how much I could do as a 61 year old compared to me in my 20s and 30s! Although I can still do quite a lot, I am slower than I used to be and I wasn't confident going up the ladder anymore to paint the upstairs windows, so have had to pay someone to do that. It's certainly reinforced for me the impact of ageing, and thus the need to plan for the process in all aspects of life, not just the financial ones.

So don't leave anything too late is my advice, and retire as early as is financially possible.

Spreadsheetman

OldMusicGuy wrote: »

We both enjoy DIY. I've restored two Victorian houses in my youth and am pretty handy with the brushes and rollers, although in recent years I have paid people to do work as I have been too busy with the day job. My wife is great at interior design and soft furnishings. So part of the reason for retiring early was to downsize to a place that we could do up/improve.

I've spent the first 6 months of retirement getting our current place ready to sell. I really overestimated how much I could do as a 61 year old compared to me in my 20s and 30s! Although I can still do quite a lot, I am slower than I used to be and I wasn't confident going up the ladder anymore to paint the upstairs windows, so have had to pay someone to do that. It's certainly reinforced for me the impact of ageing, and thus the need to plan for the process in all aspects of life, not just the financial ones.

So don't leave anything too late is my advice, and retire as early as is financially possible.

Both my Father and FIL lost the ability to safely climb ladders (inc. low stepladders) in their early 80s (even though they were both fit), so have had to hire out most decorating jobs since then.

It's one of the reasons I'd be very cautious in assuming total expenditure drops with age, even without any issues of health/care.

DairyQueen

lisyloo wrote: »

This is a challenge and I would say strong advocacy is what's needed.

Good advocates (i.e. people you can trust and who are articulate) and a power of attorney.
Also have some replacement advocates who are younger if possible.
If you pick your siblings, friends, partner and you live to a grand old age, then there's a possibility you might outlive them all.

My MIL (now 88 and in a very good care home courtesy of house equity) was fortunate to produce four highly articulate children. She is spoilt for choice in the POA stakes and both my SILs have POA. My parents (age 81 and 79) are still living independently and are in the process of arranging POAs. They didn't plan so well as they stopped at two children, one of whom has the 'money disaster' gene. That leaves me (non-expert but not a disaster zone either).

Emotion is best left at the door when appointing a POA but it can be an emotive issue. My parents have signalled very clearly that they want me to hold POA but they also wish to appoint my sibling to avoid accusations of favouritism. Good Lord above. They believe that his lack of interest in all such matters will determine that I make all the decisions without the emotional 'discomfort' of making me sole POA. I hope they are right or I will be shouldering all of the responsibility but with the extra complication of accommodating the sensitivities and ill-informed opinions of my sibling.

Lucky is the person who has a clutch of younger, articulate, competent, trustworthy relatives.

Mr DQ and I have discussed our own situation and would prefer (for reasons you state) not to appoint each other. He has two adult daughters in their 20s, both of whom are articulate but lack life experience. The older one is a tough cookie and not beyond seeking the main chance at her sister's expense. The younger is the opposite - highly empathetic but too gentle to stand her ground. We have ruled them out and are likely to approach one of his older nieces/nephews to be his POA.

I have no children and my nephews are minors. That leaves cousins and their offspring. I have enough of these to fill a small cathedral but only one has the qualities I seek in a POA. I am hoping she will agree or I will have to resort to a professional as POA.

lisyloo wrote: »

Also don't forget that some people manage with assisted living / carer visits.

This can be more expensive than residential care. It requires a large pension, equity release, and/or very supportive (and local) relatives/friends. I know many who receive in-home support but their needs are always more than the provision offered by the LA. MIL was desperate to stay in her home but required help with everything from gardening to housework, laundry to meals. She was also prone to falls and wasn't safe alone. She was offered one visit daily by the LA but she needed someone around all of the time - not exceptional for those age 85+. That level of self-funded, in-home care costs more than double that of a good residential home.

lisyloo wrote: »

I would say that moving before you need the facilities so they are in place is a good plan.
Our parents did not want to face moving at 89 and they also found it very difficult to adjust to anything at all, so make the changes before you need them.

Agree. Problem is that most people don't do this. Some plan for it in early retirement but then don't follow through (my parents). Others are in total denial about the possibility (my MIL), Emotions seem to trump the practical in pretty much every aspect of life as we age.

My mother has been severely disabled for over 25 years (she has MS) so you would think that my parents would have long ago ensured that their housing was appropriate for someone with reduced mobility.

Er, no.

The bungalow they moved to 20 years ago was appropriate for their needs then. Now it is in the wrong area and location to access the health services she needs (postcode lottery applies). The layout is a nightmare for someone requiring walking aids. It has a high maintenance garden. They need a car. Their mistake? Underestimating back then just how disabled my mother would become and failing to appreciate the effects of ageing on my dad.

After three years of procrastinating about a house move (mother keen, father reluctant) they missed the window of (mum's) inclination and stayed put. It has taken a chunk of their remaining capital to adapt the house to meet my mum's basic needs. The wet room alone cost £8k, plus installing a new door, widening others, dropped cills, ramps, etc. But the cost of changing the layout is too high and nothing will change the location or the funding priorities of the cash-strapped LA. They now rely on me and paid support to meet most domestic needs.

They (i.e. dad) couldn't face the disruption of moving and he was then still under 80.

The experience of our ageing parents has ensured that Mr DQ and I have a laundry list a mile long of requirements for our final home and we will move there long before Mr DQ's 75th birthday.

Many of these requirements are not considered until you need them. Anyone care to add to my laundry list? Currently:

- No steps/stairs
- Ground floor with parking as close as possible to the front door
- Large wet room
- A loo close to the living areas
- Wide doorways and halls, no cills
- Large kitchen and living room (separate as we hate open-plan living areas)
- Size of rooms more important than number
- No garden other than a large, private terrace/balcony and no house maintenance
- En suite loo minimum
- Eye level oven
- Separate utility with top-loader washer and drier (do such things exist in the UK?)
- Lots of storage
- Daily 'check' visit from caregiver
- 24/7 emergency response provided by (very) local service
- All levels of self-funded care and support available very locally.

We are considering something like this.

Anyone have any experience of this kind of retirement village? Expensive and not a great investment other than, possibly, in quality of life, but that's our priority.

crv1963

Spreadsheetman wrote: »

Both my Father and FIL lost the ability to safely climb ladders (inc. low stepladders) in their early 80s (even though they were both fit), so have had to hire out most decorating jobs since then.

It's one of the reasons I'd be very cautious in assuming total expenditure drops with age, even without any issues of health/care.

I too am not so sure that spending drops and that rather it changes, in my mothers case it is help with things like cutting high hedges, tall ladder work such as clearing the guttering etc. She does at 79 now use a set of steps with a platform rather than the traditional A style ones. She did some decorating but I got someone in for the ceilings and wall papering for ease and speed really my comfort and peace of mind. Although she did say she was grateful.


She keeps doing all the gardening and every other aspect of keeping house I also think it is a confidence thing, fear of the fall or time recovering from a fall, she fractured a rib clearing snow and 7 months later still has the odd ache from it.


With several hundred feet of tall hedges in our garden I am definitely going to pay someone to trim them probably sooner than later- they are speedier, neater and for me safer that way and it's only twice a year.


We already live in an isolated bungalow with a large garden so my idea is to now make it as being maintained with the least effort, hedges, lawns and once a year trimmed plants being my choice. That way when we're infirm the costs to pay someone is kept down.

DairyQueen

OldMusicGuy wrote: »

We both enjoy DIY. I've restored two Victorian houses in my youth and am pretty handy with the brushes and rollers,

There's the rub. Mr DQ is the same age as you and very active/healthy. He is competent enough with a paint brush but he hates DIY and would much rather reach for his cheque book.

I am seeking ways to incentivise him into retirement but have (so far) spectacularly failed. If I suggested any kind of retirement (DIY) project he would batten down the employment hatches. He works very hard but, after 40 years, his job/career are so much a part of his identity and lifestyle hat he is struggling to imagine life after work, let alone plan for the inevitable. So much so that he has recently been offered the chance to supplement his 3-day working week with consultancy. He grabbed the opportunity.

If the markets keep rising it won't be long before he hits his LTA

As you are a recent retiree from a similar (I think) employment background any suggestions on how I can help prepare him?

kidmugsy

OldMusicGuy wrote: »

I wasn't confident going up the ladder anymore to paint the upstairs windows

Now you're just boasting that your doctor allows you to go up ladders.